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My niece publicly chastised her mother church one day for introducing her to someone named Dick, much to the embarrassment of her mother and the gentleman. My niece thought her mother was referring to the man by the slang term for male genitalia, not realizing that it is an actual name.
My name is Aline and when I was younger my brother had a poster of an Alien on the wall and under it it had the word Alien written on it. I thought that was my name and for quite awhile and I was secretly an Alien spy on a mission to take over the world. I remember I used to try to contact my planet by running around outside with a paper sign I made. They never did come back for me......:(
My Friend learned when she was little that Gym was short for gymnasium. For the longest time she thought her dad's name was Gymnasium because his name was Jim. He even told her his name was James but she still wouln't believe him and called him Gymnasium.
When I was little, I believed that every person with the same name had to look exactly alike. Example: Every Michael looked alike, every Jane looked alike.. you get the idea. Kind of like how all the different kinds of Barbies, Kens, etc. all look alike. I met another Samantha and she didn't look anything like me. I made her cry because I told her she was a "Samantha Imposter" and that there was no way that could possibly be her real name. Whoops.
my father's name is mike. as it happens, two of my uncles and my cousin are also called mike. when i was really little i asssumed that 'mike' meant 'man' and would call surprised shop-keepers and random strangers 'mike'
I thought it was illegal to call your parents by their real name. One day I even tested it out to see if I'd get arrested, "KELLY!" I shouted for my mom and then ran to my room crying.
My mom's last name starts with an N, but because of her Southern drawl, folks hearing her spell it out sometimes think that N is an M. So to clear up confusion, my mom always started spelling her name by saying "N as in Nancy..." Only, I was confused, and decided that my mom's middle name was really Enasinantsy. I named my teddy bear Enasinantsy after my mom, too.
My Friend told me once that he was in a minor car accident with his 7 year old son in the passenger seat. My friend got out the car to swap, name, insurance details, etc and then got back in the car and drove off. His son later asked what he was talking to that man about in the other car and my friend replied, 'we just swapped names and things'. his son then went all quiet and then asked..... 'so what are you called now then dad?'
When I was young I believed I was some legendary superhero called "The Great Back", - along the lines of The Incredible Hulk etc. Imagine my disappointment when some years later, I discovered I was indeed "The Great Back" but only in the sense that my Mam used to say; "Get washed son, you're as black as the grate back"
I used to believe that, since my last name was law, terms such as "mother-in-law" only applied to my family. So for instace if someone's last name was smith I thought it would be "father-in-smith" or "sister-in-smith".
I used to think that if someone had the last name which was also a color (White, Black, Brown, etc.), that'd also be their hair color. One day I was watching "Super Password" and some brown-haired guy with the last name of Green was a contestant, and I was very confused. Mom had to explain it quite carefully to me.
When announcers were advertising an upcoming star-studded event on television, they always would name several famous people, and then say, "....and many more!" Well, I always thought that this "Minnie Moore" was another star, maybe the sister of Mary Tyler. For a long time I wondered why I'd never seen her act in anything.
I remember when I was a kid Princess Diana died and I remember her being called "the princess of whales." So I thought that when you became a princess you got to choose an animal.I always wondered why she had picked whales..
I used to think the name Bob was just a name by itself, since I couldn't ever think of a name it could possibly be short for. It always confused me how any loving parent could name a child Bob.
So I came up with the brilliant idea that since the name Rob was short for Robert, that Bob would be short for...yes, Bobert. I held this belief seriously for a solid five years.
When i was little and i said 'Thank you' to people naturally they said 'Your welcome' i would scream at them 'No, im not! Im Megan!'
Still Getting Teased By My Brother...
My middle name is Viola, but for the longest time, I thought it was Vagina. I was sure all little girls had the middle name Vagina, so that doctors would be sure we were girls.
It confused me, however, that my brother's middle name was Joseph and not Penis.
I thought that Penelope was pronounced Pen-el-ope. I also thought Bob was short for Bobert. (Because Rob was short for Robert! Very logical, huh?)
When my cousin was younger his name was Alexander and he thought his middle name was "ander"
I used to believe my middle name was and. At age 12, I discovered that it was actually "ann".
When I first heard the term al fresco I thought it was someone's name. I think the first place I heard it was "an al fresco buffet" and thought "this guy Al Fresco must be a really good cook if they mention him by name!"