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When i was little i thought when parents would ground their kid they would actually dig a hole and put the kid in. they were actually underground.
One day my parents would peel their faces off to reveal they were aliens.
When i little, my mom used to be able to pull random objects out of my ears.
I used to believe my Dad's sister was really Dolly Parton. Everytime we went to her house she was on tv (Dollly), my aunt wore a platinum blond wig, had a big chest that was always partly exposed and she talked with a slight southern accent.
Me and alll of my cousins call my grandma MoMo and my grandpa PoPo(not po-po completly difrent and sound diffrent too) So I never really new what a Grandma and Grandpa were until I saw this one episode of Barney.
I used to think that Grown-ups couldn't cry. I was 5 and my mom and dad were going through a divorce. i had never seen a Grown up cry. I just thought that they didnt cry. Up until the day my mom feel through the attic.... she was so upset about the divorce and trying to be so strong for me, my sister and my brother that she just broke down.
I remember just being shocked... and I asked her how she could cry.....
My parents are horror film freaks and exposed me to horror films way too early. I truly believed that all of my dolls came alive at night, and one in particular was evil. Everynight as I slept with my teddy- I would walk around the room and tell each and every one of my dolls that i loved them verrrrry much and would kiss them goodnight before turning them around so that they wouldn't try to kill teddy. After a while the evil doll really did start to move. I would memorize exactly where I left it-- and it was never the same when I returned. I finally asked my mother to burn the ugly doll and she agreed to do so.... My senior year of high school I walked in to my room to find that doll on my bed. I literally peed my pants and didn't talk to my mother for a week.
I used to believe that parents could 'donate' naughty children to Amish families because they needed so many people to run their farms, and that during particularly hard seasons they would roam around and kidnap wandering or crying kids.
This is probably because my father used to threaten to give me to the Amish when I misbehaved.
i used to think that if i drank milk with watermelon i would die because the mix was poisonous because my grandma told me that, so until this day i haven't mix them..
When I was about 4 or 5, I had learned that blind people had "seeing-eye dogs" to help guide them around, and that many of these dogs were German Shepherds. My grandmother had a German Shepherd named Baron and he always seemed to be at her side. So one day I asked my mother "Is Grandma blind?" because I assumed that Baron was her guide dog.
One time when I was little and wasn't listening to my mom, she warned me to behave or else I would "live with the consequences!" I immediately asked "who are they?" (I imagined that the Consequences were a really mean old couple who lived in a house with no toys and didn't like kids.)
My Mum told me she invented skipping and I believed her and told all my friends - still living that one down
I used to believe that my uncle's younger brother was not one of my relatives. I was amazed when I learned that he is also my uncle.
when i was very young, i told my childless aunt and uncle that they should name their first kid "hammerhead-shark-fin-poopy-butt hund."
they're having twins this march.
Once when I played with wet paint and got it all over me, my brother told me I would get "a lickin" when dad got home. I thought that meant I would get a popsicle. Boy was I suprised!
When I was a little girl we lived in what was then a country area. Looking at it now it is so close to our capital city that I have to laugh! Anyway, we went barefoot a lot, and I was the youngest of four. I clearly remember that if I stood on a rusty nail my father would give me a shiny new (Australian)penny to take my mind off it. I am now 65, and it is only recently that I have thought about it and realised that he must have cleaned up an old penny to make me feel good.Isn't that wonderful. What a great man he was!
I used to believe that my mother's side of the family and my father's side of the family were all related. So, I'd would be like,"Grandmother (mother's mother) have you seen Grandpapa(father's father) latley?" Even though they had never met!
after watching roald dahl's "the witches" i used to believe my mother and every other female adult were out to eat me... they would all get together and swap recipes and decide whose child to have for dinner next at weekly meetings... i had a plan that upon capturement i would convince them somehow that i too was a witch and that my sister would make for better eating.
I used to believe that my parents were actually aliens. I thought that they wanted to poison me, but since they wouldn't want to poison my little brother they couldn't. I was afraid to eat anything that my mom made just for me.
My sister once told me that my parents went to a cabbage patch and found me next to a rock. She told me the only reason they picked me was because the cabbage next to me was rotten so they had no choice. For years I thought it was true and that my parents resented me for not being ripe cabbage. Every time my parents made cabbage I would get really upset and they didn't know why. They thought it was because I didn't like eating cabbage and it wasn't until years later that they connected the dots and realized why I freaked out over cabbage.