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sex: rude bits

1,308 beliefs

the best of rude bits

I thought making out meant trying to see something (because of how people say "I can't quite make that out" or whatever)

— Bootlebat

I used to believe that the female body part was called "the gina" as opposed to "vagina."


— "E"

I used to belive that my willy was a snake and if i wasnt careful it would bite

— eggbert

Despite masturbating frequently during my teenage years, when the word 'erection' was first mentioned in sex ed class, I thought the word realted to construction work. I had no idea it had two meanings!

Anon

i got told if you rub your sperm on
your spots they'll go...

p.s i still try it but it never works

— anom

When I was eight, some friends and I had convinced some girls that male genitalia were detachable, and that boys were required to keep their penii in their lockers throughout the school day. The girls were fascinated, and demanded to see them. We pleaded modesty and declined.

— Buckler

I'm not sure how old I was, maybe 7 or 8. This is before I knew what sex was or what a guy's "tool" was for. Well, while in the shower, sometimes the water would hit me just right and I would get hard. I thought this meant it was time to get out of the shower and that "the hard stick" was a towel rack. And I would hang my towel on it!! LoL

— Hang your towel on my rack!

pick of the bunch

When I was younger being naive and geographically inept I assumed that every time someone refered to the "Nether Regions" I thougt they were on about Holland!

— Blodwyn the Gerbil

pick of the bunch

My uncle used to tell me that if I blew really hard through my thumb every day, my boobs will grow. It never worked!

Anon

When in primary 5 the class discussion moved onto piercings. one of my friends said he had seen this woman on tv who had her nipples pierced. Upon hearing this one of the other guys in the class said but wouldnt all the air come out? yes he got laughed at fo that for ages

— kenny

I also thought that the function of testicles was test your pee. (Test for what, I don't know. Diseases? Impurities?).

After all, they are called TESTicles.

— Kdees

pick of the bunch

I used to think that the proper term for anus was "poonis". After all, you pee with your penis, so you must poo with your "poonis". Logical, eh?

— Kdees

I thought my testicles were pickled onions I had swallowed wrongly.

— jon

When I was young I misread the word pubic, thinking it said public. I could never understand why something you kept hidden was called public hair!!!!

Anon

I used to believe that the scrotum were the place the urine was collected so when I was really in the need for a piss, I used to massage it to make it go away.

It wasn't until I was about 9-10 when I realized that the amount of urine i peed was too much to fit inside the scrotum and that I had to rethink it all.

Anon

I used to believe that a man had to go to hospital for an injection in order to get an erection. I said this to my mum when I was about 11... I don't think she has ever laughed as much!

Anon

pick of the bunch

I thought that boys' bikes had cross bars on them so they could lay their willies on it as they cycled.

— Anne, Edinburgh

When I was about 11 I decided that I didn't want to get a girl pregnent. So I told everyone I was getting a visectomy. At that time I thought that meant that you got your testicles removed.

— David M.

I used to think I could decide which sex I wanted to be when I grew up. I figured if the body can grow breasts, why not penises? Imagine my surprise when I found that the decision had already been made.

— Trixie

When I was about 3 y.o. I used to think that cameras had x-ray vision and would therefore expose me to the world, therefore I went through a period of grabbing my crotch during photos (Wacko Jacko eat your heart out!)

— Nathan B

Until I was 20, I honestly believed that a boys testicles dropped suddenly when they reached puberty! Just like dropped in their pants one day - must have been disturbing to have that happen to you in the playground huh?

— NJM

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