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When I was younger, (up to when I was about 7 years old), I believed that the salemen/women that come to your door were asking you to become an actor. I had no idea you had to audition or anything. I was always hoping for a spot on Barney or be a voice on Arthur, and I was mad at my mom for telling the people, "We're not interested."
Around the age of the 8 or 9 I noticed that Barbara Eden in the "I Dream of Jeannie" repeats was pretty darn sexy. I was convinced that a) this was just an accident of the production rather than intentional and b) I was the ONLY PERSON WHO NOTICED THIS. I believed that for 6 years.
I used to believe that actors would volunteer to die whenever I saw someone get shot in a scene. In fact I remember that it was a scene from TJ Hooker movie.
When I was little, there was a show that my father watched which seemed like all the time called "Dinosaurs" about a robot/costume -like dino family who led human lives in the Stone Ages. They kinda were like the Simpsons too. Anyways there was this one episode where Senclaire, (the father dinosaur) couldn't wait to get rid of his rude, pain-in-the-ass, aging mother-in-law. In the show, it was the custom to throw the elderly into a deep, deep hole just before death. They even demonstrated this in a little clip with a poor dino being thrown into the pit, screaming at the top of their aging lungs. After viewing the clip, Sencliare and his boss laughed. Senclaire's son asked him if his grandmother should find her way out of the pit, and an eager Senclaire scoffed "Once you're in, you're in." And this on account scared me to no end. (Im clausterphobic by the way.)
Well, needless to say, I was TERRIFIED of being thrown into a deep dark pit with already rotting bodies whom had met the same ordeal before me. And i believed humans in real life did this to their poor elderly. I remember crying for my grandpa, and ultimately dreading the day I would meet my fate.
I would tell everyone I never wanted to get old. No one does, but my real reason was so I could escape being chucked into this so-called pit. At one point my greatest mission in life was to find and cover up the pit.
I remember crying to my mother, asking would they force me to attend Grandpa's "pit" ceremony when his time came. Naturally, she was very confused.
It never really did occur to me that we actually "bury" our dead. And to this day, whenever we pass a cliff or a hole, my brothers oh-so graciously remind me.
When I was a kid, I used to think that the girl on "Adventures In Wonderland" really did go through a real mirror to get to Adverture Land.
When I was 5, I was terrified of pro wrestlers. After watching a wrestling show with my dad, I thought that as soon as I went to bed, a guy with a black and white painted face and oversized muscles was going to come in and hit me with a chair.
June 5/06: I hope this belief isn't regarded as tasteless, but the TV sitcom MARRIED... WITH CHILDREN premiered in 1987 when I was 8, and being a child I always confused Al Bundy, the fictional sitcom character, with real-life serial killer Ted Bundy!
At one point in my youth "That Girl" with Marlo Thomas was on TV right next to Batman. I was a huge Batman fan and for some reason thought Thomas' show was "Bat Girl." I watched that show for what felt like years, waiting for her to turn into Bat Girl.
There used to be a channel called TechTV. On it, they had a show called "The Screen Savers". I used to think that it was a show where they showed Screen Savers which are those little videos that play when you walk away from your computer. As soon as I watched it I realized it was a show about computers.
Way back in the 1950's there was a crime drama called "The Naked City". When my mother was a child, she heard about it when she was young and she thought it was about a city FULL of naked people. She got a big suprise when she first saw it.
I used to think that the TV show "Law & Order" was "Lawn Order" Until I was about 8, I never thought the TV show had anything to do with crime, but instead, i spent 8 years thinking it was about mowing lawns in a special order.
I used to believe that after my bed time there was no more tv shows left so if you got up in the middle of the night and turned the tv on, it'd just be blank because they ran out of shows at that time of night.
I used to think that the begining theme song on shows was done live every time. And I always thought that the people probubly got really sick of doing the same thing EVERY day.
When I was little, there was a children's series called 'The Demon Headmaster', that was about a teacher that hypnotised the children with his eyes. When he took of his glasses, you could see his eyes going all green and swirly. I was terrified of getting hypnotised myself, through the TV screen, so I'd hide behind a cushion to protect myself from his mind controlling rays.
Everytime I saw Oscar the Grouch pull something out of his trashcan, I wanted to get inside of it. I knew it had to be huge, a trash can mansion, and I wanted to see what else he had.
My parents used to watch Dance Fever (70s show where couples would disco in fancy costumes and compete). I always wondered how the couples knew what moves to make. I thought they made it up as they go along. And if the lady jumped and the guy caught her, well he just happened to look at the right moment and catch her on time.
When I was little, I thought that "Beverly Hills 90210" and "Beverly Hill Billies" were the same show. In fact, I think I used to call them "Beverly Hill Billies 90210."
When I was young I never used to understand why the couple in Blind Date would go off and come back five minutes later having been on holiday looking completely different- sometimes with different hair colour or skin colour... (for those who don't watch the show of course it turned out they'd disappear behind the doors and the couple who were sent off the week before would come back and tell everyone how they got on!!!)
My parents never had a television, but occasionally I would go to my Grandparent's house and watch it there.
My Grandmother's favourite show was M*A*S*H, so that was the only thing we watched.
Until I was 8, I though the only thing on telly was Hawkeye, Radar and Hoolahan...
I used to watch I Dream of Jeanie and wonder how they got her hair to do that! I thought she must have tons of hair to do a ponytail with a braid wrapped around it!
I don't know why the concept of wigs and hair pieces was so difficult for me.