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Back in the day when I was a little kid I used to believe that Satan was under the ground we all walked on. So, I figured since he's doing evil things to people, might as well give some pay back by just stomping on the ground.
I used to believe that the soul was a "green, lima-bean shaped organ located somewhere near the gall bladder." This is the description of the soul I would have in my head whenever I thought about it. My grandma also had a little purple man as decoration in her kitchen who peeked over the cupboard with his nose hanging over -- somehow I then conceived that God was a purple man in a brown fedora and a big, green nose, who sat in the clouds and peeked over them when necessary to throw down lightning bolts.
I used to believe that God looked like Mr. Rogers
I used to belive that when it rained, God was taking a bath and water was falling out the side!
The actuall explanation is way less fun....
When i was little
i used to think
the monopoly man
was what god looked like.
so i would imagine
little monopoly angels
and the huge monopoly man
god watching over me.
I was afraid to take a shower because my sister told me that when the drain was opened, the devil could crawl up and get me. I was safe taking a bath, since the drain was closed.
When I was 6 I used to believe that the devil lived under my bed, and if I misbehaved he would scratch my feet when I am asleep at night. So now that I am 26 I am still afraid that he might scratch my feet when I am asleep, even though he hasen't.
When I was little, I thought that every person had a "recipe" and that God spent his mixing up people recipes in a big bowl and sending them down to Earth. And example would be that someone might have 3/4 cup of smartness mixed with a teaspoon of meanness and 3 tablespoons of art talent...etc. in their recipe. I was worried that my recipe wasnt very good and asked my mum if I could have a new one.
When I was little I thought the holy spirit was a bird. I don't know why, but that was the image I had in my head.
I used to believe God would sit in a room with all these TV monitors, how else could he know everything that was going on in the world!
That when it rained and the sun was out the devil was beating his wife. I used to believe that when it thundered God was bowling, and lightning struck then it was a strike.
I used to believe (when I was young) that a "sun worshipper" was a kind of religion, like what the Aztecs believed. Then I learned it refers to someone who lies out in the sun to get tan.
I used to believe both literal creationism and evolution, at the same time. I believed God made the world in 7 days and created Adam and Eve in the Garden of Even and all that, but I also believed humans evolved from apes through natural selection over millions of years. It wasn't like I had worked out a way to reconcile the two viewpoints, I just accepted both of them as literal truth without them ever being associated together in my mind - one was religion, one was science, so they didn't seem at all connected to me. It wasn't until I was 11 or so I realized they contradicted each other.
I thought that garden where Jesus went to pray before the Romans came and got him to be crucified was called the Garden of Yosemite. I was surprised that Jesus could transport himself to North America just to pray. Then I found out it was the Garden of Gethsemane. Good thing I never brought the subject up out loud!
I used to believe that if Jesus lived in my heart then the devil must live in my rear end because thats where all the nasty stuff in my body was.
We used to sing a song "He's got the whole World in his hands" and I figured that when God closed his hands it was night
I used to believe (and still kinda do) that I was in direct contact with God. Nowadays I occasionally ask favours of God, but when I was smaller it was so much weirder. I used to wage 'bets' against God, and they weren't little bets either. Here's an example:
Me: *To God* If my sister doesn't pass me the milk carton I'll die.
I would then implore my sister to give me the carton, but I didn't tell her why because I knew it seemed stupid.
As well as 'betting' I used to 'bargain'. For example, I would ask God to make me into a kind of alien I'd read about in a book (Animorphs series) in exchange for say, several years of my lifespan. After weeks of patience and no transformation, despite convincing myself it was happening for the first few days, I gave up on asking God to change my physical form and moved onto bartering for an increased lifespan for my family. I was a thoughtful kid if nothing else.
When i was about 6or7 I thought at noon when the sunset was out, the clouds would turn a red or pinkish colour, and id get all of my stuff (barbie,tea cup set,ect.)and run as fast as i can inside because i convinced myself the devil would steal me!!!lol even my 10 yr. friend belived me?? i figured red meant blood and i thought the devil sucked your blood??? yeah weird huh? so id run to the door,slam it and lock both doors...lol hehe...... i was a weird one..lmao[3
We didn't go to church growing up, so I used to believe that the bible was an evil being in a black cloak that would come and visit you in the middle of the night and tell you things. I thought that because everyone at school always said things like "The bible says ____"
I believed God controlled us like we were on a big fooseball table, but the bars that connected us were invisible and bent in many directions