sex

I used to believe…

When I was about 2 years old I woke up one morning in my parents bed and promptly showed my mother my penis then asked to see hers. Apparently I was quite surprised once I found out the truth.

For all I knew I was going to grow boobs someday.

I thought perhaps I my penis had an eye of it's own so that it could tell when it was looking at the loo.

I used to believe…

When my mum gave me the sex talk, she talked about how lots of people had sex just for fun, and not to make babies. I remember her using the word condoms, and thinking that this was an abbreviation for condominiums. I believed for years that as long as you had intercourse in a condominium, you wouldn't get pregnant, and that only people that lived in houses had babies. I didn't actually know anyone that lived in a "condom" so there was little to disprove my theory, until I got a better sex education.

I used to believe that when women had periods, they actually shot periods (i.e. full stops) out of their... erm... places.

I used to believe…

When I was a kid I felt terribly jipped! For the longest time I was convinced that black women produced chocolate milk and white women produced regular milk. Being white, I was upset to find out that I had missed on on the chocolately goodness of chocolate breast milk as a baby!

I used to believe…

When I first started my period at age thirteen, I was totally freaked out. I especially hated the way I could feel the blood running (ewww!), and I believed that if I was humming to myself I would trigger the blood so that it would run more. I figured humming would make my pituitary gland vibrate, and that would cause the blood to flow. I stopped humming while on my period for about a year...

I used to believe…

My biology teacher in junior high was teaching us about the female reproductive system, and found it the right time to mention the hymen. He told us that there was a small hole for period blood and PEE to get through! U'd think that a fifty-something teacher would know there're two holes...

I used to believe…

After my mom's finger was injured, she had to wear these finger bandages that looked like they were made of rubber that you just slip on. (I'm not sure what they were called.) I saw them, and I thought it was something entirely different. When I saw my mom slip it on her finger, I said aloud: "Is that a condom?" With a shocked expression. She got a good laugh out of that.

I used to believe that if you wanted a baby that you went to the doctor and he gave you a pill and that somehow the pill would grow inside your belly to be a baby.

I used to believe…

when i was about 8 i thought being lesbeian ment getting married....lol.

I used to believe…

When I was 6, i thought that everyone had a penis (I'm a boy). One time, one of my classmates, who is a girl, came over to my house. I used to like walking around naked, so i took my clothes off, and she just stared at my penis and laughed. I didn't know why it was so funny, but everone in my class found out that she saw my penis and they all laughed too. I was so confused!

i found condoms in the bathroom when i was 5 and it was right before my b-day party. I decided i'd open one and i did and i thot they were balloons! so i brought them to my mom cuz the hole was to big for me! she still laughs at that

I used to believe…

This was my mothers belief. She once told me that when she was a young child, she thought that women with large breast were pregnant, and the nipple was the door where they would squeeze out.

I used to believe…

My grandma thought that if she made cute names for everything us kids wouldn't know what she was talking about. To this day I sometimes accidently call a penis a "futzer" and a vagina a "pocket book".

I used to think that "foreskin" was the skin on your forehead. When I was 10, while bathing my 5-year-old sister, I told her to make sure she washed her foreskin really well. I will never live that one down.

I used to believe…

once when I was little I saw a woman who had a hump on her back. I don't know why I came to this conclusion, but I thought that she was pregnant and the baby would come out of her butt and the baby was living in her back.