school

In 1st grade the teacher told us on our first day that we could get detention for misbehaving, and I was terrified of having it happen to me. I thought detention meant you weren't allowed to go home that day and you had to stay at school all night copying lines onto the chalkboard until class started again the next morning. One day I finally did get detention - I was whistling during class and didn't admit to it when the teacher asked who was whistling; but a girl one desk over told on me. My impending detention was the only thing I could think about for the rest of class. Needless to say, I was VERY surprised and underwhelmed when the teacher told me, 5 minutes after everyone had left, that my detention was over and that I could go home.

Sometimes at school, the teachers would say things I hadn't told them and would say things like "a little bird told me you're getting a cat" and stuff. I thought it was because they were psychic, but in reality they'd been passing notes with my parents.

When I was 9 years old I believed that the teachers were people who spend all day caring for children and helping them in everything like a nanny but I realized that not only were babysitters who with each one learned different things

Teachers lived at the school

When I first went to School, I thought it was like hell. It's not as a bad as I thought, hehe

When I was in gym class at school I always thought they told us to stand "shoulder with the part" and I remember thinking "what does that even mean?" and just looked at what everyone else was doing to figure it out. I was much much much older when I had the epiphany that it's shoulder WIDTH apart, which makes perfect sense.

When I was in preschool (3 or 4), we used to have a gym that we used an old dark staircase to get to. The teachers didn't want us to fall so they sang a song about keeping your hand on the railing. It went to the tune of "if you're happy and you know it" except the words were "keep your hand on the railing on the wall". My child brain thought that they were telling you to put your hand on the railing and then put it on the wall. So I was constantly switching between railing and wall. I only recently realized that they meant that the railing was on the wall.

I used to believe that all teachers lived at school!

When I was in kindergarten, my teachers occasionally mentioned Mr. Mont, the school principal. A good ways into the year, we were told Mr. Mont was dropping by the classroom for a visit. And so he did, but imagine my disappointment when he turned out to be a human... since, for some strange reason, I'd been expecting a kangaroo. I'll never know why, but up until the point I actually saw him in person, every mention of Mr. Mont conjured up the mental image of a real, live kangaroo who was led around the school on a leash.

The first time I heard the pledge of allegiance was on my first day of kindergarten, and I didn't know what it was. I thought that it was a spell, and that when it was done the whole class would be teleported to the Statue of Liberty and we would spend the rest of the school year there, only learning about the U.S.

We used to start each day in my kindergarten class with the Pledge of Allegiance. Being a kindergartner, I had no idea what exactly it meant, but I did understand enough to know it meant I was agreeing to SOMETHING. So, to avoid accidentally committing myself to something major before I understood it, I would just mouth the words, letting everyone else's voice cover for me.

When I was about four, our kindergarden teacher told us that there would be a fire simulation in the next few weeks when the firemen would come to our school. I was terrified, because I thought they would set our school on fire to teach us what to do in case a real fire started, and I was unsure whether the firemen would be able to deal with the fire before everything was destroyed.

My mom used to think "preschool" was called "pretty school" until a few years later.

When I was in P.E in Grammar school we played a version on volley ball that I learned later was actually called "Bombadier " (sp?). I misunderstood what the teacher said and thought it was called "Mama Deer"-I couldn't figure out for years what mother deer had to do with a ball game.When someone finally figured out what I was saying they thought it was hilarious.I felt like an idiot.

When I was in first grade my best friend's mom was our teacher. They would always stay late after school for after school care but I just assumed that all teachers and their kids lived at the school. When I asked my friend which room she slept in she said, "You shouldn't sleep during school!" So then I figured that even though they lived at school all the time, they weren't allowed to sleep there. I believed this until 5th grade.

I used to believe that the president graded standardized tests. I'm not sure why...