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After discovering masturbation very early on, I found a blue, plush pillow that I would rub against my penis. I assumed that the pillow was full of drugs that made me feel good, that I was breaking the law, and that my penis would turn into a vagina if I didn't stop masturbating.
I had overheard a kid in school talking about naming his cat Boner and I had no idea that the word had anything to do with the male anatomy. I had assumed he named his cat after some famous motorcycle rider or wrestler and because I liked this kid I decided imitate him and name my new pet frog Boner. My mom gave me the weirdest look when I told it's name and I didn't find out why until 3 years later. It doesn't help that I had written Boner on the back of all of photos I have of my frogs.
I didn't know the difference between a penis and testicles, but I'd heard of "balls," so I thought penises looked basically like a bunch of meatballs stuck together in a row. When I was eight, this came up in conversation with a male friend - I drew a picture for him and he laughed hysterically and then drew me an accurate picture.
I'm not sure where I picked it up, but I used to believe that the word "ejaculation" was just another term for a coughing/sneezing fit, or shivering.
So one day in grade three I burst out hacking and the young female teachers goes "Liam, are you okay?"
and I said "Don't worry, I'm just ejaculating."
Another time it was extremely cold in my room so I went downstairs and said, "Mom, could you turn the heat on? It's so cold in my room that I started ejaculating."
When I was very little I would occasionally shower with my mum. I figured out quickly that she didn't have a penis, but couldn't quite figure out what was in its place. Her labia didn't close the whole way, however, and I was absolutely convinced that what I was seeing between them was her poop as it made its way to her bottom.
When I was young when I daydreamed about kissing boys my clitoris would pulse.
I always thought that clenching my teeth together would solve the problem.
Up until I was about 13 years old, whenever I heard the phrase "busting a nut", as in ejaculating, I thought that the man literally squeezed his testicle until it burst open.
So I didnt understand how a man could do it more than twice in his life, considering he only has two testicles.
I didnt even comprehend the pain this scenario would cause.
Well, about two years ago, i touched my clitoris, but i didnt know what it was at the time. I started freaking out because i thought it was cancer haha. i finally looked online and figured it out.
When I was in year 5, one of the girls in my class convinced us all that masturbation was when you squeezed your boobs and milk came out.
i was in some public toilets and my sister was in the one next to me with my mum (she was only 2). she then shouted at the top of her voice "Mummy there's a squirell on your bottom"! i couldn't stop laughing.
In the fourth grade, my girl friend and I (I'm also a girl) had an argument over which hole the baby came out of.
At the time neither of had a very good understanding of our own anatomy.
I didn't know I had a vagina because I couldn't see it, I thought you peed out of your clit, I knew it wasn't called a penis, so I just called it my pee thing. So I figured the baby came out your butt hole since one can't fit out a tiny little pee hole.
My friend was aware she had a vagina, and she referred to it as a "pee hole" since neither of us were even aware of the word "vagina". So she said that the baby came out your pee hole (she was talking about a vagina, but I thought she was talking about a clit)
So we argued about it for the longest time until I learned I had a vagina thanks to a book about "girls growing up"
but I still thought you pee'd from your clit.
It wasn't until much later that we realized there is actually a little hole between the clit and the vagina where the pee comes from. Turns out we were both wrong about something.
I'm a girl, and when I was little, I used to think that I would one day grow a penis. I figured this because once I saw my dad naked, and knew that guys have penises, and not too much later I saw my grandmother naked. Both of them were awfully hairy between their legs, and I knew it wasn't right to look at naked people so I didn't get a good look, I just figured she had a penis too. So i just figured that since they both looked a lot alike, and that a full grown man has a penis, that my clit would get bigger and turn into a penis one day. I couldn't wait to be a grown up and have a penis.
In varsity I went out with a guy who thought a hymen was an animal, that as related to a Hyena. I magine that!
When I was growing I thought that when boys were born the doctors cut the cord from the penis. I really could never figure out were girls came from. I was just glad my doctor liked my parents.
When i was about 5 or 6 i didn't know what boobs were so i had a friend who was really fat and she had big ones because of her fat and she said to me when i'm 7 i'll have hanging boobs and then i went home and said "hey mom i can't wait until i'm 7 because i'm gonna get hanging boobs" and she just laughed
My aunt convinced me at a young age that the skin on the outside of my vagina was called my "chicken", since it looked like a rooster's waddle.
I used to think that after a girl is born, the doctor cuts her between the legs to find the opening of the vagina. (I am female).
I used to think that boys grew multiple penises as they aged.
Ex.--a little boy would have one, a thirty yo would have three or four...
I read a lot of FanFictions (stories about shows that people just borrow the characters from) and for years I wasn't really up on the sexual slang. And of course, because I was curoius like all preteens and earily teenagers are, I read some light smut. And I had no idea that masturbating was called anything but that: 'masturbating'.
So when two male characters would talk about 'jacking off' or even *more* confusing to me the British 'wanking off' I just assumed it was some strange thing that was unique to those characters.
It tooke me a couple of months and some reading of more hardcore stories until I fiugered it out.
Same thing goes with a blowjob.
Also, on a side note, I thought "being in the closet" just meant you were shy.
Imagine how imbarssed I was when I told my mom one of my best friends was in the closet, and she said: "Jared's gay?"
I was mortified. I'm so glad now at 17 I know more than I did.
Not me but a boyfriend.. we were about 19 at the time so it's still a little amazing, but something he said offhand make me dig deeper and I found that he thought women's nipples were actually solid.. no holes.. and when it was time to breastfeed, the woman had to sterilize a needle and puncture a hole before any milk could come out. Just the once, but still.