rude bits
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top belief!
when i was about 3, i remember playing in my grans wading pool naked. she told me if i played with my penis it would fall off... this was apparently the reason why mum didnt have a penis.
i reminded her about this conversation recently and she denied having said it.
top belief!
I used to believe that boys and girls had the same parts under their clothes...until I saw my brother come out of the shower. I was confused for months.
top belief!
My sister didn't understand penises and vaginas when she was little. When she saw my dad coming out of the shower without any clothes on she yelled "Dad, you're pooping!!!"
When I was about 7 or 8 years old, my next-door neighbor (about 13 at the time) tried to explain sex to me. Unfortunately, he gave me a very poorly worded description of a hymen by saying, "when a girl first has sex, a bone in her vagina breaks, and it hurts really bad." Of course, my inexperienced mind immediately assumed there was a cage of bones, like a ribcage, inside every woman's vagina. I had trouble understanding this anyway, so when I learned the truth several years later, it was a relief :) .
top belief!
When I was 3, I used to think that "dawdling" was touching your private area. So my mom would say "Stop dawdling! We gotta go! " I would get upset and say "I'm not touching my wee wee!"
top belief!
I used to believe that womens breasts was actually called apples.
top belief!
When I was little, I thought my mom didn't have a vagina, like me, I thought that she had a patch of hair instead of a vagina.
I used to think the umbilical cord was connected to the genitals of newly born babies, and that when the cord was cut the midwife had to be very careful-if the baby was a boy she might accidentally cut his penis off, and if the baby was a girl she might not cut enough off and there would be all this excess cord just dangling.
top belief!
When my son was entering puberty, he realized a testicle had descended while he was taking a bath. He then proceeded to run out, screaming and covered in bubbles, "Dad! We need to go to the hospital, NOW! I have a tumor!" He then explained his discovery to me. "Oh no," I replied. "Get dressed and get in the car! Hurry!" I then took him to the hospital, but only to have the doctor explain it to him. Hey, I didn't want to do it!
When I was growing up I thought everyone had a vagina, till I saw My Dad in the shower one day and I was shocked and went and asked My Mom right away, what it was and She had to explain the difference
I used to think that circumsicion is when they cut a girls penis off when she was born. I pictured it like "It's a girl! Now we have to cut her penis off, 'cuz that's just how we do things". I remember wondering why they had to do that, because it must have hurt to get it sliced off!
top belief!
I used to think when babies were born that the parents would decide whether to make it a girl or a boy by chopping the umbilical cord to size. That is, if they wanted a girl they would cut the umbilical cord short (leaving only the clitoris -- which I thought was a tiny penis), and if they wanted a boy they would leave the umbilical cord as long as they wanted to make the penis.
When I was little, my mom told me that the place I pee out of was my "bottom".
As you might imagine, I got really confused later in life when I heard the word "bottom" used in other ways.
I remember once I was watching a movie, and a mom was talking to her son, and she said something like, "Tommy, if you don't do your homework I'm going to spank your bottom with a belt!"
Not only did I think that was completely AWFUL, I was like, "Boys can have bottoms, too?!"
So for a while I thought boys could have vaginas, and girl's could have penises, and it was only having boobs that determined your sex.
top belief!
i used to think that a man's private part was called a 'lemon' and a lady's private parts were called a 'melon' and to this day i still don't know why!
top belief!
I used to believe men had to squeeze their penus to wee. I believed that when they needed the loo, they had to go or there bladders would explode! Otherwise how do you explain their need for the loo if they didn't wet themselves?
My dad explained to me at the age of 10 because of an innocent comment. But I think he had something to do with this belief...
top belief!
Up until I was about 14, I always thought that the penis was called a "pickle."
top belief!
When i was little my sister told me that no one had bum cracks. She said that one day God was chopping his vegtables and he dropped the knife. A man was bending down to pick something up and the knife cut him a crack. Every one loved it and decided to make there own. I thought this for years and i asked her how we had them as no one had cut our bums and she just laughed. She had me going for years.
top belief!
When I was little I used to believe that I was born a male and that one day I was running around naked and a goose came and bit my genitals off, making me a female.
top belief!
I was a very sheltered child (as well as a late bloomer), and even though I had had a "growing and changing" class in fifth grade, I was somewhat clueless about my own body. So when my breasts started to form in middle school, it just happened to coincide with the health class discussions about breast cancer. I was mortified! I remember sitting in the back of the class and feeling like my world was ending. I thought I had breast cancer, even though I was only 12, because the description they gave was "lumps in the breasts." I did not realize, until a few months later when I finall broke down in tears and told my mother that I had breast cancer, that a woman's breasts are SUPPOSED to have tissue growing in them, because that's how they form... I had always thought that they just kind of expanded, like they were filled with air.
top belief!
I used to believe that 'Shagging' meant flopping around, after reading a book about a shaggy dog with floppy hair.
I was about 7 years old and i was watching a tv show called 'top of the pops' with my sister and the babysitter who was looking after us.
The man who was singing on it was wearing tight leather trousers and was dancing in a way that made his willy 'flop around'.
So i exclaimed "hey look his willy's shagging!"
my sister who is much older than me burst into fits of laughter along with the babysitter.
I sat there laughing with them because i thought they found it funny that his willy was 'flopping around' too.
later on that evening they told me what 'shagging' really meant.
:D
oops!
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