workShow most recent or highest rated first. Common beliefs in this section include:
- Firemen start fires.
- Getting fired means being set on fire.
- You can be literally anything you want - animal, vegetable or mineral
Whenever the phrase "graveyard shift" or "working graveyard" was used when I was a kid, I always assumed it entailed working outside at night, maybe not necessarily in a real graveyard, but any sort of creepy environment with a lot of digging. I think it stems from growing up in a mining town and picturing a bunch of guys somberly digging for ore and stuff with shovels in the middle of the night. I wasn't very swift as you can probably tell.
i used to believe that my parents (who are reasonably successful in the advertising business) had have second jobs in the local wimpy bar in order to support me and my brother. this was because my dad used it to try and make me and my brother to go to bed early so they could "get to work".
i dont know what age i was but i was sure that being superman was a job and i was dertermined that thats what i was going to do when i grew up.i think i even practised for awhile so id have an advantage over everyone else who wanted to do it.
When i read in shops 'alcohol will not be served to minors', i used to think that all miners were banned from drinking.
From the ages of 2-8 my Dad worked away In Saudi Arabia.
I lived in a small village in Wales, UK, and my house overlooked a mountain that had a small coal mine on it.My mum told me was Saudia was that mountain and my dad was drining teh lorry that i could se etehlights of. Every night i waved goodnight to my dad working on the mountain!
I used to think that "moonlighting" was being a private detective, just like Cybil Shepard's TV series. Once, my mom and I bumped into one of my teachers at a department store (which, btw, I thought was impossible because teachers didn't have personal lives. I figured that in their free time, they sat at home and read books.), and when I asked my mom what she was doing there, she said that she thought she was moonlighting. My mom also told me to be quiet about it because my teacher could get into trouble if people at school found out (although, at this age, I don't think that qualified as violating a noncompetition agreement). I immediately translated this into her being a private detective, plus the fact that I was supposed to keep it hush-hush, so the next day I ran into school and told all my little friends that our teacher was a spy!
When my mom used to say dad went to work to get money, I imagined my dad standing at this large counter filling out checks
and stuff like that.
My cousin lives on a farm, however her parents are not farmers, that side of the business is looked after by employees. When she was little, she came home from school upset. Her parents asked what was wrong. She exclaimed to her father and mother -
"You're not a *real* farmer, and you're not a farmer's wife!"
She believed that they should look like what you see in story books, gumboots, pitchforks, aprons, and pies cooling on windowsills.
I liked cats so much I wanted to be a Vet when I grew up, but, I thought they couldn't eat meat.
I would leave some blank pages in my coloring book - thinking that the trash man would take it home to his children
Whenever I asked my father what he did at work, he always responded "I make money." (He was an insurance claims adjuster, so I can see why he couldn't explain that to a 4 year old!). However, I pictured him going to a factory and actually printing money to take home and spend. We were lucky no one ever turned him in for counterfeiting, since that's basically what I told everyone my dad did!
I thought that an ambassador was simply someone who wore a tuxedo, top hat, and a monocle, and held a cane.
When I was a little kid, I went with my mom to the paint store and was fascinated by all the different colors of paint samples, each with their own mysteriously descriptive name. I asked Mom where they got the names for all these colors, and she replied that it was somebody's job. I was elated to find my future profession! I would be a color-namer.
This would of course be the GREATEST job in the world, but as of yet I haven't found any available positions.
I thought that Doctors never got sick and that's why they could cure other people. My godfather was a Doctor and I always admired him for that ability. I grew up wanting to be a Doctor myself, which I eventually became ... and funny as it may seem, I treat sick patients every day, but I hardly ever get sick!
my father is an electical engineer, but as a young child i believed whole hearted that my father drove a train.
When I heard my own heart beating in my ears as I laid in bed, I tho't it was the sound of my father's footsteps coming in from his second shift job.
My mother used to refer to one's bowel movements as "business"; e.g. "Hurry up on the toilet, I've got to do some business." Therefore, I drew the natural conclusion that when my uncle "went to Hong Kong on business" that he actually slid there on a turd.
I wanted to be a fireman when I was around the age of... 5 or 6, I guess. My 2 years younger sister objected; Then I couldn't be the uncle of her children!
When I'd ask my dad what he did at work, he'd say he "made money." So for a long time, I thought he carved out Lincoln's head on the pennies and used a machine to cut up the dollar bills.
I didn't undrestand why my mother would say that something was too expensive. When you need money you go to the bank and pick some up, right? Right? RIGHT?
Later I decided that the best work was probably being a cashier at a grocery store, I assumed they got to take the money they collected as payment for food home at the end of the day.