I used to believe that Bo and Luke Duke(Dukes of Hazzard TV show) could see me through the TV. I had a huge crush on Bo and would fluff my hair, put on my best nighty, and smile into TV during the whole program. I was a bit precocious.
My mom was sick a lot and had to stay in the hospital. I beleived that Ohura from Star Trek would visit us and have pity on us and decide to move in and be our mom...
I used to watch Alf and he'd always mention lesbians so one day I asked my father what a lesbian was. He told me that people from Lebanon were lesbians and I believed him for a very long time after that.
I used to believe that the Oscars were a pagan ritual aired on TV to try and get new members. Therefore, I was always afraid of the actors I saw recieving awards, because I thought they had become one of them and were now trying to get me to become a pagan as well by using subliminal messages whenever I watched a movie with them in it.
I used to believe - due to my dad and sisters that "Lassie" - the dog on the TV series was in fact a boy in a dog costume. Hmmm
When I was little I was in love with Alvin, from The Chipmunks cartoon. I wanted to marry him, and I spent many hours figuring out the best way to tell my parents I was in love with a cartoon.
Note: This is borderline "Misheard Lyrics." I've been a Trekkie ("Star Trek" fan, for the 2 or 3 out there who don't know) since I was born. Once when I was about three, I asked Mom & Dad when Kirk & the crew of the "Enterprise" were going to see the Snowman. "... to boldly go where Snowman has gone before." Nowadays, I'm an illustrator; and whenever I paint a nighttime or outer space scene, I always include a close-knit binary pair of stars that resembles a snowman.
When I was four I wanted to watch some Saturday morning cartoon but basketball was on instead. I was so mad that I sent a letter to the TV station to complain. To make it sound more official, I signed the letter,
"Love, The King"
Before I learned about the existence of stuntmen, I used to believe that suicidal actors were used.
As small children our grandfather would force all of us (his grandchildren) to watch The Incredible Hulk on tv (with Lou Ferrengo). This never really did it for me, but my cousin would repeatedly say "the hulk's nice, isn't he," whenever the hulk appeared. As a birthday treat, his father decorated his room with Hulk wallpaper, as he always talked about the Hulk. That night, my cousin lay in bed, unable to sleep as he was actually frightened to death of the hulk. It seemed that he was actually extremely scared, but believed that by repeatedly saying nice things about him, he would become his friend and would therefore be safe. My uncle was not pleased at having to strip all the wall paper down the next day.
Probably because it was on so late at night, and because it showed people in their underwear, I thought Benny Hill was the most hardcore pornography in existence.
Ahhh, The Incredible Hulk. I wanted to be just like him. I also happened to be a picky eater. Imagine my parents' glee when I believed the source of Hulk's strength was split-pea soup, and if I just ate enough of it myself, I could aquire his powers, too.
I used to think that everyone understood what trolley from Mr. Roger's Neighborhood was saying (dinging). I would get very upset and frustrated thinking I was the only one who did not understand. I would yell at the TV saying "What are you saying?"
I used to think that 'bonus' was some horrible skull creature made of bones. Whenever someone got a bonus on a game show I'd be scared for them, and I thought it was horrible someone would make them face the 'bonus'.
The opening sequence of Sesame street used to show all these kids running from different places to get to Sesame street. Obviously this meant that I too could join in the fun of Sesame street! I naturally assumed that, by simply running in any random direction for long enough I would just wind up on Sesame street. I was eventually found a mile and a half away form my house under a bridge, wondering where the hell Oscar the Grouch was hiding.
I used to think that the TV show "Law & Order" was "Lawn Order" Until I was about 8, I never thought the TV show had anything to do with crime, but instead, i spent 8 years thinking it was about mowing lawns in a special order.
When I was about 6 and my little brother was 4 we liked to play make-believe. On of our favorite things to play was Batman and Robin. We didn't know much background behind Batman and Robin because our mom thought it was too violent of a show for us to watch. Our favorite thing to act out was a wedding ceremony in which Batman and Robin would wed. We didn't realize that Robin was a boy...
My husband believed as a child that there was a television series called "To Be Announced" and that it was just a random sort of a show, different actors, different subjects, different times.
When I was little I thought that the audience in sitcoms was really the cast itself watching playbacks of their show and laughing...
I used to believe that Worzel Gummidge really did remove his head, and that he was some kind of undead monster. It really used to scare me.