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I Used To Believe newsletter: November 2008

Hi,

You have to keep your wits about in the bathroom, if this month's beliefs are anything to go by. Luckily we've also got a technique involving crackers which means you might never need to go!

For more great beliefs visit www.iusedtobelieve.com or get the book of the site, Butter Comes From Butterflies, available from Amazon and all good booksellers!

Have fun,

Mat.

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I used to believe that everybody had different colored pee. Mine was yellow. My brother told me his pee was green. And when I went over to my grandmother's house, her toilet water was blue, so I thought that was her pee. Why'd I get stuck with yellow pee?! I wished I had black pee. That would have been so cool!
Kino Lee

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Until I was about 18 I thought the drink "rum and coke" was a "Roman coke" and I always used to wonder what made it so Roman....
Brad

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Reading someone's Roman Coke story, it reminded me of this... You know when you order something at a restaurant and the waitress/waiter asks you if you'd like a soup or salad? Up until I was about 8 or 9 I always thought (s)he was offering a "super salad". I figured it out the day I was asked if I'd like a soup or salad and I simply said, "yes, please".
Rachel

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I used to think that when people were talking about the World Wars, they were saying War War I and War War II. I thought the wars were so bad you had to say it twice.
Anon

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I've no idea where this believe came from but as long as I can remember I was convinced that baboons ate through their bottoms! I'm 20 now and only realised this wasn't true a few months ago when I said in a (rather random) conversation about baboons in front of my entire family "I think it's weird how they feed through their bums" and they couldn't stop laughing.
emma

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When I was about 4 we had a bathtub with feet. I would never ever go into that bathroom because I didn't want the tub to have any opportunity to chase me around.
Stormy

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I thought raisins were made out of jelly in a factory like gummy bears until I was 16!
jen

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I used to believe airplanes were powered by magic carpets.
Anonymous

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When I was young I used to believe that when your bladder was full you could eat dry foods (like crackers, chips, or bread) and it would absorb all of your pee so you wouldn't have to use the bathroom any more.
Anon

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I used to believe that the road signs that pointed up to indicate forward moving traffic were signs intended for airplanes. Naturally, since the sign pointed up, it meant for airplanes to fly up.
Anon

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A physician I worked with once told me that when he was a little boy, he believed when a store was "closed for inventory" it meant that they were closed so they could "invent" new things. He couldn't wait for them to reopen, so he could see all the new things they invented.
Sandy

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I used to believe that my sister unscrewed her head to get her necklace off!
Nancy

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When I was younger, I would sit at the top of the stairs in the middle of the night, listening to my dad snore. I always thought he had a miniature lawnmower in his throat that would turn on when he was asleep and shave his face.
Myou

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When I was little, I thought "navy" meant dark, because "navy blue" was a dark shade of blue. I didn't know what the navy was. One time when trying to describe a sort of forest green color, I called it "navy green". When my uncle corrected me, I tried to cover up by saying "I knew that, but navy *also* means dark, like Navy Blue." I thought he wouldn't know any better :P
Anon

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I used to believe I was the only one who could see the moon during the day because no one else ever talked about it.
Sharon

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When I was around 4 or 5, my parents got a plastic cover for the shower head in the shape of a clown's face. He was smiling widely, and the water came through his open mouth. It terrified me. I was convinced that it was alive and if I took my eyes off of it for one second, it would seize the opportunity to attack. I remember groping blindly for shampoo and soap because I knew I could not look away if I wanted to escape the shower.
Kim

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I used to accompany my dad when we dropped my mom off at the subway stop to go to work. I thought that's where my mom worked: at the subway stop.
Rachel

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From the age of 2 or 3 I was afraid of fuzz. Lint on a sweater was horrifying - you can only imagine. I was pretty sure fuzz balls were actually spiders sleeping in little balls of web, and if you touched it, the spider would come out... and it wouldn't be happy. This resulted in me running screaming, "Piece of Fuzzzzz!!!! Ahhhhhhh!!!", on a regular basis until the neighbors asked if I had special needs.
Mrs. Fuzz to you

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I used to believe that the yellow light in traffic-lights meant Go Faster!
M. L. E.

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If you have freckles it is because you didn't wash your face well enough.
Anon

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