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From the time I first learned to read until perhaps the fourth grade I thought if you parked your car illegally it would be blown up, because that's what the sign said:
When ever someone said ''read aloud'' I assumed aloud was the title of a book. Lol.
When I was in first grade (1995) I had read the book "Shiloh" (Bad idea). After reading it, I was terrified Judd Travers (Bad guy from the story) would come into my house and shoot my beagle. I belived this until 3rd grade, when I realized it was just a story.
My dad is in the Navy and my family goes to the Navel Base a lot. When I just learned how to read, I always thought to myself that we were going to the 'belly-button' base, =)
I used to believe that "sue" meant murder, so in movies when someone is getting sued I got really confused
All through my childhood, there was a commercial for a group called R.I.F (reading is fundamental) The announcer would loudly say "Reading is FUN! Damental!"
I thought they were saying "Reading is fun- The Mental!"
As in, those children with mental disabilities should read, too.
As a kid I loved to read and I would read in bed almost every night. I especially loved books about animals and the natural world with lots of big glossy photos. However I believed that if a book was left open any "bad" creatures such as spiders which were on that page could come out and bite or eat me so I was always careful to close my books up and if there was a photo on the front or back cover I would turn that side face down to the floor.
I used to believe that the notice "Case sensitive" when you put in a password on the computer meant that if I got it wrong, they'd take me to court. I'd always check twice before I logged in!
I thought "please print" in magazine subscription forms meant you had to put your name with a printer instead of writing it without cursive!
When I first encountered "lb.", I had no concept of abbreviations and would read it aloud, "lib". So Dick and Jane would go to the store to get two libs of butter...
It's not really something I misheard in a song but there is a song called "You're a grand old flag" or something around that, and we had to play that in my music class and when I first flipped through the music book I thought it said "You're a grand old fag". Even my two friends that were with me in my music class thought it said that.
My friend and I used to read Judy Blume books but we had a bit of trouble understanding some of the American expressions (we're English). First of all, lots of the girls had bangs - we had never heard of this before and thought that it meant big breasts. Secondly, they talked about cuticles - no idea what this meant but it sounded rude. We would have been so disappointed if we had only bothered to use a dictionary. (Actually I only found out about the bangs when I went to university!)
When I was about 9 or 10 I was very into reading the dictionary - my brother (5 years older) must have thought this was kind of geeky and asked me, very seriously, if I knew that the word 'gullible' wasn't in the dictionary - you can see what's coming next can't you?
I used to think that "etc." at the end of a list of items meant electric. I was a very young reader, and since most everything adults did seemed strange, it didn't really occur to me to question such constructions as "dogs, cats, horses, cows, electric"
i thought grown ups read in a different language!
i used to be a bit of a pretensious kid when i was younger, and thought one day that i'd give reading 'don quixote' a go. unsurprisingly i gave up shortly after, but it wasn't until years later that i found out the book wasn't about a bloke called 'don' whose second name was pronounced 'quick-sote'. genius.
There was a game I wanted to play that I thought was called Togg-Ither, but I didn't know how to play it. I read it in a book where it said that the rabbits were playing it.
I was dismayed when my teacher actually told me I had read it wrong, and that the rabbits were playing 'together'.
I used to believe if you read a book in the dark, you would go blind.
When I was about 8 or 9 I loved to read (I still do). My mom said that reading made you smarter so I always had this vision that after each book you read that your brain literally had these little tick marks showing how many books you've read. The more tick marks you have the smarter you are.
From when my parents divorced was when I was able to read with some understanding. This was around the age of 6/7. My parents would send eachother Christmas cards saying Happy 'Xmas' to eachother. I thought that Xmas was a christmas word that ex boyfriends/girlfriends husbands/wives said to eachother.