school

I used to believe…

When I was around 3, my family moved (we moved when I was so young because my parents didn't like the school system in the town.) Even before we moved, I went to preschool in the town we were moving to. For some odd reason, I didn't like school. (come on, it's preschool for goodness's sake) I believed that when we moved into the new house, I wouldn't have to go to school. Don't ask me why I thought this.
Boy, was I dissapointed when I found out I still would have to go.

I used to believe…

When I was in kindergarten, I believed that all the nuns were really men. One day I stood at the bottom of the stairs and tried to look up one of their skirts to see - only problem was I didn't know exactly what I was looking for - pants maybe? The nuns were not real happy with me.

I used to believe…

In history class the "underground railroad" was mentioned. Although I understood it was used to bring slaves north to freedom, I thought it was a hidden railroad which actually ran underground.

I used to believe…

When I was about 5 I believed that my teacher cycled around to the houses of all the children in the class to look in the windows and make sure they were asleep by 7pm! I was terrified if I was up beyond that!! God knows what my parents said to me to make me believe that!

I used to believe…

when I was younger I used to think that if you didn't pass your grade in school you had to sit all alone in class the whole summer long without food and other stuff

I pledge allegiance
To my dad in the United States of America
And for all the public
And kittens stand
One nation
Under God
With livers and justice for frogs

I used to believe that when we said the Pledge of Allegiance, we were actually pledging to be soldiers.
So I went home and I said, "Mommy, don't send me to a war!!"
And she looked at me as if I had four eyes. "What happened?"
"They made us say the pledge of Allegiance!"
So she explained it to me. And since I had told EVERYONE in my little class that we were going to some "war", I had to explain it to them too.
Stupid on my part, lol.

I used to believe…

When i was in the 5th grade my teacher handed the whole class a sheet of paper that had classes that we'd need to take for the 6th grade and SHOP was on the list. Me and my friends were all happy because we thought that SHOP class meant that we'd get to shop at a mall or something....so the 1st day of 6th grade i asked my mom for 100bucks..she asked why and i said "mom dont you know? i got shop class today". she laughed and gave me a quarter.....

I used to believe…

When i was younger i got told that if i skipped school the ''school boarder'' would come and get me. I heard it as the ''school balder'' and i imagined a bald man in a black cloak marching up my drive , with two huge men carrying crowbars, to come and drag me out of bed. I was weird. yep yep.

I was with my parents when they took my older brother to college orientation, "college".

Where we parked is what got me. There was a handicapped sign on the side of the building near our parking spot.

For many years after that, every time I saw a handicapped sign, I always thought "Man, there sure are alot of colleges around here."

I used to believe…

In grade two i thought teachers were aliens who crash landed on earth millions of years ago and they pretended school was for getting a good education but they actually wanted to kidnap all the smartest kids and force them to be their slaves and fix their spce ship.

I used to believe…

When I went to pre-school, I thought that the name of it was actually "pretty school". This is how I pronounced it, and how I heard everyone else pronounce it. And I never thought, hey, this isn't where kids go to get pretty or anything like that. That's just what it was called for some reason.

I used to believe…

In Junior's school (6-11 yrs old) we seemed to have loads of fire drills. I used to stand in the cold and quietly seethe at the stupidity of our teachers...

I was convinced for some reason that one of them had gone into the staff room during lessons and burnt a piece of toast which set off the fire alarm.

This might have been because this was how our smoke alarm at home always went off - I wondered how long it can take for someone to wave a newspaper under the fire alarm to shut it up so we could go back inside. It didn't even matter how many times we were told we were having a fire drill 'some time next month', I would invariably whisper to whoever was infromt of me in line 'they burnt their bloody toast again!'

I used to believe…

In elementary school, I used to think that the staff were hiding stuff (if I knew what at the time, I've since forgotten; it may have been captives) behind the mysterious locked doors that seem to be in every school.

I always used to sneeze during the Plege. On a snow day, in the moring, i snezzed. I looked at the c,lock. It was a round the time that we WOULD be saying the pledge in class! I became terified that my body had become accustomed to sneezing at that time, and i would AKWAYS, my whole life, sneeze at that time.

I used to believe…

As a young child, one of my friends and i decided for some reason, that all teachers turned into telephone poles at night. we asked our sports teacher if this was true. one night, while driving along, we noticed that one of the poles only had one light working and decided this must be our teacher, as she only had one eye, having lost the other in to a squash ball.

I used to believe…

When I was in kindergarten I saw a movie which showed a college lecture hall with hundreds of students all crowded together and only one teacher. I assumed that that's what first grade was going to be like. When I got to first grade I saw that I was wrong, but I still honestly believed that sixth grade was going to be like that.