sex

I used to believe…

when i was little i thought a man had a baby seed in his stomach and through sex the seed would jump through the mans belly button into the woman where it would grow

I grew up an extremely sheltered and overprotected girl. One day, when I was perhaps in 6th or 7th grade, my father and I were discussing some aspect of nature and survival. Figuring I was just being logical (and not knowing their true function), I told him a woman's breasts were there as extra fat to provide nutrition should the woman become malnurished or not have enough to eat. My father just laughed and explained their true function was to feed babies. So I asked where the breasts were on animals (since they don't protrude), and he explained how some animals had them inside rather than out.

I must have watched a cesarean section on television. Anyway I got the idea that all babies were born by the doctor cutting open the mama's tummy and taking the baby out. When another child suggested a certain body opening that babies came out through, I thought that this person was being horribly disgusting and had a sick sense of humor.

I thought that boys had a bone inside of their penises that would pop out and make them hard. If you stuck something inside the hole and then turned the guy on, it would break the bone and the guy would never get an erection again. This was discussed on the playground as a form of torture.

I was over a friend house once, and her moms boyfriend was spending a long time in the bathroom. My friend then told me that she thought he had his comma. In her mind, if a woman got a period, and man would get a comma.

i thought that babies were made when the bride and groom kissed on their wedding day and that in order to have multible children, a couple had to get married multible times. i once asked my mom why my two older brothers werent the ring bearers when they had me.

I used to believe…

when i was little i believed that if a girl went to the bathroom and didn't flush the toilet and then a boy went to the bathroom that they would make a baby--i thought there were loads of sewer babies. for years i would never walk anywhere near storm drains.

I used to believe…

My friend didn't know what a condom was, (he thought it was some sort of candy), so one day he told his mom, "When you go to the grocery store, could you get me some mint-flavored condoms?" You should have seen the look on his mom's face...

I used to believe…

When I was a kid, my sister told me a story about a guy who had raped a young girl. I didn't know what raped meant, so I thoguht she meant raked. I pictured a guy running a rake across the girls back. How awful I thought to myself.

I used to believe that guys dicks had to be kept in their pocket if they were too long. When i was 13, the guy i liked had a bump in his pocket and he was writing something and he asked me to take it out of his pocket, and i said "oh, i dont think i should. dont you need it?" and he said, "yeah, thats why i'm asking you to take it out." i was like "okay, but i dont want to hold it for too long.."

it was his wallet. i was so embarrased.

I used to think used tampons were stuffed mice and I always wanted a mouse so I actually picked the dirty one off the garage floor near trash can and showed it off to my buddies and their parents....... NOW I realized why grown ups gave me some surprised looks!!! VERY DISGUSTING!

I used to believe tampons are for dental uses cuz sometimes dentists had to put the cotton rolls in my mouth between my teeth and cheek to absorb my spit so I wont drool. When I lost my tooth at home it was bleeding alot so I was looking for toilet paper but we ran out of it so I found tampons and pushed the applicator to get cotton part out and PUT THEM IN MY MOUTH to absorb blood!! I walked around in the house with string sticking out of my mouth until my mom pulled it out then throw in trash and handled me paper towel.

I was at public restroom I saw the 25 cent machine on the wall that was labeled "FEMININE NAPKINS" and "TAMPONS" I have no idea what they were, so I brought both of them to find out what they really were. I thought the pad was a very thick paper napkin shaped like a peanut was used to wipe off dirty hands after eating just like other paper napkins. I thought tampon was sort of weird thick Pixy Stix candy named Tampax cuz it makes sense... Pixy Stix almost rhymes with Tampax and both of them were a stick.

What's worse... I saved this unopened tampon in my jacket until I was hungry at the store. I opened and tried to eat it but I found out it's a weird cotton stucked in a cardboard toilet roll. My mom grabbed it and threw in garbage quickly and doesnt say anything!! Years later I realized what they were!!!

I used to believe…

One night after watching the Cosby Show, one of Rudy's friends explained to her that crossing your eyes would stop your period! Being the dumbass that I am- I believed it! So I sat for two hours on my bed, with my eyes crossed, and realized it wasn't working. My vision was blurry for the next 25mins.

I used to believe…

When I was younger and my mother was on her period, I would always see her using pads [which I thought were adult diapers] and I never thought it was fair for her to be allowed to pee her pants, when I always had to use the potty.

I used to believe…

When I was a little girl, I used to believe that kissing was what created babies and that every time a male kissed a female, the female would become pregnant. After watching people kissing so much on TV, I remember mentioning, "I wonder why actresses would be willing to have a baby just for the sake of kissing in a show or for their job."

I used to believe…

When I was younger, a girl in my class said that a virgin was a make-believe character, as in Santa Clause, the Easter Bunny, the Tooth Fairy, etc. I believed her for a while.

I thought that when you bled at all, that was your period. So when I got a paper cut on a Saturday (I must have been about 4, now I am 16, while my only brother David had to be 10, now 22) I saw the trickle of blood and yelled "I HAD MY PERIOD!" Of course, my whole family came running. Among them was David. I also thought as soon as you menustrated you immediately had sex. So, I yelled " Now David and I gotta have sex!" And he yelped as I yanked his arm. My mom explained it all to me that night. I was amazed.