rude bitsShow most recent or highest rated first.
I was probably about 6 or 7. I had a small rash a little below my belly button (the button on my pants was nickel, which i was allergic to). When I saw this, I ran into my mom's room yelling "MOM! I'M GROWING A PENIS!" I was quite distressed, for I liked being a girl.
I was on the phone (I was about 5.He was just a boy from my class who I liked and presumed my boyfriend) to my boyfriend and I asked if he had a penis.When he said yes,I was shocked.My mum had told me that only my dad had a penis and that boys only grew them at the age of 20.She only said it to stop me from having sex 'till I was 20,at least,and seeing that the boy I liked was only 5 like me,I was generally shocked.
In the fourth grade I was learning about human growth and development and my teacher told us that girls grow boobs when they hit puberty. For the longest time I thought tthat they grew over night and that one day I would wake up with big boobs and everyone would know I hit puberty.
when I was in preschool, I thought that when your nipples got hard, you were growing up. I didn't want to grow up so I would always push them inwards.....I'm an idiot
When i was about 3(i am a girl) i saw a boys penis and kindy although i didnt know what it was. I went to my mom and asked her if this "girl" had some sort of disease and mom said no, he doesnt have a disease that is his personal "lump" until the 8th grade i thought a boys penis was called a lump. During sex ed. class i was put right and felt embarassed when the teacher said, " and this is the male reporductive organ, the penis." after his sentence i blurted out, " Wat the hell is a penis? Isnt it called a lump?!?!
when iwas little i thought that in the cave people days when woman didnt wear bras so i thought that when woman got really really old there boobs would drag on the ground (ouch)
when i was younger i used to believe that the small thing on the front of a womans body was a small penis and so i called it a 'dinky'. My brothers used to get me to say it to all their friends and im now going out with ine of them! i'll never live it down
when my friend was little he had a friend he played with a lot who was black. one time when his friend spent the night, his mom had them take a bath together. he said that he was really shocked that his friend's penis was the same color as the rest of him. for some reason he assumed that his friend's penis would be white just like his own penis.
once i was looking after a little girl(about 4 or 5 yrs old) and she said 2 me (pointing 2 my breasts) what are those?
what is what? i replied trying not to laugh,
those big squishy things under your t-shirt?
there special things girls get when they grow up, i said.
i dont believe you! she said,and ran to tell her mum i was being naughty by putting cushions up my t-shirt!! i couldnt stop laughing and neither could her mother!
when i was younger (about 4 i guess) i saw my dad naked and didnt realise men had balls so i said to him " it looks like you have 6"
Imagine the look on my grandmother's face when I, her four-year-old granddaughter, asked "when do we get to chose whether we're mommies or daddies (women or men)? I thought peeing while standing was just SO cool, and I had already figured out that only the men get to stand, so, logically, the only barrier in my way was becoming a man. I wasn't looking forward to the whole shaving thing, and I really liked my long ponytail and my barbies, but I figured those were sacrifices I'd have to make.
My grandma was quite diplomatic but I was soooo crushed when she explained that my hose attachment option had expired at the factory. I think that's why we got those Childcraft encyclopedias so soon afterwards.
I used to think that pubic hair was called public hair. in Sex Ed class at school I even "corrected" the teacher!!!!!!!!
I used to think that when you had sex you would grow a dick (bearing in mind that everyone in my family was female)and men had dicks cos they'd had sex.
When I was about 13 (I'm just about 14), I used to believe that EVERYTIME I'd masterbate, God would kill a kitten. Or when you even touched your " you know what" you'd die and go straight to hell, because when I was 6 I touched down there and my step-mom said not to, 'cause its a sin. What I found confusing is that EVERY BODY has to touch their genitals. They MUST wipe when they go # 1 or 2.
When I was about 3 or 4 I used my mom's diaphragm as a water cup after brushing my teeth, I thought I was so grown up swishing water and gargling. I didn't realize where it had been. . . Imagine my horror when she told me.
I used to believe that giving a "blow job" literally meant that you put your mouth down and blew air on the other person! Embarassing!
I used to think that the word Ass was slang for a boys penis. One day I was riding my bike and a bunch of teenagers said "nice ass" I told them I didn't have one because I was a girl. They laughed at me, and I went home crying, now knowing what an ass hole really was...
While shopping at a department store recently, my wife and I passed through the lingerie section. Noticing their display of training bras, my wife commented on how silly they are. I proceeded to explain to her how training bras are necessary to train the breasts to do their thing. Without the necessary training, they might grow up to be misshapened. My wife, splitting a gut, explained to 30-something me that breasts do their thing quite naturally. A training bra trains the girl (to wear a bra); it does not train the breasts!
I used to think that when I guys got a erection or a boner the penis would actuclly get so big that the large bone inside would just pop right out and they would have to go 2 da bathroom to push it back in! i was only like 7 gimmie a break lol...
I used to believe that penises had a bone in them ... Yikes! I don't know why tho', just assumed it, 'til I was like in 5th grade! I'm 29 years old, the word "Boner" was pretty popular back then ...