sex

I was quite a knowing teen, and one day, When my Dad had comehome from work, and was reading the paper, I asked him 'in all innocence'

"Daddy, what's a nymphomaniac? I've heard the word on the TV. What does it mean?"

My Dad went red, rustled the paper and looked really embarassed and said:

"It's Joan Collins, now shut up!"

Bless!

Sarzi

When I was about 9 I thought lesbians were just beple from a country called Lesbia. I was playing The sims and and I made a family... they were all girls cuz i was a girl... I called them the lesbians... later my older brother was playing and asked if I made it. I said Yes... He had to explain to me what lesbians Really Ment. I was sooooo embarassed!!! lol

Lesbia

My sister was told that "making love" meant baking heart-shaped cookies in your underwear. She believed it until she was 12!

Boomer

i used to think a sex crime was when you didn't do sex correctly! lolss!

oh so innocent!

My dad used to tell my sisters and I that before a boy could kiss us, he had to kiss my dad--the same way he wanted to kiss us!!
It worked for a while...

Anon

I believed that oral contraception meant talking your way out of it x]

Stupid

In my family sex isn't really a talked about subject, so when I was younger (almost in high school) I thought sex was just a dirty thing perverted people did and had nothing to do with getting pregnant. I remember thinking I'd be so embarassed if I ever found out anyone in my family had ever had sex. By the way, my mum has seven children.

Sim

When I was little my mom told me that a prostitute was a woman who sold her body parts. I imagined her auctioning off an extra kidney or some tonsils.

Jen

When I was 15 years old, my buddy and I told our girl friend that black people had black semen.. she believed it and asked a teacher in the middle of the class, the teacher said "No, they all have the same sperm colour.. believe me I know", that last part slipped and the teacher was blushing a lot and another girl asked if it was true that afrian-american people have longer members.. the teacher left the class in shame

Casey

Up until I was about 12, I thought an 'Orgy' was when people got together and organized things.

Leah

When I was younger, I thought sex was two peolpe pressing their nipples together.

Katz

When I was in 1st or 2nd grade I sometimes watched One Life To Live with my mom when I was home from school. At the time there was a character who had raped a woman and during his trial they were talking about how he ripped her clothes off. Well, I thought that they were saying "raked", not "raped" and so I thought if you "raked" someone it meant that you took a rake and ripped all their clothes off with it. I agreed with the characters on the show that this was a horrible crime!

Anon

One day we were talking at the dinner table and somewhere in the conversation someone metioned sex. My litte sister (only 9, my brother, sister and me are 10 years older or more) tried talk along with everybody, as if she knew what sex was. So my mother asked her if she knew what it was and she replied: It's when people rub their feet together. My parents didn't understand, but I did. My sister and me had just watched some television. Here in the Netherlands we have descriptions for tv programs and movies. They use pictograms to describe what kind of things you can expect in a movie of tv show. For example if there is violence in it. And also if there is sex in it. The pictogram for sex is four feet, two facing up and two facing down between the first two. So naturallly sex is rubbing your feet together!

Anne

At around 6 years old, I heard the word "sex".... A few of us who rode the bus together, agreed that "sex" was lying naked with the opposite sex and eating fruit.

Terri

When I saw "F" under sex (i think this was on my birth certificate) I thought I had 'failed' sex. I figured this meant I was somehow bad or dirty and was rather embarrassed by it. But I felt a little better when I saw my mom's driver's liscence... turns out she failed too!

Patti

I don't know how I got it into my head, but for some reason I thought sex was equal to a peanut butter and jelly sandwich, because when you put the two things together something great happens(I don't know). Anywho, I had this crush on this girl in about 1st grade, and told her that I thought we should make a sandwich, thinking that she had jelly inside her and that my peanut butter in my penis would make something amazing. I guess I wasn't too far off in the end.

Hiphopanonymous

Not knowing what the word 'laid' meant. I told a joke to my uncle in a checkout line (other kids were laughing at it at school). Your mother is like a brick...flat on both sides and laid by mexicans. The lady behind us was floored. My uncle had a talk with me in the car later.

Anon

When I was eight, I sort of knew what "gay" meant. However, I could never figure out how two gay men could have sex. After thinking for a while, I concluded that the men would stand naked facing each other with their erect penises, and proceed to slap them together. In my mind's eye it would be a different version of a clapping game and they would sing a sort of rhyme to go along with the act.


I've been exposed to fanfiction and now know better.

a stupid girl

So I didn't really understand the difference between jacking off and jacking around until the day my junior varsity baseball coach asked me to go tell some of the guys to "quit jacking around over there." I shouted the message over to the guys at the top of my lungs but got it a little jumbled. Lots of laughs at my expense.

Anon

I used to believe both boys and girls had penises so i thought sex was when they tied them together.

Anon