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When I was about 9 or 10, my dad was the coach of a high school baseball team and I was convinced I was smarter than his players because I would hear all the coached talk in the office about how the players were idiots and the dumb things they did. Of course being a good student myself, I knew I must be much smarter than his high school players.
So at practice I would borrow their math and science books from their book bags and find problems I could do, as proof I was smarter than them. It was always a mystery to me why there were letters and numbers in their math problems, and I would think to myself, well no wonder they're always getting things wrong... they don't even use numbers to do math!
I used to think that if a child wore glasses, that child was smart. This didn't mean that I thought children who didn't wear glasses were not smart, just that wearing glasses was a reliable indicator. Then, Mary Beth C. got glasses, and I KNEW she wasn't smart. There went the glasses=smart theory.
When I was five, I was really excited for my first day of school. The months leading up to kindergarten I would constantly ask my mom how many days were left, if the first day was tomorrow etc. Then the first day of school happens, I have an excellent time, don't stop talking about it for the whole afternoon.
The next day my mom goes to wake me up early again. I was really reluctant to get up and I asked my mom why she was waking me up.
My mom replied, "To go to school, honey."
In my most sincere, no-duh voice I said;
"Ugh, Mom, I did that yesterday."
I used to believe that when I went to school I would learn how to have long conversations on the phone, like my mama....
I used to think making straight A's in school was literally writing A's straight.
When I was 6-7 years old, I knew an officer named Benito, one day my spanish teacher mentioned the death of the mexican hero Benito Juarez , I was shocked and I told to all the class and the teacher that Benito was alive and he worked as an officer near my house.
I used to have a terrible fear of fire drills because loud noises tended to startle me. On more than one occasion, I had overheard a staff member mention the words "fire drill", and soon after, one occurred. (Most likely they were talking about one they knew was planned later that day.) At one point, there happened to be a fire drill while I was looking at a book about them. Once, another student asked if there was going to be a fire drill, and a teacher said "there's no fire drill." I got scared anyway, and sure enough, later on the teacher was proven wrong. This made me not want to mention fire drills for fear of causing one.
As a kid I used to believe that when you sharpened your pencil, the eraser on the pencil grew.
Until I was on fift grade I used to believe that world map was only showing have of the world as the globe is meant to be round and the map was flat.
When I was in grade school we had a history lesson about the Civil War and Reconstruction. The teacher told us the United States had split apart and then after the war the Southern states had to rejoin the rest of the country. I thought she meant literally split apart. I imagined people using big boards to nail the country back together.
My friends and I thought that grades in school kept going on forever and that even adults had to go to school every day. Only after we asked a teacher what grade she was in did we learn that the last grade is 12th grade.
My brother was six and getting ready for his first spelling test. He told me he had the system beat. He was going to memorize what was in the book! He seriously believed he was the first person to come up with this way of cheating. I didn't know what to say. I was younger than him, so I didn't know if this was cheating or what.
When I was 7 and I didn't go to school, I would always imagine my name appearing on the news saying i'm dead and so on... Because I thought that everytime a person wasn't at school they would appear on the news
When I was ten or eleven our teacher took my class to the library and the librarian explaind how to write a bibliography. Then she gave us books to work on. I thought we were taking these notes because the librarian needed them for her catalogue, and I couldn't understand why our teacher kept sending us back to do it over and over again. Of course, on my essays I would just write the name of the author and the book title at the end.
In Kindergarten a girl had stopped coming to school and we later learned that she had moved. I didn't know that "moved" meant "moved to a different house", so I thought that if I sat still for a very long time and then suddenly moved my body really fast it would mean that I didn't have to go to school anymore.
I used to believe that little creatures lived inside desks and tables and were always busy hammering and sawing and constructing amazing cities inside the furniture. I would listen to them whenever I got the chance. It was a long time before I figured out the noises were simply vibrations from pencils writing on paper, people walking past and etc.
I was often bored in school during tests and so would fashion elaborate scenes in my head about the circles I needed to shade in. My favorite was that it was a mummy's tomb with a curse and the explorers had to 'escape' before 'smoke' filled it. Complete with screams while they died
I thought when you are writing you just capitalized whatever you words you thought were important. Later I found out they actually did write that way a long time ago.
When I was little my mom told me that the school police would see me if I went out of the house while I was home sick from school. I always imagined FBI agents with radios and such. I was always terrified to go grocery shopping or such whenever I was home sick because I thought the school police would find me!
For a while during recess at school (around 1st or 2nd grade) I had this hole I dug that I kept trying to make bigger (with my bare hands). It never got very big, but I was convinced that eventually I would find something valuable like gold.