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I Used To Believe newsletter: February 2008

Hi,

It can be a jungle in your kitchen, with elephants stamping around in the heater, giraffes sneaking under the door and monkeys hatching in the fruit bowl.

For more great beliefs visit www.iusedtobelieve.com or get the book of the site, Butter Comes From Butterflies, available from Amazon and all good booksellers!

Have fun,

Mat.

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When I was really young, I thought saying 'good riddance' to people was a posh, grown-up way of saying goodbye. I never quite understood why everyone would tell me off for being rude when I said it.
Not Important

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When I was little (before school) I would insist that my birthday was Remember 2nd because I knew that was a word and I thought November was a word my family made up to trick me, since they would laugh every time they asked and corrected me.
Sara

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I used to think you couldn't die if you didn't have shoes on. Coincidentally, so did one of my friends.
Casey

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I believed that ham was mouse meat, because it was pink and my dad told me so.
Zo

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When I was little, my great-grandma told me that she had an invisible thinking-cap that only worked when she tugged on her ear, pressed her nose and made a weird noise. I asked her why I didn't have one, and she told me that mine was still growing on the back of my head. So for ages, every time I saw her, I'd ask her to check and see if my thinking-cap had gotten any bigger.
Onatel

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When I was little I had a fluorescent bulb in my bedroom. It would often take 1-2 seconds to fully turn on. This was grand because I thought that when people referred to the speed of light, they meant how long it took a light bulb to turn on starting when the switch was flipped. This made me very happy, because I could run to the center of my room before the light came on, and was therefore faster than the speed of light!
Joseph

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I have second degree burn scars on my arm from pulling a hot cup of tea down on myself when I was a toddler. I don't remember actually doing this and somehow I got it into my head that I was burned by lava. I had a whole scenario worked out in my head about my family and me jumping from island to island in a river of lava when some of it splashed up and burned me.
Sarah

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When I was around 7 yrs old, my father was vacuuming and found a straw sticking out of an electric outlet. He told us that whoever did it (me or my 2 younger sisters) must tell him immediately so he could rush them to the hospital before their hair fell out. I started crying profusely and my father assumed I had stuck the straw in the outlet. As he dragged me to my room, I yelled "I didn't do it" and he asked "then why are you crying?" I screamed at the top of my lungs "I DON'T WANT A BALD SISTER!!!!"
frank

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When I was at that short age of about 4 or 5 where you're always playing on the floor, I used to play near a step that had a gap under the door. My dad warned me one day to be careful because "drafts" came out from underneath. Only I heard it as "giraffes". I spent so many days after that watching for tiny giraffes to come out from under the door, but they never did...
Holly

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I used to believe that nose hairs were the other end of hairs on top of your head.
Walker

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When I was a kid, my father told me that his thinning hairline was caused by flying fish that used to leap out of the ocean and bite out a few strands as he caught the ferry to work every day. I was 23 when I realised that this couldn't possibly be true!
Simon

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I'm the only child in my family and I really wanted to have an elder brother to take care of me. So when I was very small, I asked my mum to give me an elder brother. She said, honey, you can't have an elder brother because you are our first child and if I have another baby it will be younger than you! After thinking deeply, I told my mum that she could eat me, have another baby then give birth to me again so I could be the younger one :P
Daisy

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When I went to Spain at the age of 7, I thought their currency was potatoes. It was pesetas.
Helen W

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I have a mole on my stomach and it wasn't until a few years ago that I realized it really wasn't the result of a cockroach bite from my baby years. I'm 17 years old.
Charita

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I believed my Daddy when he told me if I sat on a coconut long enough, it would hatch a baby monkey! I tried for months but with no success.
Kym

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My best friend was so pale I thought she could glow in the dark.
tattiebird

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I used to believe that when the school nurse checked us all for head lice, they were looking for "head-lights". I really wanted to stick around and see if they found the freak kid with a couple of built-in fog lamps stowed away.
Shane

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When I was around six I was told the joke: Where do hamsters go when they die? To Hamsterdam. I took this literally and thought that this was Heaven and everyone went there when they died. At my grandfather's funeral I told my grandma "Don't worry, Grandad is in Holland now."
Janine

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For some reason, I used to think that porcelain and teeth were the same material. I wondered how they ever got enough teeth together to make a toilet.
Anon

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When I was a kid, I asked my grandfather how the heat in our house worked. He showed me the heater in the kitchen and said something that I heard as "the heating elephants inside". Eventually I found out he was saying "elements" but for a long time I imagined little tiny elephants walking around inside the heater to make it warm. I spent about an hour that day sitting next to the heater trying to see the elephants.
Anon

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