sex: oral sex

When I was around 5 I heard the term "blow job". I quickly asked my father what that was. He responded "It's when a woman blow dries her hair"
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A year or so later, we're getting ready to leave for mass. Dad asks me what was keeping mom. My response was "she's in the bathroom giving a blow job". He then asked me where I learned that phrase from lol

When I was in 6th grade, i leaned over and whispered something in my buddy's ear. Well, the other kid, sitting across from us at the table said, "oh my gosh! you just gave him a blow job!" it took a while of explaining to convince him otherwise...

When I was about 12, around the camp fire at Scout Camp, the conversation moved onto Sex. I decided to keep very quiet in case I said something deadly embarrasing, but one of the more cocky scouts in my troop suddenly declared that he had had oral sex. No-one believed him.

When one of the leaders asked him what oral sex was he eventually replied that "it was when you had sex without an erection"!

He was never allowed to forget that one.

I used to believe that a "blow job" meant that the man lay down on a table naked, and the woman literally "blew" on his penis until who knows what happened.

I also believed that "getting laid" had something to do with a very clean table with a white sheet over it. The man and woman would both take off their clothes and lie down side by side on this flat, clean table. I dared not think past that point.

I was not a little child when I believed these things. I was about 12 and learned these terms from the wild Irish girl who used to sit next to me in French class.

In 4th grade we were discussing what type of jobs we wanted to pursue. Using a term I somehow learned from my brother, but having no clue what it meant, I remarked to my friend that I wanted a blowjob. The teacher overheard and wasn't so happy. I got a nice lecture in the hall.

When I was a wee one in grade school, I thought a blow job was when someone would blow into another person's ear. So did all of my friends. So one night when my parents were going to take us to the movies and let us sit with our friends so we could be "cool" and not have parents with us while they went to a grownup movie, my mom told us "Now, I don't want you to sit in the back!" I said "Yah! Cause that's where everybody is giving eachother blowjobs!"

The look on her face was truly memorable. She asked us what we thought a blow job was. When we told her, she said that wasn't it. When we asked her what it WAS then, she said we'd have to ask our dad.

The look on HIS face when we swarmed him as he got home from work yelling "Dad! Dad! What's a blowjob? Mom said you'd tell us!" was even better.

But bless the man, he managed to explain it to us without blushing too much, including the follow up questions. We all agreed that it was pretty dang gross!

I was a rather naive child who didn't know much about sex. I remember finally 'figuring out' what a blowjob was around the time of the Clinton scandal (I must have been in 6th grade or so) but I got my details a bit mixed up and decided a blowjob was when you stuck a cigar in a woman's vagina and smoked it. My friends were very impressed by my new knowledge!

I used to think that a blowjob was when you blow on a woman's nipples to inflate their breasts and make them bigger (breast enlargement) but I never told anyone...until now!

When I was about 10 or so, my aunt and uncle owned an emergency tire service company for 18 wheelers. There were two phones in the house, one for business and one for work, which none of the kids in the house answered. Well one day the house phone rang and some guy asked how much a blow job cost. Thinking he had the wrong phone number but needing some help with his tires I ran into the dining room where all the workers and family were having lunch and blurted out how much a blow job was, imagine 10 adult faces turning red at the same time....for years I thought blow jobs always meant something to do with tires.

Until I was about 12 I thought that a "blow job" was when a woman blew a raspberry on a man's penis. You know, a raspberry where you put you mouth on someone and make a weird farting noise.

I also thought "getting laid" meant that two people layed next to each other on a bed.

...So that's why people looked at me weird when I said I'd been laid...

When I was about 7 or so a friend of mine came to school and proudly proclaimed he had given himself a blowjob. I wasn't really aware of what a blowjob was so I asked how he did it hoping he would explain the meaning of the word. He told me that he had taken his mom's hairdryer and used it on his penis, thus giving himself a blowjob. For quite a while after that I was under the assumption that a blowjob was having someone, or something, blowing on your penis.

When I was little I heard my brother talking about a blow job. I didn't know what it was and I didn't want to ask him, but I knew it had something to do with a man. So for the longest time I thought that it was when you put your butts up against each other and fart on each other. Wow I was so wrong, but its still funny.

My little sister (who is 13) came up to me the other day and said, "I used to think a blowjob was when a girl shaved a guys "thing" I felt bad for laughing, but I just couldn't see how she could have come up with that!!

I came from a very strict and prudish family. My parents still lived with my grandparents and for the first 10 years of my life we were a big, happy family. However, because of my grandparents presence, my parents never had THE TALK. Dammit... Anyway, one day (when I was about 17) I was permitted to go round to a friends house one day- a boy I'd known since I was 7. Of course, they didn't think anything could happen- they'd known him for so long they were sure he didnt know anything about sex either. But he didnt live with his grandparents and he knew ALL about it. Anyway, we were in his room listenin 2 music when he said 'dya wanna play dares?' So we did the usual stuff, shout tings out the window, empty the shampoo bottle on ur parents bed... when he said 'i dare you to give me a blowjob' so i agreed and went out the room. HE off course got 'it' out and er.... ready. MEanwhile I thought he wanted me to give him a cut and blowdry! I got scissors and hairdryers etc and was shocked 2 see his thing when i returned. He fainted when he saw the scissors adn I had to call and amulance. In the end it was the driver who gave me the talk. Needless to say I wasn't allowed to see the guy anymore...

When i was pretty little, I remember hearing my brother talking to his friend. He was excited, because he was going on a date with his girlfriend, and was sure she was going to give him head. when he came back later, he seemed pretty discouraged, and called his friend. i listened on the phone, and found out that the date had not gone where he wanted it to go.
so, being the nice sister i was, i decided I was going to give my brother head!
i pulled the head off my barbie doll, and gave it to him...

When I was little, Vh1 had a greatest hits or something countdown. The BeeGees were like no. 5, so my babysitter, who used to love them was really happy. Now, somewhere along the way I got the BeeGees confused with BJ. and a few weeks ago I had just learned that BJ meant Blow Job. So, to impress Jakkie, my babysitter, I yelled out "Look Jakkie, its the blow jobs!!!"

I knew "oral" had to do with your mouth, so it made sense to my 6 six year old self that "oral sex" meant kissing.

Well, one day my father and I were watching some TV special showing a man singing with the microphone right up to his lips, and i, of course, had to show off by proclaiming, "look daddy that man is giving the microphone oral sex!"

How proud he must have been of the public school system that day...