I Used To Believe newsletter: April 2009
Hi,
This month there's more to family pets than meets the eye - they're either mineral based, contain internal combustion engines or have been into space.
For more great beliefs visit www.iusedtobelieve.com or get the book of the site, Butter Comes From Butterflies, available from Amazon and all good booksellers!
Have fun,
Mat.
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I used to believe that you heard the sea through the large sea shells I collected as a child. One night I was convinced I heard the clanking sounds of an anchor being dropped and told my whole class the next day. I was glad my teacher did not spoil this conviction for me...
Rina
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When I was in kindergarten and my sister was in second grade, we found a worm in the yard and put it in a cup of dirt to look at it. She claimed she could communicate with the worm through an elaborate series of head movements. She promised me that I too would be taught this language in second grade. Second grade came. Every day I waited for my teacher to get in front of the class and say "Attention everyone! We're not having math today, kids, because we'll be learning worm language." Every day I thought, "This has to be the worm language day." The day never came. I'm still bitter.
Tom
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That blue cheese was made by scraping mould off bathroom walls. My mother actually told me that.
sandee
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When I was a kid I thought that communism was some kind of strawberry ice cream. I came to that conclusion because I overheard adults talking about the Reds and the cold war and the only thing I knew that was red and cold was strawberry ice cream. I couldn't understand why people were afraid of it or against it.
Anon
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I used to believe that birds perched on telephone wires to keep their feet warm.
Anon
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When I was 5 or 6, the family cat started acting very strange. I asked my mother what was wrong with her, and my mother told me that "The cat is in heat." I didn't know what that meant, so I thought it was the same as when the car "overheated". I told my friends to be careful because "The cat is overheated".
Anon
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Sadly, I didn't realise I could think inside my head until I was about 6. My parents always used to wonder why I would talk to myself.
Lunchable
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A young lady called Sue once told me that when she was a little girl, she believed that grown-ups couldn't run - for the obvious reason that she had never seen any of them running. One day, she gave cheek to her father, then ran away, supremely confident that he would never be able to run after her. That was the day she was disabused of that delusion.
Malcolm
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Growing up, we didn't have much money so my mother was always telling us different reasons why we couldn't go to various places. When a 7-11 convenience store opened near us, we wanted to go, but she told us you could only go if you were 7 or 11. I believed this until I was 10 years old, when my aunt stopped there for gas and started to take me inside with her. When I explained why we couldn't go inside, she explained my mother's reason for the lie.
Misty
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When I was about five, my best friend told me that a vampire lived in the end cubicle of the girls' toilets at school. The other cubicles had a ghost and a goblin that were decidedly scarier. She said the vampire would eat us if we went in wearing a watch, so every time one of us needed to go in there, we gave our watch to the other girl. One time when she was not in class I really had to go, so I ran as fast as I could, skidded on the mopped floor and knocked myself out on the wall next to the cubicle.
Eleanor
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When my sis was two years old, she used to believe that the hair strands that was on the house floor were hers. She would carefully pick them up and put them on her head so that she wouldn't go bald. :)
Faith Teo
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When I was about 6 the Apollo landed on the moon, this was on the evening news every night. At the same time our neighbours had a large Alsatian dog named Pollo. Night after night I fantasized about how Pollo survived in his small cubicle and how he landed on the moon...
Rina
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I used to think a con artist was someone who painted pictures in prison.
Brandon Campbell
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When I was in elementary school, all the buses had a sign posted that said "Bring or use drugs - face expulsion." I thought this sign said "Bring or use drugs - face explosion," I guess because I didn't understand about being kicked out of school. So I thought, probably until I was about 12 and re-read the sign, that if you used drugs, your face would explode.
Ka-boom!
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When I was 6 years old I had a dog named Sandy. And I thought she was made of Sand.
Billy Bob Joe
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I believed Dr. Pepper was pepper-flavored medicine and was afraid to drink it.
Anon
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I used to believe that while I slept, rats and mice would creep out of the walls, cut me in half, slide like a disc in, and magically stitch it all together... I figured if I couldn't see myself getting taller, that's how it must've happened. I'm still amazed I didn't end up in an asylum.
Anon
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When I was younger I was absolutely convinced that there was a real value for "x" and that everyone was hiding it from me. I got a scholarship to highschool.
Mike
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I used to believe that a salad bar was just like a three musketeers bar but green, and when you bit into it, it would have carrots and lettuce and veggies in it. I believed this till I was like 10 and I'm now 14.
Lysette
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I used to believe that a minute was a really long time. I had really long hair and so if nits were going around school I would always get them. Mum would put the nit shampoo in my hair and I would ask her when I could rinse it out and she would always say "in a minute," then leave me in the bath for an hour.
sandee
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