language

I used to believe…

When I was a kid, I just couldn't understand why we were human beans. We weren't long and green and stringy and we didn't look terribly edible...it was an enormous mystery to me...

I was always in trouble in one form or another, and hated having to apoligize. One day I decided that I'd get all my "I'm sorrys" out of the way and skipped around our neighborhood singing 'I'm sorry' over and over again so I wouldn't have to say it what I was angry. Too bad that one didn't work.

I used to believe…

As I matured and reached the fourth grade or so, I began to hear guys calling one another "son of a bitch." Intrigued, I asked my dad the meaning of "bitch."

"A bitch is an old lady dog," Dad said.

"What's so bad about 'an old lady dog'?" I thought. Being on the receiving end of the epithet never bothered me for years thereafter.

I used to believe…

When I was six I didn't know about carrying numbers (who does?). I thought that 66 + 66 = 1212 and proceeded to write this and many other incorrect equations on a piece of paper. My dad told me that was wrong but I argued with him about it.

I used to believe…

When I was about 4 I decided that if you were born in a bigger year, that meant you were older. So if I was born in 1965, that meant I was older than someone born in 1964. Because 65 is bigger than 64. Just like being 4 years old was bigger than being 3 years old.

I used to believe…

l-m-n-o-p was one letter

I used to think the phrase "throwing caution to the wind" was "throwing cosh into the wind." Whatever cosh was. I think i thought it was some kind of grain.. a type of couscous maybe.

I used to believe…

For a while I thought that volcano was ballcano - which seemed feasible seeing as they chucked out great balls of fire.

I used to believe…

When I was very little, I couldn't understand what the grown-ups were always talking about. I hadn't learned to speak properly yet.
I remember thinking back then: "Oh no, do I have to learn that awfull dificult language one day?", or something of that kind.
Looking back on it, it was kinda funny, since I work with languages now.
:-)

I used to believe there were only three directions: north, south, eastnwest. I would argue with my mother when she tried to tell me that east and west were two separate directions,"But my teacher SAID!"

I used to believe…

wen i was younger and just grasping the whole reading concept and id been taugh if u didnt know a word to say it how it was spelt, when reading a menu i became baffled by the word meringue and for ages pronounced it mirengoo coz my mum didnt have the heart to tell me i read it wrong!!!!!

I was a horrible speller during elementary school (still am). I remember being very upset with my mother because she didn't convey to me that the word "together" was spelled To-Get-Her.
After I learned that it was spelled that way I thought it meant that.

I used to read to my younger neighber and make up words while doing so. I convinced her that once she learned to read she would understand what I was saying. I couldn't read either at the time, but I thought I was right.

I used to believe…

Back in the day, we used to refer to losing a game as getting "creamed." Unfortunately, I got it in my head that losing really badly was to get "cremated." So I would run around yelling "OOOH, you guys just got cremated."

I used to mix up the words orgasm and organism.So once , on vacation I felt like writing some sort of a horrortale.I started this story with "I went deeper into the woods , and all of a sudden an orgasm appeared from behind a tree...".I didn't realise why my mother started laughing all at once...: )

I used to believe…

When growing up in New Orleans I remember my parents saying the "Surgeon Water Board"....I didn't realize until I was an adult and actually looked at a man whole cover that it was the Sewerage and Water Board....well they have the Surgeon General of the U.S. right?