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I heard the word "pundit" a lot when my parents watched the news, and figured it must be a type of comedian who used puns all the time. I thought it was short for "pun bandit".
I used to believe the world spoke English except for French when I was little boy. I thought only the French spoke French. In the end one day a German spoke to me...
I used to think that the baby slings were called carrions.
When I was little, like 6-7 years old, my dad would sometimes discuss something late at night that I heard as "horse bath".Not really sure why that was a discussion but you never know. -\_(:/)_/- So the next day I went around telling everyone at school that I knew what a "horse bath" was when in reality it was actually "whores bath" and that I had gone around telling everyone I knew about them. Needless to say, I got a good number of calls home and never made that mistake again.
When I was laughing hysterically at something, my mom would ask me "What's so funny that's making you laugh so much like Hanina". I had no idea who "Hanina" really was, but I thought it was the name of some girl that my parents knew who liked laughing a lot. Later, I found out that she meant "laugh like a hyena", not "Hanina", and a hyena was an animal that laughs.
I used to pronounce the word "Computer" as "Crocuta"
I used to think bonsai was a wolf instead of a tree
Nobody in my family has seen The Exorcist so for the longest time, we all thought "The power of Christ compels you" means that the speaker feels compelled to do good because of Christ. The rest of my family still believes that, and I still haven't seen The Exorcist.
When I was little, hearing songs in other languages, I honestly thought they were just making noises with their mouths along with the music. I knew other languages existed but I often found these songs in English dubbed animes so I thought the people that made it English, so I thought the noises that were actually Japanese lyrics, were straight up just noises.
My friend told me that "namreg" was "moron" spelled backwards, and i believed it until my mom said it wasn't
When i was like five, I was convinced that an antelope was something you put letters in.
As a little kid I used to think that gazebos were called "Azibos"(like the character Azibo from Panwapa).
I never saw the word "gazebo" spelled out so the first time i did, I thought it was pronounced "gayz bo" and that it was a separate word from "Azibo", until i tried to draw a picture of one and spell the word below it.
I used to believe that "pathetique" was a fancy way of saying "pathetic". When i said something is pathetic, i said in a fancy voice "Yes, that is soooo pathetique"
i used to think that schadenfreude was a "nazi word" and if you said it, you had to say heil hitler. my older sister loved messing with me, untilr my mom saied that nazi is bad
I used to confuse the words "dive" and "drown" for some reason. Once, me and my sister were swimming in a pool and I told my mom in a rather excited manner: Look, my sister is drowning!
When i was 3, my 10 year old cousin said she had piano lessons and couldn't play with me.
For some reason, i thought that piano was a type of a game you play on a table, like chess or checkers. My cousin was confused when i asked her where the "pinanno"(how i pronounced "piano") game was. Then when i told her she said she had "pinnano" lessons and couldn't come over, she laughed and told me what it really was. I felt stupid.
I never had a piano in my house, only a toy keyboard, so that's probably why i never knew what it was.
I've been deaf all my life. When I was little, I used to feel sorry for people who couldn't speak sign language and had to communicate by moving their mouths into funny shapes. I thought there was something wrong with their hands.
I used to believe that the saying "2 wrongs don't make a right" was "2 wongs don't make a white"
I used to believe that L-M-N-O-P was 1 letter, pronounced elemenopee
I used to think that N was a special letter because it was in the alphabet song twice(L-M-N-O-P and W-X-Y-N-Z)