language

I used to believe…

When I was 4 years old, a rumor was going around the kindergarten class about BAD WORDS (we were such naughty little children). A little boy was sitting next to me during story time one day and whispered in my ear "The F word is FORK!" I still don't know if it was fork he said, or the real word, but that's what I heard and for years I didn't use the word because I was afraid I'd get in trouble...

I used to believe…

My family is quite religious. Every Sunday my Dad, my sister and I would go to church together (we're Catholics) but my Mum always went to a different church (she's a Protestant). When I was little nobody actually told me what religion my Mum was. Eventually I picked up on what it was and got it loged in my mind that she was a prostitue (see the likeness???).
Come Christmas time my entire family (you know Granny, Grandpa, Uncle X, Auntie Y, Cousin Z) were about to leave for midnight mass. But my mum wasn't coming. So my grandad asked me "Why isn't your Mummy coming to church with us?" and so I replied loudly and proudly "Because she's a PROSTITUTE!".

I used to believe…

Iused to believe that if I sweared, the devil would climb up a rope from Hell and taunt me... My parents made me believe this, saying I was calling for the devil if I sweared.
If sure worked, but for yeasr I was scared half to death every time someone sweared

I used to believe…

as a kid i had apparently heard the word dodo somewhere, probably on tv, but i had a terrible habit of mixing my words up....so imagine my mums surprise when, during a fight with my neighbour, i screamed "your a dildo!!" at the top of my lungs. i called people that for years, and never realised why adults looked at me funny when i did!

I used to think that the multiplication table on the back of my notebook was a calendar. I used to cross off the days until I noticed that it would become a smaller date. I assumed it was another month then.

I thought one month had 144 days, but the days went by very randomly (12, 24, 36..)

I used to believe…

When I was in 4th grade my friend told me about the a-word. I believed it was part of another word, "missile", as in a rocket. Looking back, I think I must have been thinking of a**hole, but somehow the idea of a mean rocket got lodged in my brain.

i used to belive that a german sheperd dog could only understand german and , chows could only understant chinese. so you could imagine my confusion when we got a mixed bread dog(german sheperd?chow). i cried and was upset for about a month thinking that my dog would never understand what i said to him.i soon got over this when i told him to sit down and he did.(then again i also thought that i had just invented a new language.

I used to believe…

My brother used to pronounce truck as "Fruck" which sounded more like another word to some people. we would ask him all the time - "whats that over there? Say truck!" and mom would get so mad

I used to believe…

When i was little (3 or 4) I watched sesame street religously.. One day my parents asked me to count to ten for them so I started "One,ah ah ah ah , two, ah ah ah ah" and so on.. apparently i thought you had to laugh after every number just as the Count on Sesame Street does.

I used to believe…

When we were in English class, my friend told me that they took the word gullible out of the dictionary. Well, that's all it took to convince me. But, later I went to look for it and, of course, it was still in there!

I used to believe…

When I was little I used to think that when you counted the numbers went 1,2,3,4,5,6,7,8,9,10---- then 11-19 was replaced with one-ty like twenty or thirty. It went ten, onety-one, onety-two, onety-three... and so on!

I used to believe…

one day, a long time ago, me and my older brother were in a fight. I was only like six then and I couldn't think of any good names to call him, so I decided to think of a silly made-up name. The first one that came to mind was f*****. I didnt even know the word! I just made it up!! So I called him that and everyone gasped and I got in trouble!! I tried to explain that I didn't know! lol!

I used to believe…

When I was 4 I thought the word "zit" was actually "dazit" and I used to tease my aunt about hers all the time. Now she gets her paybacks and teases me about my "dazits."

I used to believe…

One time when I was about 6 I think,I was sitting in the back seat of the car and this other car filled with teenagers pulled up beside us.They looked over at me and they were smiling and then one of them flipped me off but of course back then I didn't know what it meant so I just smiled and did the same thing back and I'm pretty sure I did it wrong because they all started laughing even harder.To tell you the truth I just thought it was their way of saying what's up,or something.

I used to believe…

One day, a teacher of mine told the class that she overheard a couple with a newborn talking about the baby.
She told us the mother said, "I'm glad we're not Chinese."
The father goes "Why?"
The mother says, "Because if we were, we would have to teach the baby Chinese."
The father believed the mother.

Wow. That. Is. Sad.

I used to believe…

when i was little i used to think that an appetizer was called lingerie, and that lingerie was an appetizer, so once i saw my mom maken like shrimps, and dips and such and i was like: "mom nice lingerie!"