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I used to think that the offerings in church were teleported directly up to heaven; I pictured the gold offering plates floating up into the sky.
my grandfather told me that protestants historically wore the color orange - so one day when I was wearing an orange shirt - I told my parents that I was just like the prostitutes.
I used to be scared to walk
into the sanctuary of our
church, alone b/c I always
thought that the pews were
made out of dust from hell
and tht if you sat on them
he would come out!
I used to believe that Sunday School was an ordinary, long school day for children of religious parents. This lead to an embarrassing situation where I showed pity for a friend who attended Sunday School, saying it was a shame that he only got one day off of school a week.
As a young child in church, I noticed that above the altar there was a large, white, round cement or plaster figure of a bird which represented the Holy Spirit. I was convinced that the organ music came out of this spot, even though I also knew that the organ was in the choir loft in the rear of the church.
As a young child attending Catholic church, I noticed that at the non-Catholic church down the street, two men would roll out a heavily-weighted sign to the middle of the road on Sunday. I thought the sign said "Stop for Protestants". Later, when my reading skills improved, I realized the sign said "Stop for Pedestrians".
When I was a child attending Catholic Mass, we had certain responses we had to say after the priest spoke. At the end of Mass, we were supposed to say "Thanks be to GOD"....................For the longest time I thought we were saying "Thanks, Speedy GOD" as if he sped the Mass up so that we wouldn't be bored.
When I was little and we'd go to mass, I would think that the confesssionals (we were Catholic) were the gateways to hell, and that if you were really bad, the priest would open another door on the other side, and you'd be in hell.
When I was little, I lived in a mostly Hispanic neighborhood where passion plays were held during Holy Week. On Good Friday 1967 or '68, there was a big procession that went right under our apartment window with a guy portraying Jesus carrying the cross, Roman soldiers, etc. I got the idea that Jesus came back to Earth every year to be crucified all over again.
I believed that the churches in town were often so close to each other because the ground they were built on was holy. Didn't know much about zoning laws...
I was in church one Sunday with my 4 year old daughter. The choir members would walk down the aisle singing at the beginning of the service. My daughter would stand on the pew so she could watch them as they came in. The preacher had not come out to the pulpit at the time. My daughter turned to me as said in a concerned tone " Momma, I see the angels singing, but where is God at?"
in catecism class, when we learned how to eat the body of christ. i thought it was actually jesus that had been dehydrated or freeze-dried. i always thought it was weird we were pracitsing cannibalsim
manna-the yummy food that God gave to his ppl thats full of nutrients and everything else everyone needs. well...for some reason i thot that it was whale. i thot that huge whales would fall from the sky and ppl would eat it. i didnt know that this wasnt true until LAST SUMMER when my dad told me that the ppl ate manna and QUAIL...i am 16...
i used to believe, that at funerals, the priest said,"In the name of the Father, the Son and into the hole he goes".
In my church there were coat hangers with buttons on them. My mom told me that the buttons controlled the fans on the ceiling so I would sit there pressing the buttons to try to turn on and off the fan but for some odd reason they were always broken!!!
When I was in kindergarten a priest came around on Ash Wednesday to put ashes on our heads. All I got out of his talk beforehand was that after he put the ashes on my head I was going to die in 40 days. I remember holding back the tears & wanting my mom.
I used to think that going for a ski holiday to Austria shortly after chrismas was a religious command, because the stable that Jesus was born in was located in that particular village. Also, people in in that Village practcally all had names like "Joseph" and "Maria".
A neighbor girl and I were convinced that leprosy was a very common thing. Started in Bible class, I'm certain. The lepers were dealt with by throwing them through a hole in the roof of a specal house without doors or windows, piling up inside and eventually dying. We identified several of these places in our neighborhood. Mean enough, but our greatest concern was that we could be easily infected with leprosity by being touched by older people, say 60+. Our understanding was that church was above all an institution that dealt with this threat by healing lepers. Apparently our teacher wasn't a good communicator.
Growing up in a Catholic home, I was a tad confused on a few things. I thought to have a baby you had to have a wedding in the church (even if you'd already been married there) and the preist prayed over the couple and if you prayed hard enough a baby would be sent down on a bolt of lightening.
I also thought Satan lived in our basement.....ah precious memories!
When I was little I used to thing that a lesbian was a religion oops!