the law

When I was very small (about 3 or 4 or thereabouts) I vastly overestimated the power of the police. I didn't know about laws (as a concept) that they were also required to uphold and follow as well. Anyhow, I thought they were a villainous, secretive, nasty and somewhat arbitrary gang. I "knew" that if you insulted or looked at them funny they would drag you off to JAIL (all caps to my three year-old mind) but that just not provoking them was no guarantee--JAIL was still a possibility. In addition to this, I thought that the president was far more powerful than he is, and that people who insulted him (anywhere, on any occasion, not just to his face) faced immediate and dire punishment, probably being executed on the spot. This perceived state of affairs bothered me surprisingly little, but it did irritate me a bit that a government would so grossly misuse their power. Because of this I whispered that "the president stinks" or something while I was up in a tree and there was no one in sight. Unsurprisingly I am alive and well.
P.S. I don't live in Myanmar, North Korea, or Uzbekistan (:-D)

I used to believe that there were fashion police that wandered the streets undercover, and if i wore something they didn't like they'd arrest me.
This belief started when my sister made fun of something I was wearing and told me to watch out for the fashion police, little did she know i took her seriously.

When I was little, I would hear about people smoking weed.. Well I thought that "weed" just meant any type of weed like in the yard or something so I wondered why everyone didnt get in trouble for having weeds in their yard... I was quite an idiot when I was little. hahah

When I was 4, I heard about cocaine on the news and I asked what it was... anyway, I was at the beach with my parents and they looked in the sand and said to me "look honey! look at the COQUINA" (coquina are those little shelled animals in the sand) ... well I thought they were saying COCAINE.. so I was yelling "look theres more cocaine!!" ... HAHA.. I then realized when I was a bit older that they were indeed talking about coquina.. haha it was embarassing to think that I said that back then though... xD

I used to be really paranoid about robbers breaking into our house when I was younger....

So my grand plan to thwart the criminals was to pretend to be a robber too - by dressing all in black, with a black stripy jumper, and a eye mask and a sack that had 'Swag' printed on it. Then I could go to the robbers hideout with them, and get all our stuff back.

My parents gently dissuaded me, saying that we didn't need any extra security, and it would be very dangerous for me.

Probably just as well - I would have looked more like 'Hamburglar' (remember him?!) than a robber! In fact, that's probably where I got the idea from!!

Whilst watching re-constructions of crimes on the the t.v. i could never fully grasp what sort of person would film an armed robbery, rape, murder etc rather than doing something to prevent it. I am not willing to say how long this moral dilema troubled but suffice to say i was enjoying a pint in a pub (leagally!) when i was given an explanation for their lack of morals!

When I was dating my boyfriend we went to the country so he could introduce me to his mother. She told me stories about her sister and them going to the bar and coming home stoned.

So I leaned over to my boyfriend and whispered your mom is really with it. I didn't know she does drugs. My boyfriend giggled and said No! She meant they were drunk. Well I never heard that term used before to describe drinking. It's a good thing I didn't say anything about her being a New Wave type Mom!

When i was little, i thought that a 'serial' killer was someone who would come and kill my breakfast w/ a knife.

i used to think being "prosecuted" meant getting the death penalty. i remember crying hyserically when my family and i went hiking, and there was a very old sign that said "do not trespass, violators will be prosecuted to the fullest extent of the law" i totally thought if we got caught we'd immediately get the electric chair. i thought it was an awful extreme punishment.

I remember when I was in the fifth grade and the DARE officer came in and showed us the drug case, there was a stamp in there with a picture of dancing monkies on it. When he got to the stamp, he explained people would stick it on their skin and get the drugs that way and the cute monkies might make it enticing to a kid. I didn't understand that this stamp had drugs in the adhesive on the back and from then on thought that sticking a postage stamp on my skin would kill me or make me very sick. And I was very wary of anyone (doctors offices, parade people, etc) who handed out stickers or stamps to little kids.

I used to believe that a search warrant was a person. Anytime the police needed to search someone's property, the "warrant" was allowed to go in and look around without permission from the owner

Me and my cousin were watching tv (me being 12 and mycousin being 6)
And we were watching the news and there was a thing about a molester so he asked me what that was so I said oh you mean the guy named moe lester??? He's a famous guy that livs in orogon! Of course he believed me and I'm glad that noone heard becasue I didn't want my aunt to go into dep covo's about the good people in the world and bad people who want to hur you!
LOL good times man! That cracks me up but I guess you sorta have to be there for it to be funny but I think it's really funny!
Hey we all have our own points of veiws!

I learned in the fourth grade that mixing drugs with drinks could kill you. A few months after when I was sick, my mom told me to swallow my advil with water. I cried because I thought she was trying to kill me!

When I first learned about illegal drugs, I heard that people sold them on the street. From then on I thought that in every single alley in every single town there was a man in a black coat with big pockets on the inside to hold all of the drugs. Until a while ago, I always ran really fast when I passed by an alleyway.

My parents always used to drive really slowly when they passed a police car, and when I asked why they told me it was because police officers would give them tickets if they drove too fast. I thought that anybody who gave my mom or dad a ticket must be evil, but I was confused because in the movies police officers were good. I came to the conclusion that cops in blue uniforms were good, and cops in black uniforms were bad.

When I was little, I always thought that if you said the name of a different restaraunt or grocery store than the one you were in, you would get kicked out or arrested. So for example, when my mom and I were shopping in Costco and she said "After I get the milk we're going to Fred Meyer's." I always said "Shhh! You can't say that! It's against the law!"