school

I Used to believe that teachers lived in school and didn't have lives

I used to believe…

In Iowa, instead of having Kindergarten pre-registration, they call it "Kindergarten Round-up". I remember being very disappointed that there weren't any cowboys or horses there.

I remember when I was in 1st grade we had a substitute teacher who informed the entire class in all seriousness that she had eyes in the back of her head. Not only that but EVERY teacher had eyes in the back of their head. As she walked around the room I remember despertaly trying to see her eye balls on the back and all I could see was hair. I figured if I couldn't see her eye balls then they couldn't see me.

i used to think that teachers knew everything. I MEAN EVERYTHING]... like, all the information known to god. so when i asked a question to my 1st grade teacher and she said, "hmm... im not sure.." i was shocked and i came home and cried for days...i felt for some reason that my teacher had let me down.

I used to believe…

When I was in Elementary school I used to believe that minimum days were actually called M&M days, and that those days you would go to school and the teachers would give out M&Ms. I was greatly disappointed.

I used to think when you were in High School gym class and you had to change your clothes, you went inside the locker and closed it, then changed your clothes so no one saw you in your underwear.

I used to believe…

After I started school, I used to think you could only talk when you raised your hand. So I started raising my hand at home to ask my mom if I could go to the bathroom.

I used to believe…

in my lower grades at school, i used to be appalled when i saw the word "sex" on my test papers. in the blank beside it, i would write "NO" and then continue on to circle the "m" for "mail" since my family didn't own a "fax machine" and this was my best guess at what was being asked of me. it wasn't until high school that a teacher told me "f" stood for female.. whoops!

I still remember when I was a little lass in kindergarten and say the pledge, in the part "For which it stands," I thought it said "For witches stands." I imagined a bunch of little witches sitting down. Don't ask.
:)

I thought that the Pledge of Allegiance line was "...one nation, under dog, indivisible..." I pronounced this proudly until I learned how to read and realized that it is "God" we are under. Good to know.

I used to believe teachers where ghost or had supernatrual powers because if I turn my head for a moment they would be somewhere else instead of the first place. Like from the front of the classroom to the back in 3 seconds.

I use to believe that when I had a medical at school by the school nurse she would examin my testicles and if I had an erection she would whack my penis off with a ruler for being rude.

I used to believe…

In elementary school most kids during class would raise their hand to use the restroom. I used to believe that teachers never had to use the restroom 'cause they never took a bathroom break during class even when the teacher's aide was available to watch the class when she was gone.

I used to believe…

When I was at junior school, my mother encouraged me to do well so i could pass the 11 plus. Unfortunately, she used the old name - she called it the 'scholarship'. I thoght that, if I did well, I had to become a boy sailor and go away to sea at the age of 11!

I used to believe…

When I was in kindergarten, there was this talent show where we would dance with partners. My partner was Angela. One day my teacher came up to me and said that Rachel would be my partner because Angela was absent. I had never heard the word "absent" before, and for some reason I assumed that it meant that Angela sat in a dark room all day by herself. I saw an image of her in my mind - it was dark except for an orangeish light. I wondered why she'd want to be absent because it sounded weird and boring.

I used to believe that you really had a permanent record that would follow you throughout your adult life. All my misdeeds of childhood would somehow prevent me from getting a good job.