toilets

I used to believe…

My roommate Amy has a cousin called "Little Terry", because his father is also named Terry.

Little Terry is fluent in Spanish, his mother being Cuban, and so he refers to poo as "cacuca" /kah-KOO-kah/, like a nickname.

He never did quite get the hang of sharing, and so early on, when he'd go to the bathroom, he'd cry, "I don't want to flush!" When his mother, Anita, would ask why, he'd whine, "That's _my_ cacuca! I don't want to flush it!", as if he might be allowed to _keep_ the stuff. :P

I used to believe…

When I was about 6 we moved to a house that had an outside toilet, I was very afraid of going there at night and thought that the devil would bite my bum whilst I was sitting on it.

I used to believe…

When I was little I thought the devil lived in the toilet and if I flushed it he would come out and take me with him. So I would flush and run really fast into the living room. Silly me!

I used to believe…

"ashes to ashes, dust to dust, if it wasn't for your asshole your belly would bust!" This is what my non-religious father would say if asked to pray - talk about embarassing - but it also had me firmly convinced that not going to the restroom in a timely manner would make my belly get fat or even explode! So, yes, in my young and innocent mind all obese people really just needed a good bathroom break.

I used to believe…

When I was 8 or 9, one of my friends told me that the toilet talked to her when she used it late at night. for a good 4 or 5 years, I was terrified to go at night. I'd put the lid down immediately, wash my hands, do whatever else I could to do to delay the actual flushing, and then do a flush-and-run. The toilet never did say anything, though, and somehow I was always kind of insulted that it didn't - it would talk to her and not to me.

I used to think that the toilet water was immediately recycled to other parts of the house after flushing, so until I was 12 or so, I would wash my hands BEFORE I flushed the toilet at home. I also wouldn't get a drink of tap water for at least an hour after, and would let the toilet sit unflushed until after I showered if I had to use the restroom right before bathtime. I never was able to break the habit until I read a book about plumbing. oops.

i used to belive that the handiecap parking spaces where for people who had to just go in and use the restoom, because the picture looks like someone sitting on a toilet

I used to believe…

When I was little my mom used to but those things you put in the toilet to make the water turn blue. Well my brother once told me that it was make out of Smurf's (For those who don't know Smurfs are blue cartoon characters) and every time I would go it would make me cry.

I used to believe…

When I was about five or six, I was at the video store with my mother and as she was browsing I accidently came across the horror section and saw the cover of the film - I think it was 'Ghoulies' or something, anyway it has a sharped toothed green gremlin type thing coming out of a toilet. I couldn't get the image out of my head - just from a video cover. For the six or seven years, I had a fear of going to the toilet at night. If it was really urgent I would have to go through a ritual of turning on the light and checking under the toilet seat, and then ensuring that the door was firmly closed when I was finished, so I couldn't be visited by any green monsters in my room. I was terrified. It took significant effort to shake the feeling of fear right up until about the age of fifteen, even after I'd realised it wasn't possible to have monsters in the toilet.

I used to believe…

Some kid told me that the Cybermen from Doctor Who lived in drains, so I thought that if I was still in the toilet when when it finished flushing they would get me. Therefore, I had to sprint from the toilet down the hallway to the living room before the flushing stopped.

Thankfully I always made it in time.

Obviously.

I used to believe…

When I was little, I used to think that alligators or crocidiles would come up the toilet and eat my while I was on the "can". I'd sit on the toilet, do my business, then jump up as fast as I could and put the lid down... Then flush and laugh 'cause they didn't get me!!!

I was convinced that if you didn't wash your hands after going to the bathroom, they would catch on fire. I'm not sure if someone told me this or if it was my own invention, but it worked!

I used to believe…

When I was about six I heard that there were these spiders called black widows that hid under the loo seat who could bite you and you'd die in seconds! I used to check under the toilet seat for years after that.

I never realized blck widows only live in Austrailia!

I used to believe…

When I was small I used to believe that a monster lived in the toilet and ate my poo. I thought that if I sat on the throne for too long it would bite my bum, so I never closed the door until I was about 10 I would jump off and sprint into the hall.

I used to believe…

When i was a child I had to be extremely careful when going to the toilet in small stalls. The reason for this was because I belived the toilet would attac me when I flushed it if I didn't ran out of the stall or kept eye contact with it. Pretty hard to do that with a toilet, you can imagine.

I was TERRIFIED of public toilets. But there is a reason. When I was very young, I had a terrible dream that I went to use a restroom in a Chinese restaurant, and there was a giant toilet that flushed and swallowed me up. Then when I told my parents, my dad thought it was funny and confirmed that toilets will swallow me. I wasn't afraid of the toilets at home, because I knew they had never swallowed anyone, but public restrooms terrified me because they flush so loudly and with great force. I would hold it often until I wet myself. But somehow, I thought the toilet wouldn't swallow me if I was with someone. So in elementary school, I was often escorted to the bathroom.