i used to believe

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when i was little i used to think bumble bee was actually pronounced bumbow bee

cathy
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top belief!

I used to think the heimlich manoeuvre was called the heimlich remover. I did not know until about a year ago (when i was 25!) that it was the manoeuvre, my boyfriend still makes fun of me for it.

Anon
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Me and my friend asked her little brother if he knew was gay meant, and he said "yeah, it means like happy."
Hahaha.
It was cute.

Anon
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When I was about seven years old, I found out that the word 'bitch' was the name for a female dog.
Then one day, when I was playing outside with my big brother and his friends, one of them came up to me and said 'Sophie, do you know what a male dog is called?'
I said 'B***ard' and they all laughed at me and called me stupid.

I ran home crying and to this day I've not told my family what happened.

Sophie
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My mother is from London and she always used to say 'maswell,' as in 'yeah, we maswell do that.' I never really thought about it until it came to my GCSE English Lit exam and I could not figure out how to spell it. She said it again a few days later and I questioned her over it. Turns out 'maswell' is actually her version of may as well. I have no idea why I didn't work it out earlier.

Lynda UK
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Until recently I thought that a minge was a weird sort of cake...
(I have no idea why)
My brother was helping me create an email address and I said go away and I'll do it myself, I thought of the perfect one, Eat My Minge, I thought it was brilliant and when I went to add my brother he ran into my room and asked if that was me, he looked angry and I just replied "No". He asked me who it was and I said it was a friend of mine. He asked me if I knew what it meant and I said I did but I wouldn't tell him. (I was so pannicked that it might be something really bad) I googled it and to my horror I found out it was slang for Vagina.

Vagina or Cake?
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When I was about 11, I heard or saw the phrase "jerk off" somewhere. I didn't know what it really meant, so I deducted that it meant to fool around or goof off. So my older cousin took me to the mall one day, and I at the time hated shopping, so I said to her, loudly, "Let's go jerk off in the arcade!!"
Yeah, it was pretty shortly that I learned what "jerk off" really meant. I cringe now thinking of how many times I said that without knowing that I was suggested that me and my friends go masturbate.

Kat
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I used to think our lawn mower was called a "lawn lower". This made sense because it made the grass lower. When I found out I was wrong I still thought my way made more sense because I didn't think "mower" was even a real word. By the time I was 8 I finally got it right.

Mr. E
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When I was 10, I thought that 'Lesbian' was a Lebanese woman. I had a feeling I wasn't right though, so I asked my equally naive friend. She told me it was two women who lived together.
Thanks to her, I used to go around saying my sister and I were lesbians.
Oh, the look on my mum's face when she heard me say that.

Fiona
score for this belief : 4.5vote this belief upvote this belief down

Well. There are a few words I come across I cannot pronounce properly the first time I read it. The one I remember most is the word "patio." I was reading from a novel, and I remember re-reading the section about the "patio" (which I was pronouncing "Pay-She-Oh, probably due to French lessons.) Anyways, I turned to my mom and was like "What is a Pay-She-Oh?" and she was like "What?!?!" (This is coming from a grammar/spelling nerd, and a kid who used to read dictionaries and encyclopedias for fun, so it was extremely embarrassing for me.) I turned around and said "Pay-She-Oh." again, thinking it was some strange word. I showed my mom and read: (This is basically what it said, as far as I remember.) "They were sitting around a table on the pay-she-oh, eating Sloppy Joes." she turned around and looked me in the eye, and said "Honey, that's Pat-Ee-Oh." I really, really felt embarrassed. I've always taken my spelling, grammar, and pronunciation very seriously, and needless to say, I was tormenting myself by studying more of the dictionary after this happened.

StrangerForYou
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When I was about 4 my neighbor would say "Peas" every time we said goodbye, I picked up on it and began saying "peas" to all my friends. My mother told me (after my neighbor moved away) that he was in fact saying "peace." D'oh

x-lax
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I would always get words mixed up, and two I still have problems with today are Mushroom and Marshmallow, and Sleeping Bag and Suitcase. I always need to think, Okay I need to pack my sleep...Suitcase.

ilia
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I had only heard the name of the combo Hall and Oates, so I thought their name was Haulin' Oats -- like what you do if you have to take your oats across town. It was associated in my mind with hauling ass, and it wasn't until college until I figured out my mistake when I said to a friend, "Hey, the show starts in ten minutes. We better haul oats."

Barbara
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I used to think that when you went to a baby shower, you actually had to buy the baby a shower and the ones the parents didn't want they'd throw it away. I was a strange kid.

Jeffree Deidara
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My spanish teacher used to think "strip malls" were places you find strippers. She was shocked when someone in our class told her she was working at the strip mall

Anon
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this is true... my friend maria thought that she was caucasian because she is a cocky asian. i told her what it really meant and she was sad.

cockyasian
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When my room was a mess I thought my mum was saying "it looks like a bombsit" which always confused me. I was about 16 when I realised she was actually saying "it looks like a bomb's hit it".

My sister also thought that balloon was actually said 'bloon' and that crayon was 'crown'.

Haylers
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i used to think that bounty hunters hunted bounty paper towels, so i always imagined some guy with a gun shooting big rolls of paper towels. i believed that tell was in 4th grade

Trout
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I believed that each person could only say a certain amount of words in their lifetime. Somehow I got that from what a person told me about having to use words wisely. Which was why I was worried that my talkative brother would soon use all of his up.

Megan Spilker
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top belief!

One day when I was about 7 or 8 my guy friend from across the street came over. He was always bragging about anything he could think of, so one day I told him I could speak Cherokee, he asked me to prove it and I just blurted out some random made up words. My dad had been BBQing just a few feet away and when I stopped "talking" he said "Pretty good Cherokee sweetie."
After that I had completely convinced my friend that I could speak Cherokee, and my dad had convinced me that I could too.

I was about 11 when I finally figured out that he was kidding.

Little Lies Alot
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