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When I was little I thought the X-ing sign (like duck x-ing... we have a lot of ducks in our town) was pronounced like Zing. I always wondered why they zinged the ducks.
I used to believe that the Pokémon psyduck was pronounced 'pussy-duck'
Until relatively recently (I think i was about 17 and I'm 25 now) I thought the saying "up and at em" was "up and Adam" since I heard it but never saw it written down.
I was really taken aback when someone told me what "toe jam" actually means. Before that, I had heard the term quite a few times, always thinking it was the name of some rock band.
When I was 8 or 9 there was a very unpleasant girl in my class. She was on my bus and lived at a place called "____ Manor," so I thought that's where they sent the really bad kids to learn their "manners." Every time my parents yelled at me for misbehaving, I thought that they didn't realize how fortunate they were to have me: at least I wasn't so nasty that I had to be sent to a manor!
I used to think the the "gyne" in gynecologist was pronounced like the end of the word "vagina," much to my embarrassment when I had to read it out loud in high school health class.
One summer while my family was visiting my cousin's family, a new family moved into my cousin's neighborhood from Davenport, Iowa. Whether coincidentally or not, it was while playing with my cousin and the new kid from Davenport that I for the first time heard a sofa called a "davenport'. I got thet idea that perhaps in a lot of places people call a sofa by the name of whatever city they are familiar with living in.
For years I heard the word "ostentatious" and thought it was some dialectical pronunciation of "Austin, Texas".
When I started kindergarten, my teacher would call out our full names in class ('Jane Marie Smith' instead of just 'Jane Smith'). For the first week and a half, I did not answer and wondered why she never spoke to me. When she asked my why I never answered her, I explained that she never called my name. A heated argument followed and I went home to tell my mom how crazy my teacher was. I was outraged to find out that my middle name was indeed what the teacher had claimed and was NOT Pumpkin. I quietly apologized to my teacher the next day and have not been called "pumpkin" since.
when i was around 6 I was at school
when it was recess me and my friends were playing with a little rubber octopus.
i stretched out the tentacle's and one broke off
and so i yelled "oh shoot i broke off one of its testicles!"
I meant to say tentacle.
i had no idea what a testicle was .
I Felt so embarrassed after my teachers reaction.
My best friend and i were talking one day and i mentioned that my boyfriend's sister was "as pure as the driven snow". My friend said, "Don't you mean the UN-driven snow? It gets pretty dirty after you drive on it." I guess she thought the phrase meant someone was on longer pure, like snow that has been driven over with a vehicle. I tried not to laugh as i explain that it was driven as is blown by the wind, not driven like a car.
I used to believe that the word 'indie' was a way of saying that something was made in India. Like everytime I heard about indie movies & indie music, I wondered how the heck so many things could be made in India! But then it dawned on me that indie meant independent. XD
I'm a Finn, and I used to believe that everyone in the world understands Finnish. Also when, say, two Englishmen would talk English to each other, they actually hear it as Finnish.
One time, around 4th grade, I got into an argument with a friend. We were trying to decide if it was 'Old Timers Disease' or 'All Timers Disease'. When we asked my friends mother, we found out it was Alzheimer's.
I used to think the shallow end of the pool was the hollow end of the pool.
I thought I invented the word yesterday
I wish to beleive that white Christmast was for white people.
When I was a kid my father had a file holder on his desk that was like a hybrid between a letter rack and a lazy susan. His secretaries would put things in there he needed to deal with immediately.
The first time I ever heard someone say "I'll put that in my circular file" I formed an immediate association with the filing tool on my father's desk and the phrase. Obviously very important things went in the circular file!
Well into my adult life I'd use that phrase in conversation, not realizing I was implying that I would immediately throw the item I had just been given into the trash.
Boss: Ok, this project is critically important.
Me: I'll put it in my circular file right away!
Boss: .... Uhh ....
My family name is pronounced "Wah" and I thought when my parents were talking about a large number of something they were talking about the "'Wah' Zoo," meaning our family or our house. So it was a large amount of something that we had. I was VERY confused when I heard a friend using the term "up the wazoo" in regards to her family . . . I told her she should use the term "Jones's zoo" since that was her last name.
I had a large group of girlfriends with whom I walked to and from elementary school. We always walked in the street because on the sidewalk we had to walk in a line (and it was a small town so traffic was minimal). One day I went home and announced to my mom that we were the "street walkers". She cracked up and then suggested that we come up with a different term to describe ourselves. It was many years before I understood why.