workShow most recent or highest rated first. Common beliefs in this section include:
- Firemen start fires.
- Getting fired means being set on fire.
- You can be literally anything you want - animal, vegetable or mineral
I used to think that when you got fired, you got shot. My friend Scott told me his father was fired, and I was quite sad for him. I got the shock of my life when I saw his father walking around perfectly healthy a few days later.
When I was asked by my kindergarten teacher about what I want to grow to be. I said, "well I suppose any communist job is okay with me". I thought opposite of famous was communist. And I really did not want to become a famous person like a politician, scientist, attorney, etc... because they had to complete more years of school.
Thanks to my dad, for the first 10 years of my life I believed that C.I.D (Criminal Investigation Department) stood for "Constable In Disguise"
When I was little I used to believe that all books were handwritten and to be an author you had to have perfect handwriting. I also thought that if you wrote a book you had to write out every single copy ever sold.
When I was 10 years old, I used to believe that the accountants always counted money all the time.
For a while I wanted to be a animal trainer for films. Id seen Mary Poppins and thought it was so cool how somebody had got the robin to sit on her finger and sing along with her.
Eventually I forgot about this ambition, until many years later I was watching Mary Poppins with my family. Along came the robin, and I felt a surge of loss to see it was clearly animatronic (and oversized). I complained that I was CERTAIN the robin had been real.
My family now point out any animatronic or CIG animal on TV and tell me it's not real. I'm 18.
(although there ARE animal trainers for TV.... just not for the animal I thought :( )
As a child, I overheard my mom talking with someone about an acquaintance who got fired, and literally took it to mean that people who do a bad job get killed by being thrown into a fire. For a while I was terrified of what would happen if I wasn't good at my job when I grew up
My Dad used to operate machines at work. The only machines I knew of were slot machines so I was of the belief that Dad played bandits all day to make a living.
When I was younger I thought that when someone got the sack they were put into a great big sack and the top was tied. Then there was 'custody' - getting thrown into a huge vat of custard. It took me years to work out the truth...
i used to think taxi drivers were nice people who gave you a ride, told you loads of nice stories, showed you round cities and gave dad and mum money at the end of the ride
I used to belive that my dad didn't really have a job and when he was out he was actually spying on me from behind the door! Somedays id walk about the house saying "come out dad! i know your here!!!"
When I was younger I believed that "Help Wanted" meant that you had to go to prison, and help the criminals...Boy, was I upset when my brother applied for a job!
When I was about six, my cousin told me that a stipper was a dancer, like a ballerina. When ever anyone would ask me what I wanted to be when I grew up I would respond with "I want to be a stripper!" Needless to say, they still haven't let me live that one down.
My father, who was on crutches, would always holler at us "Get the door". One day I asked my mother, "Does daddy call work and tell him he is on his way, or does he just stand outside until someone comes along and opens the door for him?" I was very surprised when she said he could open the door himself, for I had never seen him do it.
My Dad was an area manager for a shoe firm, and my sister Stephanie (aged about 9) announced that when she grew up she wanted to be a manageress. My name is Paula, and when I heard this (aged about 5) I informed my father that if she was going to be a "manager S" then I was going to be a "manager P"
When I was little, I thought that mannaquiens were real people who's job it was to stay still all day to show off the store's clothes. So, whenever someone asked me what I wanted to be when I grew up, I would reply by saying "a mannaquien." I got some very strange looks :)
I used to think that lollymen ladies actually gave out lollypops.
I remember being disappointed, having crossed the road sucessfully and not recieved confectionery.
I used to think that blow-jobs happened when you got fired from a job
when i was little, my mother was vice president of a bank. i went to her work when there was a kiddie carnival event and she was working the hot dog stand. from then on whenever anyone asked me what my mother did, i told them "she sells hot dogs at the bank.
I thought that since my lock on my door said Lock Smith that there was a little man named Smith who unlocked the doors for us. I would stick little bits of cheese in the door to feed him as a treat for letting us in.