sex

I once found a condom wrapper in my parent's drawer but I was a good kid and didn't touch it( thank god!). As I got older, my mom saw this beanie when we were out shopping and she tried it on and said,"Ew, looks like a condom." The store was real quiet and I totally broke the silence by asking her loudly."WHATS A CONDOM?" When I got even older, me and this girl were talking and we somehow got to the subjects of condoms and the guy behing us, named Michael, was snooping in our convorsation and I was like, "Do you even know what a condom is?" And he said, "Yeah, it's ketchup!" Me and the girl started laughing so hard we died in class. He thought we meant condiments.

I used to believe…

Women became pregnant from eating pimento olives.

I used to believe…

When my sister was about sixteen my college educated mother found she was using tampons and became hysterical.She called the Dr. and shrieked about how my sister wasn't a virgin anymore and "no decent man would marry her". The Dr. must have thought mom was a nutcase but he finally calmed her down by giving his word as a doctor.My sister almost got grounded for a month!

I used to think the "merital act" was a complex ritual that couples in lab coats did to get babies. I wasn't entirely off, since my idea of it was based on textbooks, and a Catholic documentary about embryonic stem cells.

I used to believe…

Growing up with religious parents, I got a bit confused about conception. I'd been told that God makes babies, but I'd also been told that parent made them (and that the mother would get pregnant). I had a pretty active imagination and with logic, I reasoned that when a couple decide they want a kid, an angel would fly down and take them up to heaven, where they would meet with God and design a baby. I pictured them going over designs and make blueprints. Afterwards, I believed the angel would take them back to Earth, and God would create the baby from the blueprints and then the baby would appear in the mother's stomach.
Sounds really lame now, but I was truly convinced and it makes me laugh when I remember it now.

I used to believe…

When I was 9 or 10, I overheard my sisters making fun of lesbians and I asked what they were. My sister said that they were people from the country of Lesbos. I got really angry because it didn't seem right to make fun of someone because of where they came from!

I thought that a man and woman became pregnant by lying in a bed together. I couldn't really understand why my mom wasn't pregnant all the time, but it seemed plausible at the time.

I used to think that your body would automatically get pregnant once you got married. I didn't know what sex was...My friend told me tho and I was totally disgusted.

I used to think that women got pregnant because God directly put a baby in them, and that an unplanned pregnancy meant that God made you pregnant but forgot to tell you about it beforehand.

I hadn't heard of oral sex yet, but I had seen old movies where people smoke after sex. I came to the conclusion that flavored condoms were made for non smokers to suck on after sex as an alternative to cigarettes.

I had no idea that the phrase 'pop your cherry' had anything to do with having sex for the first time. I thought it was some weird kind of foreplay involving cherries.

I used to believe…

During sex ed in high school, one of my classmates asked our teacher why condoms have flavors and if you were supposed to eat them. My teacher didn't know what to say at first but eventually said that you were supposed to use it like a lollipop. I don't think my classmate got it, though.

I'm female, and once upon a time I thought a penis was the size of a finger, flimsy and skinny.

I became terrified of them when I realized they were much bigger than that...

I believed that you could get pregnant by drinking someone's wee. This was because I read a book in which they said something about a boy giving the girl a drink, which tasted wonderful, and then a few paragraphs later she was pregnant. So naturally I assumed it was the drink. I was 9 at the time and my friend quickly cleared that up.

I used to believe…

When I was in elementary school my mom tried to explain puberty to me and I vastly misinterpreted the facts. For several years I believed that when girls first got their periods, they would just continually bleed for the rest of their lives until they got old and ran out of blood and then they died.

I used to believe that babies were like puppies and kittens in that they couldn't open their eyes until they were finished forming. I believed that until I was a teenager!