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Before I could read, as a child I sang the song, "Lo in the grave he laid, Jesus my Savior." I wondered what was Jesus doing lying in the gravy?
I thought the hymn "Bringing in the Sheep" was "Bringing in the Sheets" and that people would sing it when taking dry laundry (sheets in particular) off the cloths line.
A few years ago I went carroling with a church group. We were singing "Hark, the Haroled Angels Sing." One line of either the second or third verse goes, "Hail the incarnate deity." When I first heard it, I thought they were saying guillatine instead of deity.
The same day, I found out out I'd been singing "What Child Is This" wrong for years. I always thought the chorus went, "Haste, haste to bring him love." I felt like a goofball when I realized that the correct word was laud instead of love. Really, that's not a word youhear every day.
I don't know if this qualifies as a belief, but when I was real little, we went to a church where they sang out of the old redback hymnal. If you're from the south and you're Baptist, you know what I'm talking about. Well, back then I had an obsession with words, and liked for people to read the dictionary to me. I loved the way certain words sounded, but hated other words. For some reason, I hated words that ended or sounded like they ended with ATION. That's weird, but it sounded ugly to me. I have no clue why.
I would get so irritated in church when we sang songs that had words like that. I didn't like singing those words, and I thought someone should rewrite the songs. When I told my grandmother about it, she sort of chuckled.
Now I love those gospel songs, but every now and then, I think of that, and feel like a goofball. I'm glad nobody remembers that.
Whe I was a kid, we would sing this one song, "Gladly The Cross I'd Bare." I always thought of it as, and even when I was older and knew better, as an inside joke, "Gladdy The Cross-Eyed Bear." I always pictured a cross-eyed bear romping around, as in a comic. I still get a laugh when I think of it.
I was convinced that the hymn 'Lord of the Dance' contained the lyrics 'Don Sept, whoever he may be, I am the Lord of the Dance said he' and pictured a Pied Piper type character leading children dancing all over the hills as he played a recorder. This persisted until I reached the Juniors and we were given our own hymn books... I still picture him thus!
When I was in pre-school, me and my best friend were taught the song "Up from the Grave He Arose"
I, not having the best hearing, thought that the line went " Up from the Gravy he arose-something about mashed potatoes
My sis used to love lasagna. When we went to church, we would sing "Hosanna in the highest" but with my sister's love for lasagna she thought it was "Lasagna in the highest". She actually never found out till the third grade.
My mother was raised Catholic at a time when the mass was still conducted in Latin, and picked up a rather garbled half-understanding of the language. So, at Christmastime, when everyone was singing "Adeste Fideles," she was absolutely convinced that "Venite adoremus" ("O come let us adore him") meant "Here comes the dormouse."
There's a song called "Take It All" by a group called Hillsongs United. A friend and I were singing this song in the car the other day. One of the lines is "Jesus, we're living for your name; we'll never be ashamed of you.... Our praise, and all we are today.... Take, take, take it all! Take, take, take it all!!"
Well, my mom was driving, and she turned around in her seat to stare at us and gave us this "WTF???" look.
Turns out that she'd misheard "take it all" as "Take, take, take it OFF!!!" My friend and I laughed so hard that we cried. Poor Mom...
I didn't have this idea, but some of my friends did. I'm Polish and for Holy Communion we learnt a hymn that ends with words "Jemu chwala i czesc" which means "Glory to Him and honor (to Him)". But in slang, especially kids slang but not only, "i czesc" means also end of discussion, kind of like saying "period." at the end of sentence. My friends thought the hymn meant "Glory to Him, period."
My grandparents have always attended a very traditional church, where they sing a lot of old hymns. One of the hymns they sing every week is "Gloria Patri" (or something like that), and when I was little, I read that in the bulletin, and was convinced that a woman named Gloria was going to speak in church that week. (I was always puzzled as to why her name was in the bulletin, but I never heard her preach)
At church we sang a hymn with the refrain, "Sing praises to His name, He forgets not His own." For the life of me, I couldn't figure out why I was being asked to praise God simply for remembering His own name.
There's a line in a school hymn that goes 'I wait with baited breath' - I thought that meant the hymn writer's breath smelled of maggots.
I used to think there was a place called Orientar, where the Three Kings came from. According to the Christmas Carol!
In school we had to sing "Jesus riding on a donkey." My brother, then four or five years old, came home proudly singing it...
Except that he thought Jesus was riding on a DOGGIE.
when i was younger my favorite church hyme was "Victory in Jesus" because i thought it said "he socked me and bopped me" instead of "he sought me and bought me".
I went to a church school and from the age of 4 was convinced the words of the hymn "All things Bright and beautiful" were followed by the line "All creatures stuffed with straw" I think its possibly due to early childhood visits to a local taxidermy museum...... what were my parents thinking of! Still dont know what comes next.
My husband used to believe that Joy to the World contained the lyrics 'let Earth receive her keys" instead of "let Earth receive her King"
A friend of mine spent a lot of time in church as a child. The hymn lyrics were displayed with an over-head projector. As the pages were swapped, a huge hand appeared mid-air. Logically, she assumed this was the hand of God.