workShow most recent or highest rated first. Common beliefs in this section include:
- Firemen start fires.
- Getting fired means being set on fire.
- You can be literally anything you want - animal, vegetable or mineral
when i was 10 years old, i, unlike most girls my age, decided that i wanted to go into outer-space, and i let everyone i met know about it.
i had just been given the "birds and the bees" lecture by my mother on periods and where babies come from. soon after that, my horrable older brother told me that women that went into outer-space needed to have their ovaries and uterus removed so that they didn't get their period, or have babies in space. i imageined that getting my ovaries and uterus removed would be a terrably painful opperation and so i gave up my dream of going into outer-space and then said that i was going to be a cloud when i grew up.
when I was a kid my parents went thru two ordealing dramas constantly, paying bills, balancing the checkbook and doing taxes, growing up I learned this was all unnecessary hype and no big thing - just a bunch of numbers addded together ,without any hesitation....
I was a precocious child who wanted to do everything, no matter how difficult. I most desperately wanted to be a doctor, but not just any doctor. When adults would ask me what I wanted to be when I grew up I would loudly proclaim, "An oral surgeon!" I couldn't understand why every grown-up just laughed. I thought "oral" meant "every type of surgery known to man." How could someone not take such a noble profession seriously?!
I used to believe that work would end. All the adults - like my mom and dad - were working. All the time. And they must be working toward something. Some goal. And when they were done, we would all just relax.
Me and my sister used to think that my dad owned all the Toms Restaurants because his name was Tom.
We also used to think that our mom's job was to hand out suckers at the bank because everytime we went there that was the only thing that we focused on. ;)
My friend's grandpa was in the Navy. He would always go on the boat. When she was young, she thought hewas a fisherman!!!
In the musical Fiddler On The Roof, for years I thought a 'matchmaker' was a person in a town who made matches for a living...Couldn't understand why anyone would do that for a living. I finally saw the musical in high school and hit my forehead mid act, 'duhhhh!'
my dad told me that all lawers were sharks so whene i met with one with my dad and when i still belived it at 5 i screamed at the top of my lungs DON'T EAT ME!!! and threw up
My father worked for GE, I thought all GE did was make light bulbs. I didn't realize that he was an engineer for GE, until I told my family to leave him alone, that he was tired from making light bulbs all day.
In elementary school, I believed that every day, kids went to school and adults went to work, which meant the streets would be empty. I was shocked when I had to go to the doctor one day and saw cars out on the road. I thought for sure all these people must be playing hooky from work.
I used to belive that my dad didn't really have a job and when he was out he was actually spying on me from behind the door! Somedays id walk about the house saying "come out dad! i know your here!!!"
i used to think a prostitute was a name for a rank in the army
My dad used to play in a band when I was younger and whenever anyone would ask me where my daddy worked I would tell them his job was to go shake his booty.
When we would have firedrills the firemen would come tot he school to see how long it would take them to get there.I used to be afraid of them and when the teachers said d'ont be afraid of the nice firement. but itf its not a firemen just kick them were the sun dont shine!" I would soemtimes get them confused when i saw them cuz some of the firefighters woudlknt wear uniforms so i ended up kicking a firefighter!
Every morning before my dad would leave for work he would tell me that he was off to make some money. I really thought that he spents his days at a machine creating pennies, nickels, dimes, and quarters.
I used to believe that "when i was an adult" in a past life i was a food taster!
When I was little my dad got a job as a dispatcher at the local police station. Until I was about 6 I believed that he was a "ditch patcher" and thought he fixed holes in ditches. Even visiting him at work didn't dispel my visions of him filling in holes with dirt from a bucket.
I used to think that the graveyard shift was men that dug graves at night.
Apparently my Father spent WWII riding a flat footed polar bear across the Sahara Desert pressing pants. They were white to reflect the sun, insulated to keep cool like a cooler, and the flat feet prevented them from sinking into the sand.
I've always had a fetish for jewelry. When I was a child, I noticed that all of the cashiers at the grocery store had rings on. I thought that the rings were part of the uniform given to them. I told my mom that I wanted to be a cashier when I grew up so that I could have lots of rings too.