the best beliefs ever

I used to ask my dad why he could tell me to do things, and he always told me it was because he is older than me, to which I responded "Just you wait until I'm older than you!"

Anon (from grown-ups : family)

When i was a kid, my family flew to florida from virginia every summer. When we got above the clouds, I would always look out the window. I thought the clouds were snow, and wondered why we always flew over antarctica to get to florida.

Joe (from transport : aeroplanes)

because i always saw a lot of birds perched on telephone lines, i used to believe that they were built so that the birds could rest

Anon (from animals : birds)

I used to believe that limes were baby lemons. I would pick the little "limes" off of the lemon tree for food. I was 21 when I found out that they were not the same fruit.

Anon (from food : general)

I used to think that the "government" were a bunch of people that worked underground and our poop went by them on a conveyer belt. Probably because I asked my dad where does my poop go when I flushed it? And he said the government takes care of it.

Jena (from body functions : weeing and pooing)

You know how when you're little your parents tell you that you can be anything you want when you grow up? Well I took that literally and wanted to be an elephant when I grew up.

Carina (from grown-ups : getting older)

When I was little, I didn't understand the concept of years changing how old people were. I thought that since I was born in January and my little sister (by four years) was born in February, that was what determined our ages. When I learned my Grandma was born December 23rd, I exclaimed, "Grandma! You're older than Jesus!"


She didn't like that.

Claire (from people : birthdays)

When I was little, I believed that if a word was written on a line by itself it would get lonely. I used to make my sentence bigger so it wouldn't be on its own.
I also thought that the i's and t's would get jealous of the order I dotted and crossed them.

Jemma-Louise (from language : spelling)

When 5 years old we had a toaster which had a dial with a light brown to dark brown guide around the knobs to change how long it toasted for. I thought this was an accurate guide to the colour the toast would be, so I carefully adjusted the dial and toasted it only to find burnt toast. I would then put the same toast back in and change the dial to lighter thinking the toast would become whiter.
I repeated this process until the toaster caught fire.

Daniel (from food : general)

I have a distinct memory of sitting on the school bus coming home from kindergarten one day and being absolutely convinced I was going to die. Why? Because the bus driver was drinking from a can of Coke and I knew from PSAs on television that drinking and driving killed people.

Kristina (from transport : cars)

I used to think that the "Wrong Way" signs that indicate one-way streets were meant to tell you that you personally were heading the wrong direction to your destination. I asked my mom once how that sign knew where people we going...

Kristina (from transport : road signs)

When I was little, I thought that when you broke your arm or leg, it literally broke off of your body. (The cast was there to hold in back on, you see.) I remember being absolutely terrified when my grandpa broke his arm when I was about 5 or 6 - I thought they'd have to glue his detached arm back on!

Kristina (from body parts : general)

I didn't want to get tall when I was younger because I believed that I would fall over.

Gabi (from grown-ups : getting older)

When I was little, I used to make a nest out of towels and sit on plastic eggs with my brother, thinking that sooner or later they would hatch. They always did with the help of our Mother, and had money inside of them. I thought that the eggs we cooked for breakfast were defective, because they contained no money.

Anon (from animals : birds)

When i was little i always wanted to be helpful! One day i wanted to help my dad mow the lawn. Him being in a hurry told me that i could get my toes chopped off. To this day i still scared to move the lawn.

Shea (from at home : around the house)

My grandma wore dentures, and when I was five she told me that if I opened my own mouth wide enough my teeth would pop out too. I spent hours trying to get my teeth out of my mouth.

Anon (from body parts : general)

When i was 3 me and my friend would always feed her dogs what ever we were eating. Her mother told us that if we kept feeding them human food they would stand up on two legs and walk around like humans! I believed this untill i was 12 years old.

:) (from animals : cats and dogs)

I used to believe that credit cards had compressed money in them. I thought that every time you swiped your credit card the machine would cut open the credit card, pull just the right money out and seal it back up.

Anon (from the world : money)

when i was younger my mam used to say that the tv didnt work when it was sunny outside, so we had to go outside and play...me and my brothers believed her for years

Anon (from people : lies)

when i was little, thinking about growing taller made me sad because that meant i would be farther away from my feet, who happened to be my very good friends at the time.

Jackie (from body parts : general)