grown-ups: family

I thought that once the parents of an older teenager determined that their child had learned all of the skills required to be an adult, they would tell their son or daughter, "Now you are on your own." On that day, the child would become an adult and no longer had to live with their parents or obey them. I think this belief came from a commercial where a father and son were roping calves and the father sent the son out "on his own" to do the job by himself.

First off i was a weird little child but this one stands out to me... i was around 5 or 6 and my mom had a close friend who had cancer so she would wesr wigs. They all got a kick out of me singing and dancing for them. Well one night they had an award ceremony for me and i gave an acceptance speech. I thanked my mom and everyone and then i told the friend thank you for being a great prostitute. ....lmao i thought that word sounded very important and professional lol they laughed their asses off and i stared at them like wtf lol

One time my mom was watching a baby that used cloth diapers and, being like 4, I swear she took off like 20 layers of clothing to access his mess!

i used to believe that my parents were government spies that were in high tech disguises and reported to offices in other dimensions. i also used to believe that everyone i knew had access to a live feed of every single thing i did, including going to the bathroom and bathing, and judged me on my looks and behavior. AND one last thing. i grew up in a shomer shabbos (we kept the sabbath in the orthodox jewish tradition) house and was convinced that everyone i knew was involved in an elaborate hoax to make me think is was sunday when it was really saturday and therefore i was breaking the sabbath

when i was 4 i believed that all girls were left handed and all boys were right handed it made sense becoz my mum and my older sister and me where left handed and my dad and my older brother where right handed.

I used to believe that parents were always taller than their kids. So when my grandma came over I never believed that she was my mom's mom because my grandma was the smaller one.

Once when I was around four or five, an older relative of mine told me I was so cute that he could "just fold me up in his pocket and keep me there". I'm still not sure what that means, but it terrified me as a kid because a pocket would be a terrible place to live!

When I was about 5 years old, I used to think that I swim very well. My father said that I was a successful swimmer. After many years, I saw my childhood photo and I realized I wasn' t swimming too good. Actually, I was swimming on the shore of the sea.

When I was about 5 years old, I used to think that I swim very well. My father said that I was a successful swimmer. After many years, I saw my childhood photo and realized I wasn' t swimming too good. Actually, I was swimming on the shore of the sea.

When I was a little kid, I was convinced that the place my mother went to get her hair "done" was the Beauty Saloon. I imagined everybody's mother sitting around in curlers, having drinks at a bar!

When I was little, my mother told me that she would swap me for another little boy every time I 'misbehaved', I always had this mental image of a supermarket-like store which sold children.

When I asked my dad why my grandpa divorced my grandma and married another woman, he told me that my grandpa realized that he had married the wrong person.

I understood that too literally.

For a very long time, I thought my grandpa mistook my grandma for another woman whom he had met before her.

Whenever we drove by the flashing red light from an antenna my dad said it was taking a picture. He always told me to smile. I use to smile for years until I figured it out. Still whenever I think about it when I see one I laugh snd still smile.

Whenever my sisters and I were being bad my mom would threaten that "Helga" was going to come babysit us. This so called babysitter was described as a horrid woman and we were terrified of her. As soon as she was mentioned we'd turn into little angles. The story of Helga kept us behaved for years.

I have an Aunt Joanne. I used to think she was the owner of every Jo-Ann's Fabrics in existence. I later learned there were other Jo-Anns in the world--who knew?

My parents have the same birthday (but my father is a year older than my mother), so I automatically assumed that ALL parents had the same birthday. When we went to a neighbors house for their birthday, I couldn't understand why it was only one person's birthday, and not both. It took me a good two hours to realize that most people's parents don't have the same birthday.