people

I used to believe…

When I was little my grandfather was telling me one of those naughty nursery rhymes. "Mary had a little lamb...she tied him to the heater..and every time he turned around he burned his little..." Then my grandmother said, "Kenny, you can't tell that child that." So my grandfather said "eyeball". They all laughed. I laughed too. I actually told this joke to people all the way past highschool until one day it just dawned on me that it wasn't "eyeball" it was "peter". I remember a feeling eureka when I realized why people never laughed like my family did when they heard the rhyme.

I used to believe…

when i was a little girl, i noticed that my mother had a tattoo. when i asked her how she got it, she told me that it appeared on her ankle (thats where the tattoo is) after she had eaten several breath mints. (you know the ones with the little red and white swirls) so obviously, i thought that this was true so i persuaded her to buy me an entire bag of them. i finished that bag 45 minutes later. imagine my disappointment when my tattoo didn't appear! i cried for about 3 days. ;) but lucky me, i got the press on tattoos. (the ones that rub off with soap and water) hehehehehe ^_^

I believed my Daddy when he told me if I sat on a coconut long enough, it would hatch a baby monkey! I tried for months but obviously no success...lol. Almost forty years later and I still think of baby monkeys whenever I see a coconut. :)

I used to think that my sign (cancer) was named after the disease. One day when I was probably in 5th grade my friend and her Mom were talking about their signs and they asked what mine was. I said Cancer...I don't like mine because it's the only bad one, why is mine a disease and yours is a scorpion?

I used to believe…

When I was little (before school) I would insist that my birthday was Remember 2nd because I knew that was a word and I thought November was a word my family made up to trick me, since they would laugh every time they asked and corrected me.

I used to believe…

That kids weren't allowed in Hawaii - my dad told me this when I was younger and wanted to go

I used to believe…

When I was little my mom told me the reason the dentist gloves tasted bad was because I wouldn't quit moving and whenever they got my mouth open I wuold try to close it again.

I used to think that your name was your destiny, so whatever your name meant, you had to become/witness. Once I knew a kid named Cayden, which means round or lumpy, and I told him that some day he would turn into a potato... I got in trouble for that!

i used to think anon was a person lol

I used to believe…

when I was a little girl I was convinced that "anonymous" was someones name, and that he sat all day in my attic writing books of all sorts. when he was done he would sign his name and send the finished book through some secret tube where my mom would pick it up and deliver it to my room. I always felt so bad for anonymous because he was forced to write so many books and poems, and also because what kind of nutjob names their kid Anonymous? His parents must have been monsters for forcing this weird identity upon him and locking him up in my attic as a slave.

i was born in south africa but my mum and dad are english but my cousins were born also in south africa but there dad is south african and theyve got a weird last name its "grobler" anyway we live in england now and when my cousin was about 8 she got mixed up with her d and b's so she was spelling her last name and she wrote grodler so 4 about a year i was thinking that u spell her last like grodler and that year on xmas my mum was writing a christmas card to her and her mum dad and bro and my mum wrote n the front "THE grobler family" and i sed to her she spellt their last name wrong

I used to believe…

My family all got together to watch Finding Nemo on dvd one night. My uncle and dad were talking about the voice of Dori being Ellen DeGeneris. They were talking about how she came out of the closet. But my little sister thought that Ellen lived in a closet. My uncle didn't help matter by telling her that yes Ellen lived in a closet and used a coffee can as a bathroom. SHe relayed all of her new found information to me and I set her staight on what coming out of the closet means. But everyn night I would go into her room to tell her goodnight. I would say " Goodnight Kerry" then open the closet door and say " Goodnight Ellen"

I used to believe…

When I was a freshman in high school my friends knew that I had Amish friends. One day I was telling this girl named Megan all about Amish living. For some reason I made up a story on the spot about how young Amish boys use the afterbirth of a cow as hair gel. I tolg her after the cow gives birth, the Amish wait until the afterbirth comes out and the scoop it into a jar. Then they seal it with wax and put it in the icebox until it thickens. The they just crack the wax and dip their comb in the jar and swipe some on thier heads like Dapper Dan.
On our senior trip she was talking about this story to me. I finally told her after four years that I made it up.

I used to believe…

When I was just past being Little I used to believe That other people could hear your thoughts if they were listening when you were thinking nasty thoughts about them..I had major paranoid guilt issues all through my adolescence because of that

I used to believe…

My middle name is Viola, but for the longest time, I thought it was Vagina. I was sure all little girls had the middle name Vagina, so that doctors would be sure we were girls.

It confused me, however, that my brother's middle name was Joseph and not Penis.

I used to believe…

When I was about 5 my Mom told me that that when children did something naughty it was written on their forehead and only mothers could see it. So when I got in trouble I would place my hand over my forehead and say "It wasn't me!"