kids

When I saw ads for toys that said "batteries not included" I thought it meant that the toy didn't need batteries to work. When I asked my parents for a toy I would ad "batteries not included" as a selling point, becuase then they wouldn't have to buy batteries.

I still hang onto the "toys have feelings" thing... and I'll be 24 in March. I know better now but... can't help it. Jessie's Song (She Used to Love Me) in Toy Story 2 must have darn near killed you. Well, I almost lost it, anyway.

When I was three to six years old or so, I used to believe that my toys had feelings. When it was night time, I would stack as many toys in bed with me and cover them up so they would not get cold. At the store, I would pick the stuffed bear with one eye because I knew the other kids would not pick him and that he was sad because he was different. I didn't think they could move or talk, but I was scared it would hurt their feelings if mom threw them away. I also thought crayons had genders. Red, yellow, orange and pink were girls. Green, blue, purple, brown and black were boys. Go figure. (I also knew which letters of the alphabet were boys and which ones were girls.)

I firmly believed my stuffed animals were alive. I would often burst into my bedroom, trying to catch them in the act of talking or moving. Some of them even got haircuts - being alive, the hair would grow back. Probably the weirdest result of my imagination was that I didn't give my toys names - they already had their own names, I just didn't know them because they never spoke when I was around.

When I was a little girl, I firmly believed that at night when I slept, the dolls in my doll house woke up and conducted their lives. This belief also applied to all my stuffed animals.

I used to & still do to a certain extent believe that I was the ONLY person in the world & I was a prototype human being evaluated, observed at all times and tested to see how I reacted to general life situations and that everyone else was a machine who only became active if I was within a certain radius of them & that once out of that radius just switched off...weird or what...or is that just what they want me to say...mmmmmmmm
Needless to say it freaked me out quite a few times when I thought too deeply about it.

As a ploy to keep us from putting small rubber toys in our mouths, our parents told us that toys were made out of boogies. I imagined a toy factory, where the workers picked their noses...

When I was little, I believed that my stuffed animals came alive when I left the room. So I always made sure that there were two of them together so they wouldn't be lonely. Too much watching Raggedy Ann I guess! Imagine my surprise when Toy Story came out and the toys came to life when the kids left the room!!

I used to believe that if I wanted a certain new toy all I had to do was find something that was the same color as the toy I wanted and throw it in front of the lawn mower when my dad mowed the lawn. He would mow over it and the new toy I wanted would pop out the back of the lawn mower.
My dad used to yell at me everytime I tried to throw something in the path of the lawn mower.

I believed I was magickal because I never caught poison ivy, but when my sister and I had played in it by accident she would get rashes and I wouldn't. Then "immunity" was a vocabulary word at school.

I believed that the world was a fake world and that I was the subject of some huge study. My parents were in cahoots with the board of scientists who manipulated this fake world to observe my reactions. I believed that my milk was drugged every night so that I would sleep soundly and not discover their weird plot.

when i was a lil kid, like between 3 and 5, i used to think my toys would come alive when ever i wasnt around. so i would go to extreme measures to try and catch them in the act. one time i took all my toys that looked like they could come alive out to the livingroom and sat them in front of the tv. then i hid a tape recorder in my room and pressed record. then i brought them all back in my room and left them alone for the whole day. i would also do things like leaving the room, then bursting back in to try and catch them in the act, or listening through the door or wall w/ a cup or a toy stethascope.

I used to believe that the stuffed animals at the stores would be put through a shredder machine if they weren't bought. When my mother would tell me "You may choose one," I would agonize tearfully over the decision of which one would get to live and which I would abandon to torment and death. Often I'd pick the toy I wanted least, feeling that nobody else would want it either and it would be the first to be killed. I could almost hear them all crying "Don't leave me here..."

When I was around 4 or 5, I used to believe that only I could think, and being so very special and very very religious, I also believed that since there was a Son of God, I could possibly be the Daughter of God. BIG delusions of grandeur!

My parents told me that I was born with a tail. I believed them. Forever.
(I guess it got lobbed off sometime). I always imagined it to be like a dinosaur tail--they probably meant something cute like a cat tail.

When I was a kid, I used to believe I was batgirl and that I could fly. Learned out the hard way that I really wasn't, when I put on my cape, climbed on top of the bathroom sink and dove head first into the tub... cracking my skull open. OUCH that hurt!

I used to believe that I could move faster than my shadow. I would quickly switch directions thinking I could fake it out and catch it for whatever it was. To this day for some reason every now and then I still try it. I'm 23.

When I was little I used to have about fifty dolls in my room. I used to believe that when the rest of the family, and I would fall asleep all of my dolls would come to life, and live there lives as we do ours. And when I would wake up in the morning they would all pretend to just be dolls, when in actuallity they were just little people.