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At Christmas when we heard the poem The Night Before Christmas, the one with the guy who got up and saw santa and all... well anyway there was a part where it was describing santa with his stomach that shook like jelly and all, and they said that he "turned with a jerk" and I thought that teh poem had a curseword in it, and that it said santa was a jerk.
I used to think making promises was wrong, because my dad said, "Don't swear."
In fourth grade my friend and I thought we were cool and swearing was the "cool" thing to do. So we would yell at her dog "Get off me you f*ck!" and use swears totally wrong everytime her mom would try and yell at us she would end up laughing.
Ok..well when I was little, my parents were watching tv, and I was in the room to..I had never heard of a basta*d...So I really dident know it was a cuss word I figured you said it when you were mad at someone. So, a day or so later I wanted to sound imporant and we were fishing and I was going to try and catch the minnow out of the bucket and it kept slipping out of my hand so i shouted///"You backstard!" and They got a good laugh at my misunerstanding and then explained I shouldent say that word...
I used to believe my middle name was a 'bad word' because my mom only used it when I was in trouble.
When I was in Kindergarten I had come home one day yelling,"mommy mommy Sapir(my friend) said the f word. My mom said,"what did she say" and I said,"Sapir said stupid".
When i was 9 i used to believe that shiites was prounounced @#&*ies. So when i asked my mom whats the difference between the @#&*ies and the sunnis was, she sent me to my room without dinner. The next day i asked my bestfriend what she thought i had done to upset my mother. She told me my mother was probably offended that i didn't know what the difference was(she believed thats how you pronounced it too). Until i was about 12 i believed i was either a @#&* or a sunni but i didnt want to offen my mom again by asking.
when i was little and learned how to "flick someone off", my dad found a way to stop my bad habit. he said, yes the middle finger is bad, but the pointer finger is worse, so i went around putting my pointer finger in peoples faces, and when they asked what it meant, i would say, "i dont know, but its something really bad"
Once, when I was about six, my aunt got dressed up to go out. She asked my opinion about how she looked. I thought she looked good, and so I told her, "You look like a slut." Apparently my family let me watch too much of the television show "Married with Children" where there are tons of pretty girls commonly referred to as sluts.
I used to think a bastard oughta be a kind of bird. Sort of like a buzzard.
My mom tried not to swear in front of me, but one day she accidentally broke something in the kitchen. She shook her fist and said said "Shit". She didn't see me, so she hoped I hadn't heard. (I think I was about 3 or 4.)
But I had. She caught me in front of the mirror later, shaking my little fist and yelling "Dit! Dit!" because I couldn't make the "s' sound yet.
To this day, Mom occasionally says "dit".
When I was little, a lot of my books were British, but some were American (and some were in French, but that's another story). So Mom had had to explain to me that there were some words in English that were different from words in American, like "boot" was a thing that went on your feet in America, but it was the space in the back of the car in England. (This after I asked where the boots for the car were.)
A little while later we went skiing, and I was put in ski kindergarten. Apparently the instructor swore in front of me. Dad came home soaking wet from a rainstorm one day, and I said "I wish this fucking rain would stop".
After a little investigation by my Mom, I revealed that I'd learned "that word" from Trevor, the ski instructor. Mom cleverly explained that since Trevor was Scottish, he used some different words, and if I used those words, nobody would understand me! So I forgot all about them. Good thing I didn't think I could speak Scottish!
A girl in our primary school class had been kept back a year because of learning difficulties, so - presumably to prevent her from feeling worse about it - the teacher forbid anyone from saying "stupid". Being one of the smarter ones, it was obvious to me that calling someone "stupid" wasn't very nice, but 2 years later when I told someone "I don't like football, it's stupid!" the whole playground fell out with me. In our small school words like "bum" and "poo" were okay, but "stupid" was just far too far. If someone said it you would run to the teacher and whisper "James said the "s" word!" in her ear.
They must have thought that we were terribly brought up.
Until the 12th grade, I used to think "fuck" was the ugliest word in the English language.
Then in English class, someone said "fuck". The teacher said "I heard the f-word". People said "what do you mean by f-word". And I said "the ugliest word in the English language".
And the teacher said "actually, it's NOT". I was surprised and asked what it was. She said "I'm not gonna say it, I'm not gonna define it, I'm just gonna spell it:
I had never heard it before. But you bet that when I got home, the first thing I did was look it up in the dictionary.
English was our second language, BTW.
when we were kids, my dad would always call me and my sister 'little buggers' when we were being bold. we didnt know that buggering meant anal sex, and he certainly didnt mean it in that way. so one day when on holiday and my sister had just turned 17 my dad let her have her first alcohol drink, some alco-pop which she got drunk on very quickly. we were telling jokes etc when my sister told a rude one and my dad colled her a little bugger. she stood up in the very busy bar and said for everyone to hear 'Ah stop buggering me! You're always buggering me! Go bugger someone else, you big bugger!' Needless to say she got in a lot of trouble and we prompty left the bar!
I used to think bitch was a type of lizard.
When I was a lil 'un, I used to think that if you cursed at someone, you actaully put a curse on them. I never learned the term swearing until I was about 10. So you can believe my suprise when I heard my older cousin getting in a fight with one of the other kids at our trailer park, and called him a mothaf*cka. I thought that the other kid [who always gave me sweets to make my cousin jeleaus], would die and I would have no more sweets! So the next day I went up to the other kids caravan and asked his mum "did robby's boils go away yet?"
In second grade I learned the f-word. It was somewhat sudden. We where talking about stuff, then a friend said "THE BATHROOM WALL HAS THE F WORD ON IT!!". Both me and the other guy was curious, so we asked what it was. "F*cking" he replied. When the other guy asked me what it ment (everyone went to me with questions, me being the class nerd.) so I said "I dunno, big jerk?"
so then he reacted like I called his mom a prostitute. "YOU SAID A BAAAAAD WORD" he explained it was bad because "Big" was in front of it. And then he suddenly thought "What's so bad about 'Fun King'" and said it over and over. Then I learned what it meant from my then best friend. He said it meant "Having sex" for so long I thought a nasty way to say "Having sex" was "Having F*ck"
When I was very little, I lived in an apartment complex next door to some VERY religous people. The children of said family beleived that stomach, butt, and belly were swear words.
When I was really little, I would remark on how fat people were because I didn't realize it was rude. My mother explained it to me, but rather than understanding, I figured that "fat" was a swear word. The next time someone overweight walked by, I declared, "Mommy, that lady is NOT THIN!"
She also told me I could never say the word "ain't" so I assumed it was a swear. I was very distressed, because I was afraid this meant I wasn't allowed to sing "The Old Gray Mare" anymore.