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I Used To Believe newsletter: October 2006

Hi,

This month people are dying from having cereal thrown at them, then coming back to life as flowers, helped by their horses. And if you're pouring beer on the road for good luck, watch out for the face-blurring disease!

Have fun,

Mat.

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When I was little I thought that reincarnation meant that you turned into a walking, talking carnation if you weren't successful in life.
Rachel D.

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When I was younger, and after watching a lot of western movies, I believed that horses had the power to bring cowboys back to life by licking their faces. This seemed to happen a lot when a cowboy had been shot or knocked out.
John

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I used to believe that everyone wanted to be an astronaut when they grew up. I guess I thought most adults had tried and failed, and had settled for an inferior option.
Andres Cabezas

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I used to believe that all garbage bags on the side of the road were filled with kittens that people had thrown away. I think it originated from a Tom & Jerry cartoon. I would cry and beg my mom to stop and pick up the bags but I wouldn't tell her why. I thought she would refuse because we already had 2 cats. It was torture on road trips but mom just thought I was environmentally conscious.
erin

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I used to hear a lot about serial killers when I was little so I asked my dad what it meant. He told me that "it was someone who killed people the same way". I took this to mean that serial killers would throw the same type of cereal at their victims to kill them.


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I used to believe that if you got drunk, your face disappeared. I used to watch Cops a lot, and when they blurred out the faces, they were usually of people who were wasted.
Courtney

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My uncle used to tell me that duck sauce was made from duck lips. When I protested that ducks didn't have lips, he told me it was because they were all cut off to make the sauce.
Meg

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One evening I was mentioning to my wife that my boss was going to have laser eye surgery. My six year old son overheard and interrupted with, "Cool! Is your boss gonna blast bad guys with his laser eyes?"
Anon

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I used to believe that when someone gave something up "cold turkey" it literally meant that they no longer ate cold turkey. I had no idea how that would affect smoking. I did understand vaguely how that would affect weight loss.
SM

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I used to think that when doctors didn't want to prescribe you medicine, they'd give you a gazebo.
JD

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I used to believe that the 'Emergency Stopping Lane' was in fact, the Emergency Shopping Lane, and used to desperately look for any sign of the shops!
Jacinta

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When I was little, if we drove past a carnival I would always beg to go on the rides. My parents told me that it wasn't open, that they were just testing the lights :(
Nancy F.

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I used to believe that when they said that you lost your luggage, that it actually fell out of the plane and landed in someone's back yard. So I was always amazed when they found it.
Michal

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When I was a child, I had a fear of bagels. I thought they were stale doughnuts.
Anon

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I used to believe that motorway pile-ups meant cars literally stacked one on top of the other. When I read about a "3 car pile-up" it amazed me that cars could crash in such a way that they'd be sitting on top of each other.
Fiona

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I used to think that the UK was short for Ukraine.
Mia

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I used to think that if someone had the last name which was also a color (White, Black, Brown, etc.), that'd also be their hair color. One day I was watching "Super Password" and some brown-haired guy with the last name of Green was a contestant, and I was very confused. Mom had to explain it quite carefully to me.
Josh

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I was shocked when I found out that dogs in foreign countries didn't know English commands.
Anon

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When I was little I didn't understand the phrase 'one for the road'. I thought it was some good luck ritual to pour a drink on the road before you drove.
one for the road

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I used to believe the Elgin marbles were actual huge round marbles... as opposed to carvings from antiquity. This was until fairly recently.
Kathryn

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