grown-ups: marriage

When I was little I used to think that when you were ready to get married you went to this big room and just picked the man you wanted. I always thought I would pick Dr. Kildare.

When I was about 10 or 11 I was playing house with a couple of other girls. Of course we had to make up stories about where our husbands were because they weren't around. One girl said her cousin had a baby without being married; the other friend knew this was "bad". I thought about it for several days before I decided that God had made a mistake and given the cousin and her boyfriend a baby because they were so much in love and He hadn't realized they weren't married.

I used to believe when I was seven that I would one day marry Macauley Culkin and even acted out the wedding with my best friend Robyn pretending to be Macauley - it goes without saying that we didn't share the man and wife kiss at the end: that would have been too weird!

My son and I were in a friend's bridal party when he was a few months shy of his third birthday - his job was to walk the flower girl, Nicole, down the aisle. About six months later, we were watching a movie when a wedding scene came on - he pointed to the TV and said, "Look Mommy! That looks just like when I married Nicole!".

My sister (again) when she was 5 thought that the man had to be fat and the woman skinny when they got married. This was because all the wed couples she had seen fitted this category. So when she saw one couple were the reverse was true (woman fat, man skinny) she thought that the mariiage would probably fail.

And when I wrote this, she corrected "fat is spelled 'phat'". Oh my, the gangsta generation.

When I was around 5, I heard my mom talking about going to a bridal shower with some other ladies, and I was picturing all these women in the shower together!! I was quite disturbed and was glad I wasn't going.

I used to believe that when you wanted to get married, you would put on your tux, and walk around until you found a woman in a wedding dress, and then you'd be married.

I used to think that once you get married life would be happy ever after, and that Prince Charming really did exist.

My parents were both twenty when they got married. I thought for sure that I would be married when I was twenty, and that all nice people were.

When I was little, I was watching a television show in which the teenage
daughter was pregnant. I remember thinking, "That's stupid, you can't be
pregnant if you aren't married!" My parents, of course, had told me that
being married was a prerequisite of having children, and I took that
literally.

i used to think that it was a law that people with the same color hair had to get married to in order to ensure that their children had the right color hair. this was corroborated that both i and my parents have dark brown hair. i was very confused when a friend of mine had dark hair but his mother was a blonde.

Sis and I used to dress up and play 'wedding ceremony' when we were little girls. My mother told us that one time, we came down the hall singing 'dun-dun-de-dun' and both (BOTH!) dressed up as the bride and each carrying a baby. When she asked us how in blurry heck we could already be carrying babies (let alone both of us being brides), I spoke up and told her I knew how to get a baby. Horrified, my mother asked, "How?" and I blurted right out that "You go to the hospital and lay down on the table and scream really good. If you scream good enough the doctor will go down the hall and bring you a baby."

At the age of 5, I was chosed to be the flower girl for my Aunt Margaret. I was very concerned the night of the Wedding Rehearsal... when I heard the Pastor talk about "biting love".

I wanted to get my dear Aunt out of there, and away from that bad man that was telling her husband-to-be to bite her!!!

Once when I was 2 my mom and dad were going to attend a wedding (and leave me and my sister with a babysitter.) I thought they were going to their OWN wedding, and for years and years after that I thought that was when they had gotten married.

I read a book once, as a kid, in which someone who was marrying someone else said "he's dark-haired and I'm blonde. Admirable". As a result, I thought that this was the best possible arrangement, while marriages in which both parties were blonde or brunette were somehow inferior, and marriages between blonde men and brunette women were perfectly impossible.

I used to believe that everyone involved in a marriage was "the bride", and that as long as you were present, you could be called "the bride". Eventually I understood that men were called something else, and they were called "Brooms". I was dumb.