sex

I was in a restaurant on my birthday with my husband and two samall boy, it was my birthday, a few days before christmas. There was loud music playing and the place was full. My 6 yr old son wanted the toilet, so my husband took him. When he came out we were eating and he was trying to tell me something, i couldnt hear because the music was very loud, all i could hear was something about dad buying chewing gum. When the music stopped i asked him to repeat it.... he shouted..." I didnt think dad liked chewing gum...but hes just bought some from the machine in the toilets!"...the whole place heard him, needless to say i was on the floor laughing...as were everyone else!.. kids!

I used to believe…

My mum had a friend who was brought up on a farm, ans she led quite a sheltered life.She believed that if you "courted" a boy for 9 months you would automatically become pregant. Subsequently she finished with all her boyfriends after 8 and a half months...she still single now at the age of 66!

I have two:

When I was around 4 I thought that when people had sex they just kinda rubbed together a lot, until my sister told me otherwise. I repeatedly told her for around 2 years that I was never going to have sex THAT way, I would do it the "proper" way.

Also, I used to think that you could only get pregnant if you had sex during your period.

I used to believe…

One time I found my mom's pads, and looked at her, and said, "Why do you have diapers?" she told me, "They're not diapers. They keep all the bad things from getting in your underwear."

Astonished at these protection devices, I wondered why police didn't wear them. My little sister started sticking some all over the walls one day, and I snatched them from her, yelling, "Are you stupid?! Do you want the bad stuff to stay in our house?! Take them off right now and put them around you, or else some bad people are going to come into your underwear!"... Unfortunately, some guests were over, and I ran into the living room, grabbing my sister's arm, and pointed at one of my dad's friends, who I thought was a bad guy. "See! If you don't put these around you, not the wall, then that guy will go into your underwear!"

I then glared at the man, and pointed my finger, yelling, "You stay away! We got pads and you're not going to get into our underwear!"... Boy, was my mom upset with me.

i used to think that the man would place his penis between the boobs and the lady would somehow get pregnant...

I used to think that pads were diapers for women who didn't have time to go to the bathroom.

Also, I thought you used a tampon for if you were swimming and you had to pee. Then I was confused because I thought the tampon would swell up and get stuck inside of you.

i used to believe that babies grew in the ground and that they were hatched from potapoes

I thought pads were for peeing and me and my friend kept drinking sprts drinks until we could pee ehind a chair with a towel under us just in case. I did this for aout a week. I thought it was fun!

i used to think that tampons were small tube type things and when you put them in all the blood would drip in there and when you took it out you poured the blood out and put it back in. i know know that it is incorrect!

I used to believe…

When I was little and went to the store with my mom she always bought those maxi - pads after getting me some candy to keep me quiet. I thought the maxi - pads were candy, too, and that she was trying to hide them from me. I used to go home and yell at her for not sharing her candy.

I used to believe…

when i was 10 years old i believed that women who had twin babies had slept with 2 men

I used to believe…

before i was informed about periods i once went up to my mum and asked her why she sometimes wore nappies! i had no idea they were sanatary towles

I used to believe…

not strictly my own, but my nan told my mum that before she could get pregnant, the man had to bite her nipple off, i think she held this belief for years!

I used to think that sex was painful because of all the moaning.

I used to think there were two separate entrances to the vagina, a front one for "missionary" congress and a back one for a "rear entry". Despite some perfectly good sex education and being no stranger to the occasional soft-porn mag, I held this belief right up to the age of 15, when my best friend rang me up to explain the true situation having just reached a "breakthrough" with his long-term girlfriend that afternoon. Then again, he appeared to have been labouring under a similar misapprehension himself: "It's not at the front," he said excitedly. "It's underneath!"

I used to believe…

When I was small I used to believe that the man impregnated the woman by peeing into her vagina.