sex: giving birth

I used to believe that when it was time for a woman to give birth , she would swallow a rope , the baby would take hold,and the mother would then pull the baby out of her mouth .

My Mum told me that baby's came out "between your legs". I had this vision of half the baby coming out of the right leg and the other half out of the left leg. I couldn't quite figure out how that happened. Then a friend's Mum told me baby's came out of your bum and I was so annoyed at my Mum for lying to me!!

I used to believe that the reason you had to stay in your bed when you were near giving birth was that if you went to the bathroom the baby would fall out of your butt into the toilet and would have to be fished out.

I used to think that women gave birth to little girls and men gave birth to baby boys. My sister thought the same thing, but our parents never told us this. We think it's because we had these Barbie doll type dolls where the dads came with boys and the moms came with girls!

I thought that babies would just rip out of the mothers stomach. i was horrified of pregnancy for awhile and i wondred why only some women got surgery for pregnancy.

I used to believe that ALL babies had to be cut out of their mommies tummies (like a C-section), and was terrified to have children because I didn't want to have my tummy cut open.

when i was a kid i used to think 'labour day' was a day that every mother gave birth on. then i got confused as to how people had different birthdays. so i decided that 'labour day' was a day to celebrate child birth. it wasn't til i was about 8 before i realised what labour day actually was.

Seems that many people had my same belief, but it used to really fill me with fear. I too believed that mothers pooped their babies out, but they did so while sitting on the toilet. I always used to worry about the babies drowning in the water and wondered how the mothers were fast enough to clean themselves and also save their babies.

when I was little and asked my Mom how the baby got out of a lady's tummy, she told me that ladies have a "special hole" for the baby to come out of. I thought that the " special hole" was your belly button!

A few years later, my little sister saw my Dad's belly button and thought that he was pregnant!-she must have used the same logic!

When I was little every movie and t.v. show I watched in which a woman gave birth, they always showed the process happening really fast. The woman's water breaks and BAM, 5 minutes later a baby. So not knowing any better, I really though that labor only lasted about 5 to 10 minutes. So whenever I would see a pregnant woman, I would always hope she'd go into labor right there so I could get to watch and see the baby. Never happened though. But it wasn't until I was about 13 that I learned labor in fact is usually MUCH longer than 5 minutes!

I used to believe that blue babies were babies who held their bereath too long. My best friend told me she and her dad were born blue, her sister was purple and her mom was green. I looked at baby pics of myself and told her I was pink.

I used to believe that when someone was giving birth, the baby came out of the belly button. I was wondering how the baby got through a small belly button.

I once asked my Mom where babies came from and since she wasn't ready to explain female anatomy to me yet, she told me they came out of the woman's butt. I'm still scarred by that idea to this day.

My eldest child was born when I was 19 and very niave. Just before my due date one of the nurses at the OB office told me that after birth most women experience bleeding similar to that of a menstrual cycle and she recommended that I make sure I was prepared with the appropriate supplies at home. After that visit I stopped by the market for TAMPONS! A few days later it seemed pretty obvious tht wasn't what she meant.

This is how I pictured birth in my mind as a child: The expectant mother would go up on a stage in front of a large audience. A big red curtain would open so that the audience would see the expectant mother naked and squatting over a five gallon bucket. She would push the child out into the bucket and the audience would applaude.

This is not my belief, but my step-cousin's:

When my step-mother was pregnant with my half-sister Alice, my step-cousin was fascinated by the whole affair, and couldn't wait for Alice to come out so she could play with her. Evetually it was explained to my step-cousin that Alice mightn't be able to do all the exciting things she wanted to do with her at first - that, in fact, when she was born, Alice wouldn't even be able to walk.

"That's alright," declared my step-cousin, without much concern. "If she doesn't have any legs, I'll carry her!"