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I used to teach the song "I'm camping in Canaan's Land, it's really grand!" One of my little pupils thought the last words were "It's Billy Graham!"
I used to believe that "Orientar" was a place, as in "We three kings of Orientar".
I used to think the song "Who Built the ark? Noah. Noah." was "Who built the Ark? No one, no one!"
you know that song that goes "Hosanna in the Highest" well i used to think it went, "Lasagna in the Hallways" i always thought it went that way until i asked my mom, "hey, mom? wouldnt the lasagna go bad if it was just sitting there all the time?" My mom: "what?" Me: "you know, the lasagna. in the hallway?" then i sang the song for her and she just started laughing.
when I was at primary school, they put the hymns on a projector for us to sing. I was to young to read along and keep up with the singing, so I sang what I heard. I had a picture of Jesus dancing on a sofa in a party because of the hymn 'Lord Of Th Dance'- 'Dance then, whereever you may be, I am the Lord of the Dance Settee'
I used to think that the song "When the Saints Go Marchin' In" was really "When the SINKS Go Marchin' In." For years I always pictured a line of dancing bathroom sinks whenever I heard or sang that song.
When they sang "When the roll is called up yonder" I always envisioned a piece of bread. It never occurred to me to wonder why a piece of bread would be called to heaven. I just took it on faith.
In a Presbyterian sunday school at the age of 8 or 9, I learned a hymn whose lyrics went:
[i]The Church's one foundation is Jesus Christ, our Lord.
She is the true creation of water and the Word.
From Heaven he came and sought her to be his holy bride.
With his own blood he bought her, and for her life he died.[/i]
The doctrines proposed in this text were rather unlike anything I had heard before. I gathered that Jesus was married, even if Jesus' wife's name was not preserved by history. Jesus came down from Heaven to marry her. Jesus' wife was created from water, no doubt by a process similar to Eve's creation from Adam's rib. Jesus' watery wife did something bad that Jesus took the rap for when he was crucified.
I used to think the words to "Amazing Grace" were "that saved a wrench like me" instead of "that saved a wretch like me". I wasn't quite sure what it meant to be a wrench and I didn't figure out the real words until my mom told me - after I'd sung the wrong words solo in front of my grandparents!
He is exalted the king is exalted on high,
he is exhausted the king is exhausted oh my!
And in the hymn
"He only can unlock the gate"
I used to feel sorry for Him, thinking that bit wasn't a very good job to have and that it was sad that that was all he could do.
As a kid, I had a Christmas song book, from which I learned the song "Rise Up Shepherd And Foller". At the time, I didn't recognize "foller" as a dialectical form of "follow". So I thought a "foller" was somebody who, like the shepherds, went to the manger to adore the Christ child. For years, I puzzled over who a "foller" was, and just how follers fit into the Christmas story.
I used to think that the three wise men from the song " We three Kings" were from space. In the song the real lyrics go
We three kings of Orient Are
Bearing Gifts, We traveled Afar
But i heard..
We three Kings of Orientar
Bearing Gifts We traveled Afar
i thought that they were the kings of some strange planet call orientar, after all if they came from a different planet they would have traveled afar...
My friend's little sister put her own surrealist spin on the carol "Ding Dong Merrily On High".
Last year she came out with the line "Gloria - Susanna is an extension" ...
One of the hymns we used to sing at church said, "fill the heavens with sweet accord, holy, holy, holy lord." When I was little I didn't know what "accord" was, and this led to some wierd associations in my mind. I knew that the type of jelly my family used in sandwiches was Concord, and that was the only other word I knew that sounded at all similar, so I figured that maybe this was just another way to pronouce it. It made sense to me, so I went along for years believing this hymn wanted God to fill Heaven with grape jelly.
Handel's "Messiah" includes "For we, like sheep, have gone astray". But Handel, a German, was a bit rough on his english phrasing, so the main line comes out as "For we LIKE sheep", which puzzled our Sunday School choir - we had nothing against sheep mind you, but few Australians would choose them as special mates. A couple of us decided on our own slant, incurring strife for singing, "For we like sheep, but I prefer dogs -..... etc". "But Sir, we were in tune and everything!"
In the song Silent night theres the part that says
"round yon virgin mother and child
Holy infant so tender and mild"
up until 2 years ago I thought it was " Holy imbecile tender and wild"
if thats not bad enough i also went to a catholic school
we used to sing about cheese. 'my cheeses, nice flavour...' recognise it?!?
When my sister was about 6 at Christmas time, she came home from school and sang us a carol she had just learned.
She started alright with 'Ding Dong merrily on high'
but unfortunately finished with 'Hosannah in his trousers'
My niece attended a church-run preschool even though my sister and brother-in-law were not religious. The preschool taught the class the song "Jesus Loves Me". My niece thought that song contained the line "...because Feifel tells me so" instead of because the bible tells me so. She had seen the video Feifel Goes West so many times that she was sure that the little mouse, Feifel, told people that Jesus loved us.
I come from Yorkshire and when we would sing Jingle Bells at Christmas I thought 'a one hose open sleigh' was 'a one horse serpent sleigh' because of the strong accents. I spent most of my childhood thinking that Father Christmas road a dragon.