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Until very recently, I thought "archives" was pronounced like "are chives".
When I was a kid and was misbehaving at my grandparents' house, my grandfather, who was an Army veteran, told me if I didn't shape up he'd "put me on report". I then would turn around and tell my mom when my parents got back that he said he was going to "put me on the porch".
i used to swear down that the word huge was spelt and pronounced 'fuge' this resulted in a major fight with my friend at the age of 7, and because he was a boy and i was a girl he won. I believed for ages that if id won the fight then the word would have been 'fuge.'
I used to think that babies could communicate with eachother, just as adults communicate with eachother. I just assumed there was "baby's English" and then "adult English". I also theorized that if you were at JUST the right age, (for example: 3 year, 7 months and two days old) you would be able to speak both languages.
At the time, I had a cousin who was 3 years old and her brother was just a baby. Me and my cousins all believed in my theory. We sought to exploit my 3-year old cousin and create a "baby translation company". :)
My mom used to act out the one-person, "You must pay the rent!" scene for my sister and me. It's the one where a comb or similar object is used to signify when the person is playing either the landlord, woman, or hero. Well, it always ends with the landlord saying, "Curses! Foiled again!" For the longest time I believed the phrase was, "Purses, boiled again!!" This would always conjure images in my head of a bunch of purses sitting in a huge pot of boiling water. I wasn't sure why purses being boiled was a bad thing to have happen to you, but I had no reason to question it. Eventually I repeated the phrase in front of my mother one day and she had a pretty good laugh before correcting me.
When I was young, I went to go see the movie 'Titanic' with my mother. Good idea for a family movie, right? I specifically remember the scene when Jack is showing Rose his sketch book, and the drawings of the one-legged prostitute. I thought 'prostitute' was a fancy word for politician. I thought that she probably wasnít a very good one if she kept on being naked all the time. The sad thing is, I kept on thinking prostitute=politician until I was a teenager. Of course, now that I'm older I know itís the other way around.
I used to believe when someone said "...as far as the eye can see...", that they were speaking of the Ican Sea. I also believed that the Ican Sea was somewhere in Europe. So, it's pretty far away (at least from where I was).
I used to believe that the word 'circumstances' was pronounced 'circus dancers'.
I used to believe that British people were jealous of Americans because only Americans can pronounce the letter "r" correctly.
One day when I was about 7 or 8 my guy friend from across the street came over. He was always bragging about anything he could think of, so one day I told him I could speak Cherokee, he asked me to prove it and I just blurted out some random made up words. My dad had been BBQing just a few feet away and when I stopped "talking" he said "Pretty good Cherokee sweetie."
After that I had completely convinced my friend that I could speak Cherokee, and my dad had convinced me that I could too.
I was about 11 when I finally figured out that he was kidding.
I went to a day camp for two weeks when I was 7. It was run by school teachers and were called counselors, a word I didn't know. After several days of our classes being swapped around or not having certain ones, I was convinced the adults were "cancelers" because they were canceling the classes.
I used to believe GPS stood for Ginormous Processing System.
I used to believe that the word "artificial" was actually "art official," like artifical flavored candy was some sort of official art or something.
As a child, my twin sister and I used to pronounce `Spaghetti' as `Mastaghetti'. Sounds a bit rude, no?
I used to think that getting "knocked up" meant getting hurt. One day when I was about 5 years old I scraped my knee then told my mom i got "knocked up". You should have seen the look on her face.
I have a friend who, up until about 6 months ago, thought the color turquoise was actually "turk boys". He is 23 years old, by the way.
My mother's godson was unable to say pacifier when he was little. Instead, he would just scream, "Fire" when the pacifier fell out of the crib.
I read a lot of Calvin and Hobbes as a young child, so one day I found myself wondering, "Why don't speech bubbles come out of our mouths as we talk?" This puzzled me for at least a month afterward.
When I was young, my mother would always say things were "as slow as a wet week". I realise now that this is a figure of speech referring to the way that things can seem really slow or boring during rainy weather.
I used to believe that there were these soggy, spongy creatures called "wet weaks", and I figured they must slop around everywhere incredibly slowly.
I used to think that Italian was just English with O and A at the end!