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When I was a kid, I used to think that an oxymoron was a stupid ox.
When I was little, we lived near a catholic church. There was a sign on the sidewalk that said pedestrian crossing, so i used to think that a pedestrian was was what you called a person who went to church.
"When I first saw a metallica shirt I though it said 'Metal-Licka'. I was a stupid child..."
Chester Bennington, Linkin park singer
When I was 6 or 7, I received a children's one-volume encyclopedia. At the end of some entries, it would suggest that you "Look Up" a related subject. I could not understand why the book wanted me to look up. I tried staring at the ceiling but nothing happened.
In most magzines aimed at kids, they have sections, where they publish drawings, photos, poems, and other stuff that readers did. I didn't know you have to have your parents mail it to the magazine, so I had a drawing and I just stuck it in the magazine and waited for it to appear published on the page.
When I was four, I was very puzzled when I read the word "know." I knew the word when it was said aloud, but took a LONG time to figure out that they were the same word. I thought it was pronounced "ku-NOW" and that it had something to do with Chinese food!
I used to think that "Jabberwocky" was a character from Star Wars.
I used to think that "To Let" signs were meant to say "Toilet", but they were mispelled. I always wondered why they only ever left the "I" out and not any other letters.
I grew up not far from the local train tracks. My friends and I would lay on the slope leading up to the tracks and would count the cars as they went by. I remember going home one day and asking my Grandmother where Capa City was. It was written on all of the box cars. We got out the altas and searched, but found nothing.
Not long after that, we got stuck in the car at the RR crossing. When the box cars starting rolling by, I showed her where it said they were all from Capa City.
She began to laugh so hard, she had to turn around to go home and change her pants.
What I was reading as Capa City, was actually "capacity"...as in maximum volume.....Ooooooohhhh!
Hey, I was 7!
I believed that there were two n's in the alphabet. I asked my teacher in kindergarten because to me it went... L M N O P Q R S T U V W X Y *N* Z (because of the AND Z).
My mom was a high school English teacher. She used to have a book in the house entitled, "Writing With a Purpose" and for some reason I thought it read, "Writing with a Porpoise". I couldn't understand why she was having her students study about Porpoises in English class.
I thought "The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy" was a somewhat casual manual for astronauts.
I used to believe that the word: 'several" meant "seven". I only realised the error when I was 17yrs old. Now just imagine how many tests I messed up, purely because of 1 word.
My kindergarden teacher used to read to us, and someone asked, "Why can't we read by ourselves?" I wondered the same thing. She said that we wouldn't be able to do that until we were older because we couldn't 'hear the words in our head'. I thought that you'd have to read outloud for a long time, like 5 years!
I used to believe that I could only borrow books from the library that had a 'P' on the spine, because that was my first initial. My mum thought I was a slow learner, since I brought home the same series of books about a monkey every time we had library class. I don't know why I thought this.
When I was little and learnign to read, I used to believe that chaos was pronounced "Chaa-Ose."
From the time I first learned to read until perhaps the fourth grade I thought if you parked your car illegally it would be blown up, because that's what the sign said:
When my mom and I drove to a local Wal-Mart she said if I went in with her I would get a free lolly-pop. She had to make a deposit to the bank in there and they usually gave littler kids lolly-pops. I was in fact a little kind and I was just learning to read. On the outside ity said "Low Prices." For the longest time I thought it said lolly-pops, but they didn't know how to spell. I never did get my lolly in the end.
As a little girl I had a favorite book about a dog who was left alone in a house while his family was away for vacation. In the story the dog is sad and cries because he has been left behind. I would cry everytime my Great Grandpa read the book to me. I would have him read it every day hoping the dog would get to go with his family and then when the book didnt change I would cry.
I thought the book "Ramona Quimby, Age 8" was only for kids eight years old and up. I was highly offended by the ageism.