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As a kid, I had a Christmas song book, from which I learned the song "Rise Up Shepherd And Foller". At the time, I didn't recognize "foller" as a dialectical form of "follow". So I thought a "foller" was somebody who, like the shepherds, went to the manger to adore the Christ child. For years, I puzzled over who a "foller" was, and just how follers fit into the Christmas story.
I used to think that the song "When the Saints Go Marchin' In" was really "When the SINKS Go Marchin' In." For years I always pictured a line of dancing bathroom sinks whenever I heard or sang that song.
When i was quite little (about 7 or 8) I thought that the works to the hymn 'Kum-bah-yah' were 'Cucumber, my Lord...' I always wondered why the lady sitting next to me in church was glaring at me...
When I was at school we sang the hymn 'Lord of the Dance' in assembly. I thought the lyrics went;
"Die then, wherever you may be
I am the Lord of the Dance said he
And I'll kill you all, wherever you may be
And I'll kill you all with the dance, said he."
I honestly thought that Jesus wanted to kill me. It didn't really bother me though and I'm not sure if that was because I just accepted it as normal or because I didn't really believe in God anyway.
In the hymn 'Jerusalem' I thought the line was "'Til we have built Jerusalem in England's green, unpleasant land"
It actually talks about England's green AND pleasant land. I always thought it was quite mean for a patriotic song.
I also used to think God had a pet tortoise. Why? Well, one of the hyms we sang went "Great things he hath tortoise". What would you have thought?
MY BROTHER LIKED THE SONG "HOW GREAT THOU ART." WHEN THEY SANG IT IN CHURCH. HE ACTUALLY THOUGHT THEY WERE SINGING "I'LL BREAK THOU ARM."
We had to sind carols at school, but not having any clue about religiou stuff, I used to be sure that the words were..
"and in thy dark streeets CHIIINA "
because obviously its dark in China....
"and in thy dark streets shineth", just doesn`t work for me, even now
In the Christmas song silent night, the part that says, "'Round young Virgin..." I used to think that it was, "Round Jonh Virgin." So in Sunday School one morning when the teacher asked us to draw a poicture that rlates to the song I drew a little round man.
Iin the Christmas song, Hark the herald angels sing, when they say in excelsis deo, I used to think that they were singing Inn at Chelsie's stable, seeing as there was no room in any other inn, so they had to stay at the Inn in Chelsie's stable!
When I was little, I thought the lyrics for silent night. "so tender and mild" was referring to baby Jesus like he was a piece of meat. I was really confused as to why they were going to eat Jesus.
Me and my sister both thought for ages that the words to a hymn we used to sing at school "For I am the Lord of the Dance, said he", went "For I am the Lord of the down setee". We were a bit confused about this and worried because we didn't have a setee in our house - did that mean we couldn't have Jesus in our house too?
In one church hymn the words are- most highly favoured lady, but I used to think it was most highly flavoured gravy.
I used to think that the words of a popular christmas carol were...
Oh Come all ye faithful
Joyful and Triangle
When I was little, I thought the hymn that goes, "Hosanna in the highest heaven...' meant someone called Hosanna (because the name is like Rosanna) was a woman in heaven who is like an agony aunt who when you go to confession helps you sort out your problems!
When I was a child, the song "The First Noel" had me thinking that the word "certain" could be a verb. The line "The first Noel the angels did say was to certain poor shepherds in fields where they lay" meant to me that the poor shepherds were uncertain about something, so the angels came to "certain" them, that is, to make them certain.
When I was a Girl Guide, we would start every meeting by singing a song that included the line 'God is nigh'. For about two years, I was sure I was singing 'God is nice' until one of the leaders kindly corrected me. And then laughed.
again, as a child i used to sing a gospel hymn called "joshua fought the battle of Jerichoe and the walls came tumbling down"
until i was about 6 i would belt out in church "Joshua bit the bottle of cherry-coke and the walls came tumbling down"
Whe I was a kid, we would sing this one song, "Gladly The Cross I'd Bare." I always thought of it as, and even when I was older and knew better, as an inside joke, "Gladdy The Cross-Eyed Bear." I always pictured a cross-eyed bear romping around, as in a comic. I still get a laugh when I think of it.
I thought the hymn "Bringing in the Sheep" was "Bringing in the Sheets" and that people would sing it when taking dry laundry (sheets in particular) off the cloths line.