school

my dad used to tell me that teachers had no first names and that is why we call them MS. and Mr. that was till i realized that he and my mom were both teachers and they both had first names.

When I was in kindergarten and just learning about electricity and water, I turned the computer on after I washed my hands, and they were still slightly wet, so I lived in fear that entire day that the computer would get revenge on me by secretly electrocuting and killing me at some random point during the day.

i used to think that teachers used to live in school and they used to rip out pages from a book and wear them as clothes. they alos used to drink their own pee because i never soo them going out of class to go to the bathroom.

when i was little i thought my teacher was a real witch because i thought they lived in school and they couldn't leave, and one day i saw her at target and i was scared of her ever since

I used to believe that numbers stopped at 99. To prove me wrong, I distinctly remember my older sister using our basement chalkboard to write every single number from 0 to 99, and then writing 100. This may or may not have convinced me at the time, but eventually I did learn the truth.

When I first started school I didnt understand that you learned to read and write. I thought you drank a potion then you could magically read and write perfectly

I used to believe that when you dropped a book in the bookdrop outside the school library, the book travelled to a magical land where all books lived in peace and harmony. Imagine how heartbroken I was when I found out that the bookdrop just led to the librarian's office!

When I was in first grade, I used to believe that the clear, flat marbles we used to decorate our vases with were contact lenses. I had seen my aunt wear contacts before, and I was convinced they were the same thing. In my classroom show-and-tell session, I showed the kids how many contact lenses I had. I was very offended when my teacher told me that I was mistaken.

I started swimming competitively when I was 8. I had an autograph from an Olympic swimmer who swam at my club, which he had signed "Ian Crocker, USA". I figured that anybody who competed in swimming was supposed to write their name with the country after it, and about half of my third grade papers say "Maggie Eismeier, USA"

A long time ago, my brother heard from a friend that if you pull the fire alarm at school, black ink squirts out and marks you, so that they know who pulled it. I made a fool out of myself in school, because apparently it's not true. XD I can't believe I believed it until 17!

In first grade, My teacher told me that I shouldn't lean against the chalkboard because a former student who did the same was smashed by the chalkboard as thin as paper and in order to visit people he would have to fold up and mail himself. I was amazed and when I told my dad, he said she was kidding, but I believed her for years.

I used to believe that if I hid under my desk with one hand covering my face and the other covering the back of my neck I would be safe from nuclear attack at school.

When I was in 3rd grade my english assignment was to read an incomplete story and at the end I was supposed to "draw a conclusion" of how the story ended. My mom was out of town so my dad helped me. We drew a picture of how we think the story ended. I think my teacher laughed the rest of the year after I turned that assignment in!

When I was in first grade, we had our first fire drill. I knew it had to do with practicing what to do in case there was a real fire, but I couldn't figure out what the "drill was for." I thought for certain that giant drills were going to come out of the ceiling and put a huge hole in the center of our desks. (I'm really not sure how that would put out the fire.) When we had our first fire drill, I couldn't wait to see the giant holes in the desks! After finding the room intact, I just assumed that the drills were magical and didn't leave holes in the desks. I think I believed this until I was 9. D'oh!

I always said it right, but I had a few weird beliefs about the pledge.

For one thing, my family was democrat (and I thought political party was genetic so I was automatically a democrat), so when I learned about republicans and democrats in third grade I thought it was wrong to say the part that goes "and to the Republic for which it stands" because I wasn't republican! Why do they get a line in the pledge, and not the democrats?

When I was younger, in first grade or so, I used to wonder where teachers went when we left. My teacher had a big supply closet, and I thought she lived in there. Every time she opened the door I would look for her food, and bed. If she even used those! I was so astounded that they didn't get to go home!