i used to believe

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I believed that god was something that surrounded the earth, like a shell, and when we sent up the space shuttle or a rocket or anything like that, it made a hole in god, and I always wondered if it hurt god when we did that

bob
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when i was a little girl i thought God looked like my grandma and dressed like the statue of liberty.

Anon
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My best friend and I met secretly to dig a hole in between our yards. We were convinced that we could dig down to where Satan lived and tell him that he was stupid and he would stop being mean.

About 2 or 3 feet in to digging the hole, a thunderstorm came, and at the first strike of lightning, we were convinced he was trying to get us so we ran home and didn't go near the hole for weeks.

K
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I always heard people say that "God is inside you all the time". So when my tummy growled and made a that springy noise, I used to think it was God on a pogo-stick.

Anon
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I used to believe that Jesus and all of the wise men lived under my bed.

wuteve
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I used to believe that if an ice cream truck drove too quickly or didn't play music, that it was being driven by the Devil and that if I tried to buy ice cream from him then he would kidnap me.

Anon
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For a long time after I had the Sunday school lesson on "God formed Adam from the dust of the earth" I thought parents made their babies out of dirt and the color of the dirt used was how skin color was determined

Elijah
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When I was little, there's was a carved portrait of St. Martin de Porres on a particular wall in my room. I used to think that the guy in the carved portrait was actually what God looked like. So, to me, God was a black man wearing white robes. However, I had a kid's Bible of the white Jesus variety (to those who still don't know: Jesus was a Middle Eastern man, what with being a Palestinian Jew and all) so I thought Jesus and all other characters from the Bible were actually legitimately pink people with funny noses. Thus, the Holy Trinity: black God, pink Jesus, and a white dove for the Holy Spirit.

Anon
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My sister thought there was a character in the bible called Baby Beezus and continued to think this until the age of 22.

Vicky
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My Dad used to always say "Born in a barn" if I left the door open. I believed this to be true and told all my friends I had been born in a barn like Jesus.

Z
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I used to believe that God looked exactly like the picture of Abraham Lincoln on an American penny.

Leah
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I used to believe that God resembled George Washington - specifically, the actor playing George Washington in a car dealership's President's Day sale.

Josh in L.A.
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I knew that Jesus died on a cross, and I concluded that this must have made
him rather cross. I also imagined the cross as a bed of nails leaning against
a wall, holding up a scowling Jesus.

Paul S.
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When I was a little girl, my parents told me that God could see and hear everything. From then on, I had this picture of God as a giant man who was completely covered in eyes - even the bottoms of his feet.

muddgirl
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WHen i was little, I thought God looked exactly like the fairy godmother from cinderalla!

dandi
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I was never religious, but I had a very Christian friend in first or second grade. We were sitting on the floor one day, watching a class video, and she was telling me how she was very upset because she'd been to church on Sunday and found out during the sermon that baby Jesus had gotten a splinter in his foot. So, for a long time, I pictured Heaven as having hardwood floors...

Anon
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I used to believe that God and Father Christmas were one and the same. When I was about 5, my siblings broke it to me that Father Christmas wasn't real. I think mum was farly shocked when I refused to go to church because God didn't exist.

That one took a while to clear up.

Anon
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When I was little, I used to scoot over in my bed to make room for my guardian angel to lay down and sleep. I figured after following around after me all day long, he'd be plenty tired and need a rest!

Trish
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By the immaculate conception of the virgin Mary, I used to think that that meant that she was a virgin and that Jesus somehow just appeared- as in Mary was never pregnant in the first place. I also felt bad for Joseph because Mary cheated on him with God.

Smart Alec
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I knew that Christmas was a birthday party for Jesus, and who comes on Christmas? Santa Claus. So of course, Santa was Jesus after he got old.

Elizabeth
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