language

I used to think (for an embarrassingly long time!)that FAQ meant For Any Questions, because that was what people said they would leave time for at the end of a presentation.

I used to believe…

When I was little, I watched Cruella DeVil on 101 dalmations call her minions "morons". I didn't know what that meant, so I looked it up in the dictionary. It said something like "an adult with the mentality of a 12 year old".
I got in a bit of trouble when, after a boy in my class did well on a test, I kindly called him a moron. Being 8, I thought this was a compliment of the highest sort, saying he was as smart as a 12 year old.

I used to believe that fire drills were real drills and there were also drills for grapes or monkeys and even mutant mole people.Boy was I dumb!

I used to believe…

When i was little, i watched sesame street alot, and they would do a number song in spanish. Well, i must have miss understood them, because for the longest time i would sing, Uno, dos, tres, CUATHRO... my mom tried to correct me but i argues with her because thats what i thought i heard!

I used to believe that sticking up your middle finger meant 'I hate you', something we weren't ever allowed to say in our house. So when I was feeling naughty, I would stick my middle finger up at dilapidated old houses from the backseat of the car as we drove by (and then feel horribly guilty).

I used to believe…

There aws this swear word and i didnt no what it was my frend sed it was condom and i only found out wen i was older!

Also we had this Russian person at our school, and my frend sed that vodka was a russian swear word and my dad sed something about vodka then he told me it was a drink! lol

I used to believe…

When I was young I always called Darth Vaider from Star Wars Dark Vaider.People must have thought I was a nut!

I grew up in a ranching/farm family. One time we were running cattle through a chute to put fly spray on their backs and one kicked me through the fence. I was outraged and yelled "OW! You cock sucker!" To me a cock was a rooster or chicken and a sucker was a foolish person or an idiot. I thought I was saying you idiot chicken. Even after I got into trouble, I still didn't know why what I said was bad until years later.

I had heard the phrase "the thrill of the hunt" for quite sometime, thinking each time I was hearing "Attila the Hun". People were saying for example, what someone did for "the thrill of the hunt". I wondered why someone was doing the thing in question for Attila the Hun. In time I finally figured out the phrase "the thrill of the hunt".

I used to believe…

In 2nd grade, I didn't know what jerk off meant. I thought it was a worse term for jerk, but not a curse word, so I could use it. So I would run around the schoolyard calling people jerk offs and having no clue what it really meant...

I used to believe…

My friend told me that in Spanish Cavron(?) meant beautiful flopwer and that Pendejo meant cute puppy. So I went to my friend that I liked and I was all like "Cavron, you look like a Pendejo!" and then he told me what it meant and i got pissed at my friend who told me that!

I used to believe…

When I was five, I would play my Sega Genesis. On one of my games, the spikes moving up and down sounded like someone was saying f**k. So whenever the spikes popped up I would say f**k. I got slapped for that...

I used to believe that if you would go to an other country and talk about music you would have to translate the band's name into that native language. (i.e. The Doors = Las Puertas)

I used to believe…

One time in Elementary school I was playing ball against the wall and got hit in the eye with a tennis ball. My mom had taken me to the doctor's and he put me in front of an eye chart and asked me to read what was in front of me. He started at the smallest row, I couldn't read anything. As he moved up I kept telling him I couldn't read what was on the line. My mom started to get nervous. My doctor then said "Can't you see any of the letters?" in which I replied "I can read them but I don't know what they're spelling!" (Hey, i was young, no one told me I was supose to say each letter out loud - I thought a worrd was being spelled!)

I went over my friends house one day when I was young and we were talking about school. One of her class assignments was to write about what scared you or something like that and it was due in a few days. So she asked me if it would be bad to put "I don't like spiders. They freak me out" because she thought freak was a swear word.

I used to believe…

When I was young, I thought everyone in the world understood English.